Dating Thread 226: Springing into Spring

[Dancerinthemoonlight]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

Noted MrsBerthaRochester

I’m ignoring his text
Go me 😂

Good. Keep ignoring. Remember dick is low value and abundant. Why would you want the breadcrumbs they offer?

@MrsBerthaRochester

Good. Keep ignoring. Remember dick is low value and abundant. Why would you want the breadcrumbs they offer?

Does this go the other way as well?

I hate the idea of any human being referred to as ‘low value’ ☹️. If there is no respect between the genders, what on earth is this all FOR?

Sounds like someone’s been hurt!!

@Badbaddog

I hate the idea of any human being referred to as ‘low value’ ☹️. If there is no respect between the genders, what on earth is this all FOR?

I’ve got to agree with this. Mumsnet generally seems to see blokes as low value but I’d hoped this thread would be different (it was when I was last on here a while ago)

I’m regretting wiping Baltic’s texts
He’s texting normally and I’m stressed and premenstrual
What’s wrong with me , he’s quiet for one evening and I go mad

FloydPepper
I like men ! I think most do here
Well Obviously 😂
There is much bias on here to be honest

@Thisisworsethananticpated I couldn't remember if this was a fwb thing? Were you worried he had met someone else hence quiet?

Eesha
I’ve been very premenstrual and stressed and decided he’d gone off me
As he didn’t text me one evening
And I’m in a stressed tizzle
And yea it’s more FWB but he did refer to me as his ‘Gf’
Sorry I feel like such a twat

I think things have fizzled out with the guy I was speaking to earlier this week, but all hope isn't lost. I think the guy I was speaking to today wants to meet up with me.

He's a chef. He seems lovely. Really easy to chat to.

Watch this space, all ❤️

ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers

So go getting enthusiasm there

@Thisisworsethananticpated

ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers

So go getting enthusiasm there

@Thisisworsethananticpated I'm much more hopeful for this guy than the earlier guy admittedly 😀

It’s exactly what I do when I’m anxious and I think it’s a sign it’s not good for you. I deleted MrM’s chat and number a couple of times towards the end and you have to ask yourself what is promoting this..? Regardless of his behaviour it’s caused by an untenable level of anxiety that you’re searching for ways to soothe.

Have a virtual hand hold… all I can say is I get the same way, bloody hate it, and am not sure of the answers (other then therapy, which I’m having 🤪)

And he's not put off by my CP 😃

Mr Filthy and I postponed our meet yesterday after I had a frazzled day and he revealed a minor shoulder surgery had left him with stitches and a large unattractive dressing which might have detracted from any ensuing filth. We’ve pencilled 25th or possibly Monday but he’s got stitches till 29th and ohh FFS it’s all too complicated.

Other than that not much to report from me!

ibelieveinmirrorballs

Gosh , filthy in a large healing wound way
What a Wally he is is scheduling when he is post operative
That’s made me laugh 😂

If a guy wants you to be his gf then you will know about it. There will be no second guessing. Otherwise you just a convenient shag and probably not the only one.
I also recommend Abbydoesdating. She has loads of fantastic replies for folk that come creeping back for a shag.

ibelieveinmirrorballs
Thanks
I’ve also started therapy but mine just does guided mediation
And you know what , I should have ducking done one this morning really
But I take on board what you say

@Thisisworsethananticpated well quite. It doesn’t exactly scream erotica 😬

I’ve now got an old male friend wanting to come and stay night of 25th. So I’ll arrange to do that instead and rearrange…

@Thisisworsethananticpated

ibelieveinmirrorballs Thanks I’ve also started therapy but mine just does guided mediation And you know what , I should have ducking done one this morning really But I take on board what you say

On reflection I should have listened to my anxiety with MrM. It was my body/brain telling me it didn’t feel safe enough. Even though he was the strongest, calmest, nicest, treating-me-well-est person. Because ultimately he only wanted a part time girlfriend and he had told me he was emotionally unavailable and I pursued it anyway 🙄

I’m going to try and listen next time. Therapist says accept this is who you are and seek out someone who quells the anxiety, even if it feels a bit weird and suffocating to be with someone who actually is giving as much as you give them. Because you need to get used to what a healthy equal connection feels like.

@ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers
Which app are you on pls (just asking for a friend..), you see to match so easily..
Another date with Ms Horse Sat evening, she is coming to mine, what do I serve, hay & oats with a carrot cake for dessert, maybe get some sugar cubes in, just to keep her sweet?
Maybe she will saddle me 🥺

New here! Have been following the thread with interest as have just started OLD. on Hinge and Tinder.......
I'm late 30's and have been divorced for 2 years, so ready to meet someone, but I'm the most impatient person! I find it weird when they message you first, you message back and then nothing!
Hinge is abit depressing. I think I'm giving off the wrong vibes in my photos. I was so worried about getting weird pics, I think I've come across as abit prim and proper and the people liking haven't been my type at all.
Just looking forward to some dating..... But I can see how these apps can get all consuming.

[quote HowlongWillThisTakeNow]@ICrunchCrispsNotNumbers
Which app are you on pls (just asking for a friend..), you see to match so easily..
Another date with Ms Horse Sat evening, she is coming to mine, what do I serve, hay & oats with a carrot cake for dessert, maybe get some sugar cubes in, just to keep her sweet?
Maybe she will saddle me 🥺[/quote]
@HowlongWillThisTakeNow I'm on Hinge. I'm really liking it so far. I'm finding it much slower paced than some of the other apps I've been on. 👍🏻

I don't think I match easily. I find it really hard to find people to actually date. I'm quite shy with men really since I haven't dated many people. 😊

Good luck with your date with Miss H. Looking forward to reading how it goes 😘

Hi, I've just taken the plunge and joined an OLD site, bit apprehensive, this thread has already been helpful as a newbie so thanks 😊