Boyfriend cancelled our anniversary meal ...

[pinkblueoh]

It's our three year anniversary next Sunday.
We had the day planned
Out for drinks then a meal on the Sunday night.
I had bought a new outfit and was really looking forward to it.
Now he has turned around and said the next day he is going away with work for an awards evening so wants to spend the Sunday just chilling out.
So he has said we can go for the meal on Thursday instead.
Would you be annoyed ? How he gets this work invite and all of a sudden our plans have to change.

Having a child is not a 'commitment'. All the threads on this site prove that.

Marriage is about far more than finance. It is emotional commitment, it is Next of Kin, it is healthcare/medical power of attorney, funeral planning, it is SO much more than about finance. It's the ultimate commitment that most women crave. I don't know any woman who doesn't long for that commitment. It's normal to not want it.

You're so, so rude.

Because they want to spend 20 years together but don't want to get married.

It's as simple as that.

Who do you think you are to challenge someone to give reasons for their life choices so you can decide if you deem them valid?

Really, really weird behaviour.

I'm not being rude, nor am I picking a fight. I am simply baffled why a woman wouldn't respect herself enough to want that commitment. Most women do, it's not normal to not want it. And it's debasing yourself to not want it imo. And I have a right to state my opinion as much as everyone else.

It's the ultimate commitment that most women crave. I don't know any woman who doesn't long for that commitment.

Well now you're come across one and you're being really rude to them.

It's completely bizarre.

Spoiler alert - different women want different things.

No, I'm not being rude. I think you are. I don't understand why you'd like someone enough to be with them for 20 years but not have a commitment. It's very odd. To me at least. So very odd. That's my opinion. You don't have to agree with it.

it's not normal to not want it

Aah, it's always nice when you see a poster who made batshit comments on one thread making equally batshit ones on a different topic on another. Really confirms you were right to question their mindset!

@Alb0

That's my opinion. You don't have to agree with it.

And the poster who has had a partner for 20 years and not married them has their opinion.

You don't agree with it but keep banging on about it and questioning them and calling it odd.

We get it, you don't understand it.

Take your own advice and accept people have different opinions and you don't have to agree with it.

Instead of going on and on about how weird you think it is.

That is rude.

If multiple people tell you you're being rude, unless your incredibly arrogant it's worth considering whether they might have a point, no?

*you're

Talking about batshit..... Right on cue.

We celebrate the anniversary of our first date and we're definitely not teenagers. I guess that makes us badly adjusted adults then! 4 years this month!

Talking about batshit..... Right on cue.

The lack self awareness is really impressive

Lol right back at you.

Most women do, it's not normal to not want it. And it's debasing yourself to not want it imo.

Debasing yourself? Bloody hell get a grip!

Have you always been such a cunt?

I don't particularly agree with the poster you've quoted, but you're (general) doing no one any favours calling them a bully etc and pretending you have the moral high ground, to then come out with this. If you disagree with them, fine, but resorting to name calling is a bit pathetic.

And bollocks to the pp who said you can't celebrate anniversaries if you're not married - what a crock of shit!!!

Chump change???
how rude and dismissive. No it's not.

There's always one

Some people never get married you know...3 years is hardly 'dating'

Yeah, I'm in a long term relationship, don't plan on getting married.

I was baffled why the op said boyfriend when talking about an anniversary that's all. Made absolutely no sense in my brain because I have literally never known a single adult to do this (I'm in the UK and feel this must be relevant!!).

I've since been corrected that actually most adults do in fact celebrate the day they became a couple.. All good 🤷🏻‍♀️

I wouldn't say most, it would be a few. But very few. Most adults don't.

So when people ask how long you've been together do you just look blankly at them and go uuuuuh
or do you say the actual number of years because you do in fact remember when you got together just like most people do?
why would you be so judgemental about people celebrating the anniversary of their relationship starting?

I find it hard to believe he has only just heard about this works event.

In my experience these 'works dos' are organised well in advance.

I'm not being judgemental, at all.. As I've stated so many times, I wasn't aware it was something anyone did. I just asked my dp, he said kids did it in school but that's about it. So yeah, it can't be that common 🤔 Regardless, I'm happy for people celebrating anything, especially these days.

I know roughly how long we've been together, I know the month! So it's easy to say we've been together 8 years, or whatever.

Yes, you are.

thank fuck.

& stop blaming Americans for anything you don't like.