Long ramble but don’t want to have to drip feed.
She doesn’t work and is on benefits. Has 2DC, one at primary school and one who is not yet at school age. She doesn’t drive and so a walk to drop off DC to school takes about 25 mins and so 4/5 times during the week she relies on everybody else to take DC to school and pick him up. Whether it be our mum, her friends, distant friends, me and so on... If she can’t find anyone to take him (she relies so heavily on favours that she’s exhausted all of her options now) then she will either take a taxi or leaves him off school. His attendance is atrocious and he loves school which is heartbreaking.
Her house is an absolute tip because ‘she has no energy to tidy’ and all she does is sleep or lay on the sofa. Her DC2 is awake at night because they nap so much throughout the day and then she uses it as an excuse to not get up in the morning to take DC1 to school and it’s a never ending cycle.
Even on a bright and sunny day she will just stay indoors and sleep/nap/do nothing.
She says she feels unwell pretty much every day yet if it’s the weekend/half term she’s absolutely fine and is never too unwell to go out drinking or socialise if the opportunity is there.
Her partner works and comes home and the house is a mess, my sis is asleep or looks a state (that sounds harsh but she really does - has put on a lot of weight and makes no effort in her appearance) and will still be in her PJs and so I feel like their relationship is really being affected. Her partner is struggling having to do the school run after work, tidy the house, get dinner, make dinner etc when she’s been at home all day. He has made passing comments to our mum.
She is on meds for depression which I sympathise with but also think she’s got herself into a rut now and uses her MH as an excuse to do jack shit.
Every time I (gently) approach her about this subject she gets so angry with me, hangs the phone up or refuses to see me. I know it’s out of embarrassment but she is in denial and now I’m walking on eggshells and at a loss as to what to do and how to help her?
It’s affecting her whole life, her relationships and my nephew/niece livelihoods. Any advice is appreciated.