Page 7 | Would you date a 53 year old if you were 35?

Clamchowder07 · 2022-03-08T21:35:22+00:00

Matched with someone on tinder. Have got on very well so far.. He was very upfront about his age. I'm wondering if it's too much of a gap? Conversation has been good and free flowing. Are there more cons to pros with a significant age gap?

Itchinforabitchin · 09/03/2022 10:16

Yes. Rubs thighs

Amandasummers · 09/03/2022 10:21

I would

grapewines · 09/03/2022 10:30

I would but not if they had kids younger than me. That would definitely be a line.

5128gap · 09/03/2022 10:34

[quote Littlebylittlelittle]@SauceGirl
Yes please post a pic so all us old hags can see what true beauty looks like[/quote]
I think thats unlikely to happen. My suspicions are that the poster is a man in his 50s.

MotherofAutism · 09/03/2022 11:56

Absolutely not! No I wouldn't. I'm late thirties and nope. No disrespect to 53yr old me, but in my personal view, that would potentially mean I lose the person I love, years before I otherwise may have.

Yea, I know either of us could be knocked over by a bus tomorrow, before anyone says it! The odds are though, that I'd end up widowed in my mid fifties/sixties & heartbroken. Yet had I married/settled down with someone my own age, I would likely have up to an extra 20 years with the person I love

MotherofAutism · 09/03/2022 11:59

@MotherofAutism

Absolutely not! No I wouldn't. I'm late thirties and nope. No disrespect to 53yr old me, but in my personal view, that would potentially mean I lose the person I love, years before I otherwise may have.

Yea, I know either of us could be knocked over by a bus tomorrow, before anyone says it! The odds are though, that I'd end up widowed in my mid fifties/sixties & heartbroken. Yet had I married/settled down with someone my own age, I would likely have up to an extra 20 years with the person I love

No disrespect to 53yr old MEN not me! 🤦🏼‍♀️

Also to clarify, it's nothing to do with not fancying 53yr old men! 🙃 Some are very hot! 🥵

Iwantnodrama · 09/03/2022 12:01

I'm 33 with a 48 year old boyfriend. So yeah I would..although mines going through some personal struggles so it's not been perfect.

sqirrelfriends · 09/03/2022 12:02

Nah, too much of a gap imo. I couldn't imagine being 40 and going out with a 60 year old.

TheCatterall · 09/03/2022 12:03

Meh. I’ve dated someone 18 years younger and my current OH is 63 next week - I’m 47.

Age is but a number. It’s the person I value.

HereBdragons · 09/03/2022 12:04

Not a fucking chance

Notwithittoday · 09/03/2022 12:06

Depends what your life goals are really and what he has to offer. Better an old man’s darling than a young man’s maid.

Titsflyingsouth · 09/03/2022 12:59

Each to their own but personally, for me, it would be a no....

SVRT19674 · 09/03/2022 13:33

Mmmm no, and I´m 47!

JaceLancs · 09/03/2022 13:44

I would if he was young at heart and physically fit - I know men my age (57) who are like Victor Meldrew and others who I feel at home with
FWIW my DF was 14 years older than DM, she retired at 51 to enjoy retirement together - he died at 94 when she was 80, he was much more able even in his older years as she developed Alzheimer’s mid 70s
There’s a similar age gap between DB and DSIL however she is the older - she struggled with retiring whilst he still works
I have also tried big age gap - he was 50 when I was 35 - it didn’t work for other reasons - we are still in touch - I’m glad we didn’t stay together though as I feel in my prime and he suddenly aged since COVID

Gonnagetgoing · 09/03/2022 13:44

I’m dating an almost 53 year old but he’s young at heart and I dated him 11 years ago! If we didn’t get on so well I’d throw him back!

CatFacedGirl · 09/03/2022 17:10

@Littlebylittlelittle no not really. That's just a dick of a man who only wants to shag much younger women. And it's of course revolting

Ageism is where people use throwaway comments like ' ugh, he's old as fuck!' or 'stupid old woman,' '53?! God you'll be like a carer' and 'just an old bag'

There's some examples of casual ageism. But you knew that right?

Whatdramain2022 · 09/03/2022 17:26

Don't go there. My Dsis has a similar age gap. He's now in nappies and she has to clean his bum.

rumred · 09/03/2022 17:34

I've dated with a big age gap and the problem was points of reference and life experience. Lack of. You definitely get more stuck in your ways as you age, it can't be helped. That doesn't excuse being an arse hole, it means you have habits especially around the house that are ingrained, for example.
Anyway, I'm trying to say age may be just a number but it does indicate different life stages which can be tricky to navigate.

Rizzoli123 · 09/03/2022 18:34

Age dosen't matter as long as you feel safe and happy in the relationship. There was an 18 year age gap between my mum and dad and they were very happy together

MsHighwater · 09/03/2022 18:48

This is very nearly exactly me and DH, tho we met irl.
That was 20 years ago and we're still very happy so it can work.
But it is a big gap and that can be challenging, especially down the line.** There's nothing wrong with it being a deal breaker for you.

stripeyflowers · 09/03/2022 19:02

I'm in my fifties - no, I would not.

BOOTS52 · 09/03/2022 19:09

Personally if I was in my 30's again would date no one ha!!!!! For me it would be too much of an age gap but you will never know until you meet up for a coffee and see how you get on. You might get on great and be a great match but only time will tell. Nothing to lose if you meet up and there is no connection but you would always wonder what if. For me it would be too much an age gap but he could be young at heart and be a really good man as others have stated on here that they are very happy with older partners. Just meet up and see how it goes and let us all know as it could be true love.

PinotPony · 09/03/2022 19:12

DP is 18 years younger than me, he's 29, I'm 47. Been together two years.
Met online.

He's currently at uni. I'm planning my retirement..! We have an absolute blast together and I love him dearly.

Chances are it won't last long term but who cares?! Live for the moment, I say! Do what makes you happy now. Life is short, you could get hit by a bus tomorrow.

There's absolutely no harm in you going on a date with this chap. That doesn't mean you want to spend the rest of your life with him. Try him out, it sounds like you might get on well.

CheckandChallenge · 09/03/2022 20:18

So I decided to unmatch him on the basis I couldn't see any future potential. My absolute top end is around 47 and I think that would've been too much.

Littlebylittlelittle · 09/03/2022 20:45

[quote CatFacedGirl]@Littlebylittlelittle no not really. That's just a dick of a man who only wants to shag much younger women. And it's of course revolting

Ageism is where people use throwaway comments like ' ugh, he's old as fuck!' or 'stupid old woman,' '53?! God you'll be like a carer' and 'just an old bag'

There's some examples of casual ageism. But you knew that right? [/quote]
Of course the comments you reference are agesisn but to say that men treating older women as if they are less valuable than younger is just ‘some man being a dick ‘ is disingenuous
It’s way way more than ‘just some man ‘ . It’s a cultural issue where womens aging is treated as somehow ‘worse’ than mens . Where women are told they need to do whatever it takes to look young and where men , very very many of them ‘ refuse to date omen their own age and promote the idea that a woman’s youth is somehow one of her more important attributes
It’s about way more than ‘just some fivk of a man who Ho wants to date younger women ‘