Dating thread 230: Summer shenanigans!

[ButterflyOfShay]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread.
11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated
12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future
14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

Just checking in/placemarkingi. Didn't manage to before as i have been super busy!

Hey all. So I think I’ve dipped into this thread but didn’t really chat previously, but I’m definitely trying the old thing now so figure I can join in

im A bloke approaching 50 so this is all very different to when I was last single (around 40)

Checking in, had a really good date Monday, my type, lives near and great chemistry, still chatting and little flirty messages, keeping my fingers crossed it'll turn into a 2nd, still sexting an old date for fun in the meantime 🤞

Mr Turks got a g/f! (not me, lol!)
Friend did some sleuthing as promised and found this out!
Must have seen him 100+ times and never ONCE with a woman but hey ho that’s the information, so that’s that!!

Yeah.. marking his territory.. 😂😂

Welcome Floyd pepper! Hotnaked , how is it going with your iron???
@Lollysticks12 .. wow, super you had a great date
I have a new iron although it is too early to know. We will chat on the phone tomorrow. Polite and no nonsense.
@ibelieveinmirrorballs … saw my MrEx for a walk and lunch in the sun. It was lovely… but in a friendly way too. Very peaceful 😊
mum really glad I cut contact with MrC, when you get messages on the phone and roll your eyes… it can only mean one thing

ButterflyOfShay
😭😭😭😭
well . That’s disappointing

@ButterflyOfShay that's tragic. But at least now you know 😐

@Mila14 sounds like you did the right thing cutting MrC loose!

I'm still head over heels with MrS. The ED went away in a big way over the past weekend. We can't seem to keep our hands off each other. It was actually quite extreme, with very little sleep on the nights we saw each other.

He's coming over this evening to spend time with both me and my daughter together again. She seems to be very excited about this. My assumption is that my having a man friend isn't strange to her at all, as her daddy brought his girlfriend around from quite early on, long before they were officially in a relationship.

So all is going pretty well! I continue to pinch myself.

Shay how dare he!!! Doesn't he know you two are meant to be together? I'm not happy about this development. At all.

@hotnakedgelato this is SO adorable!! I am so so so glad you stuck with it 💗💗💗

Oh thanks darlings!! In a bloody weird and wonderful way I feel relieved 😂😂 I don’t even feel gutted! What’s that about 😂😂 im so odd.

@hotnakedgelato … that is so lovely 😊. Another one with fab story to tell here.
im taking it easy and will check irons as and when I feel like
I think for many of us this summer will be as single girls but out of our choice
One thing very clear to me going forward is that I am unable to have sex without feeling strong connection… I had fun with MrC but wanted to not see him again after that fun day

Onwards butterfly… you feel relief because there’s no pressure 😊

Its actually good to just know the truth! So it’s easy now to close that door and start perving elsewhere 👀😅

Am I being a bit picky?

im swiping left for anyone :
taller than me
with a dog
with a bunny ears filter
with a pout
with terrible eyebrows
who lives in Bangkok
who has no pic of their face
who says “are there any decent men out there”
who have pics of their kids
who only have group pics

@Thisisworsethananticpated I seriously doubt the "f*ck your sexy" types ever get any action. Also deleted the possible bot that was messaging. After more ignoring what I'd answered and then asking again he started asking me stuff like "with the experience you've had on here so far do you believe you will be able to find your soulmate" - I sent him a message saying something about his messages didn't seem right and as he'd also started to speak to me like I was part of a focus group it wasn't for me. Wished him well and deleted.

I don't think I've swiped right on any others before running out of profiles 😆

@ButterflyOfShay sorry to hear mr turk taken but at least you know and can turn attention elsewhere 😁

I think you are completely right on that. I don’t want to be a snob but those studying until 6th year I also go left. Unlikely to have much in common to be honest because I have tried and it’s just not right for me
Friends, I don’t mind anything ( WhatsApps with bunny ears and endless pics of dogs and kids… i love it from my friends and I never cared what their school level is) but a partner IS a different thing
I think you should go left on ANYTHING you are not comfortable with. I might be very picky but I prefer to meet less people and have a good time on a date even if there’s no chemistry

I think that’s a completely reasonable list, personally I like dogs so that was always a good 1st message for me.
I always used to avoid anyone who only had pics with sunglasses or wide brimmed hats and the low / no effort bio and tbh that got rid of most profiles…

oh and lots group pictures of drunk women, used to avoid those as well…

What a happy hot naked gelato we have 😊 Woo hoo 🥳

So I spoke to Mr Lawyer on the phone last night. Posh, but not a Tory or Brexiteer so I can accept that. But I found his way of speaking very distracting. I think he has a stammer, and he uses a technique to avoid stammering that involves lots of weird little outbreaths, possibly through his nose. It's hard to describe, but when we started talking he was walking home from somewhere and I wondered if he had walked past a garage checking tyre pressures. It felt a bit like talking to a steam train. I don't have a problem dating someone with a disability - I had a boyfriend who was a wheelchair user - it's more that it's really distracting and I've always found nose sounds a bit offputting and I wonder if I could ever fancy him.

It was a decent enough chat, lasted about an hour and a half, I don't think we'd struggle to find stuff to talk about. We have talked about meeting up next week when I'm child free but neither of us has messaged today. Not that we did much messaging before though. I should probably meet him and see if I can get past the weirdness 😐

@WeWantTheFinestWines … I think if he’s got decent conversation and you find him physically attractive it’s a good start. Maybe he was nervous/anxious ?

Talking to a steam train 😂😂

@WeWantTheFinestWines I had a stammer as a child and into my early teens , the breathing thing is probably to compensate for not being able to say certain words, it used to feel like my chest and voice were somehow “locked”, you could visually see the word or words, but just couldn’t formulate them in your voice somehow.

Personally I never thought I was disabled and I was fortunate enough to grow out of it.

Sorry to read your update @ButterflyOfShay but we won’t dwell on it. It has kept us all very engaged for the last few weeks- months even !
@hotnakedgelato great to hear things are going well with Mr S, last time you posted it seemed you were having some major doubts, unless I have confused you with someone else! Not difficult, my brain is not working like it used to. Discussed several times yesterday with Mr V about him getting the train over to watch my DD’s college performance- only to suddenly realise that there was a strike 🤦🏻‍♀️ He drove in the rush hour across town in the end. Today he’s tested positive for Covid !

I knew there was something else I meant to say.. @WeWantTheFinestWines could he have been breathing heavily whilst walking? Or did the steam train breathing continue throughout the whole 90mins ? Did he refer to it at all?