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Relationships

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Would you date a 53 year old if you were 35?

186 replies

Clamchowder07 · 08/03/2022 21:35

Matched with someone on tinder. Have got on very well so far.. He was very upfront about his age.
I'm wondering if it's too much of a gap? Conversation has been good and free flowing. Are there more cons to pros with a significant age gap?

OP posts:
Ellaraine · 08/03/2022 22:47

Nope, I'm 41 and wouldn't.

Clamchowder07 · 08/03/2022 22:47

I would struggle to see what we had in common too... His old would be my ancient....

OP posts:
MistySkiesAfterRain · 08/03/2022 22:48

10 years max. Much older than that and they would be slowing down and ageing much before you. That was the advice I had from someone who did do a much larger age gap.

ABitBesotted · 08/03/2022 22:48

Yep.

stealthninjamum · 08/03/2022 22:49

I’m not inherently against age differences, if you meet a friend of a friend or someone at work I can see how an attraction can grow. However I’m slightly uneasy about older men doing old who are only after an ego boost. When I did old it was just full of men who even put on their profile that they’d date someone only if they were 5 to 20 years younger and the arrogance and entitlement of them just makes me uneasy. I found a lovely man on old but we’re the same age and I feel like a partner not a trophy.

WaterBottle123 · 08/03/2022 22:52

Why did you have your age filter that high??

Clamchowder07 · 08/03/2022 22:54

I actually didn't. That's a good point. My filters were 37 to 47.. Which would say he's lied about his age when setting up his profile wouldn't it 🤔

OP posts:
Momijin · 08/03/2022 22:54

Christ no. I'm.nearly that age and I cant imagine being with a 70 year old!

Seriously there are plenty of men, find someone a lot younger than that. I wouldn't go more than 5 years older or younger

HopingForMyRainbowBaby · 08/03/2022 22:57

There's 18 years between me and my partner so yes I definitely would

ABitBesotted · 08/03/2022 22:59

Seriously there are plenty of men,

But vanishingly few you'd want to share your life with.

NeverChange · 08/03/2022 23:01

Ideally no, would prefer to keep it to max 10 but at the same time I know some very happy couples with large age gaps.

There's a lot of other dealbreakers higher up the list than age.

Hydrate · 08/03/2022 23:02

No.

Sunnytwobridges · 08/03/2022 23:03

Nah, that's too big of a gap. At 35 I wouldn't go more than 7-10 years older. And I say this as a 50 yr old woman who dated 53 yr old man, and he was stuck in his ways.

But I have a friend that did and they are great together, she's an "older spirit" so it works for them.

Fayekrista · 08/03/2022 23:04

I'm 33.... partner 53 very soon.... both were done with kids so not an issue.... well we now have a 6 month old 🤣🙈

HollowTalk · 08/03/2022 23:12

Ask him whether he would date a 71-year-old woman. That's your answer. And if he says yes, ask what his search criteria was on the website.

HollowTalk · 08/03/2022 23:13

@Clamchowder07

I generally go for older men, but 10 years maximum. This is pushing it a bit, suppose one date to suss him out wouldn't hurt.
Going for older men when you are younger is one thing because so many young men are very immature. Once you reach a certain age though, I think looking for men in your own age group is the best thing to do.
ChazzaGirl · 08/03/2022 23:14

@Clamchowder07

I actually didn't. That's a good point. My filters were 37 to 47.. Which would say he's lied about his age when setting up his profile wouldn't it 🤔
Not necessarily, I think some OLD sites may allow some leeway for age ranges.

If he’s nice and you like him, go for it!

Notallcatsarenicecats · 08/03/2022 23:15

Nope!

Infinitemoon · 08/03/2022 23:18

I am 35. My ex-husband is 54 now.

When I'm on Tinder these days my absolute limit is 41. And even then it would feel like I'm short-changing myself!

This is good advice from QueenCamilla

Deadringer · 08/03/2022 23:18

no

EmpressSuiko · 08/03/2022 23:18

No

Infinitemoon · 08/03/2022 23:19

Why do I feel like a vigilante stopping young women from the perils of my peers! Grin

Threeboysandadog · 08/03/2022 23:19

Dh and I have been married for 30 years and as per my user name have Three boys and a dog (have had 7 dogs over those years but only one now). He is 74 and I am 58. It’s never really felt like a big age difference. There was almost 3 years between my dm and dd and my mum was widowed at 50 so who knows what the future holds!
You could meet him and see how it goes.

ladydimitrescu · 08/03/2022 23:21

Yup - I'm 30, Dave Bautista is 53, and im waiting for the day he realises we are actually soulmates.
Nobody ruin this for me Grin

nomorefrogs · 08/03/2022 23:22

I'm 50 and divorced from a now 55 year old. Currently casually seeing a fit 38 year old who has put a spring in my step. Would definitely date younger again as most men my age are miserable old gits with sexual dysfunction issues and not fun to be around. Not sure if I would want to make it a permanent thing with a 12 year age gap but it's great fun for now and we have a blast together.

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