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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Have I over-reacted? Struggling to forgive my DD

339 replies

thepeopleversuswork · 04/03/2022 09:12

Found out yesterday my DD (11) has downloaded some computer games which I have been paying for without authorisation (the account was foolishly linked to my bank account. I know I have been really stupid on this front so please don't give me a hard time). I've cancelled the account, removed the games she's ordered and confiscated the laptop and her other devices for two weeks. We've had a long talk and I have let her know she has destroyed my trust and she will have to work hard to earn it back and repay the money (about £40).

She was hugely apologetic and has said she will do what it takes to make it up to me etc. We left things on friendly and loving terms last night after a good discussion: I said I loved her and would always forgive her but there needed to be an appropriate punishment and I needed her to demonstrate to me that I can trust her before I will let her download any new games. (Clearly she's not getting access to anything linked to my bank account again).

I'm still feeling really upset and angry this morning that she was able to find it in herself to do this and am struggling to move past it. I know its important to set boundaries and appropriate punishments but forgive and move on but this morning she started trying to bargain to get the game back (if I do this can I get it back in this timeframe etc). I flared up and said I'm sick of hearing about computer games and I never want her to talk to me about them again (I am sick of hearing about them tbh: I find them utterly tedious and I resent the amount of time and energy that she spends talking and thinking about them). She's a good kid, doing well at school and has other interests etc. TBH I loathe computer games, I find them to be a total waste of time and I resent the amount of time that her generation spends on them. If I could, I'd completely ban them but that's another story.

I just want some advice about how to deal with this. I've never in the past found it hard to forgive her, even if she's been really naughty. I've always thought she's a monkey but would not do anything devious like this and the whole thing has frightened and distressed me and I'm still holding quite a bit of anger towards her.

I know I need to hold the line on the punishment but move past the anger but I'm finding it hard and its scared me a bit. Any advice here?

OP posts:
Dixiechickonhols · 04/03/2022 12:04

You are completely over reacting. Your hatred of computer games is colouring your views. It’s a normal leisure activity - why is watching tv or going on mumsnet better.
To be frank she shouldn’t have been able to spend your money you are adult who gave her the device and set it up.
She may not have been clear she was spending real money it’s not in same league as stealing from purse.
I’d have had a chat, unlinked card and made it clear how careful you need to be online about purchases.
If you react so ott to this how will you deal with teen years.

TillyTopper · 04/03/2022 12:04

Sorry but I think you are over reacting. She is 11. I assume you linked your account to it. I would say what you have done is punishment enough and leave it at that. As a mum of two 21 year olds I have to say you're going to need to chill a bit more for teenage years.

Bumpsadaisie · 04/03/2022 12:05

[quote thepeopleversuswork]@EarringsandLipstick

Thank you. It's not easy to hear some of this but I totally accept that I've been irrational and unkind and have some work to do on myself.

I don't know how to relax either and actually relaxing or being unproductive makes me feel very stressed out, jittery and uncomfortable. The idea of doing nothing brings me out in hives tbh. I have the constant feeling that if I take my eye off the ball ever for a few minutes I will miss something/fail someone.

In part, as well, I don't think all of that is totally unhealthy. I want her to grow up understanding that life is tough and you can only ever rely on yourself. It's particularly important to me that she grows up understanding the need for financial independence and never to rely on a man for money. So she will need to learn to work hard, be resilient and self-reliant.

I guess I need for this to be balanced with a sense of acceptance and the space for her to be herself.[/quote]

I can see where you are coming from and I am sure your experiences in life have led you to feel that you are alone and have only yourself to rely on.

But I think you need to work hard on this. This philosophy causes you a lot of damage. You can't sit still without coming out in hives. No wonder - you feel you are totally alone. You sound totally frantic. But none of that sounds much fun.

Actually you are not alone - you have help (witness this thread). And you know how to reach our for it and accept it (again, see this thread!)

THAT is the important thing that you should teach your DD. Not that she is an island who will have to manage alone forever. But that the world is full of ways you can be helped, if you can but turn towards it.

You know this somewhere as you turned to this forum today. 🙂

People who can acknowledge their need, ask for help, and accept it, are much more grounded and happy than people who can't. They don't feel alone and they don't feel so burdened by life.

Rosebuud · 04/03/2022 12:05

[quote thepeopleversuswork]@EarringsandLipstick

Thank you. It's not easy to hear some of this but I totally accept that I've been irrational and unkind and have some work to do on myself.

I don't know how to relax either and actually relaxing or being unproductive makes me feel very stressed out, jittery and uncomfortable. The idea of doing nothing brings me out in hives tbh. I have the constant feeling that if I take my eye off the ball ever for a few minutes I will miss something/fail someone.

In part, as well, I don't think all of that is totally unhealthy. I want her to grow up understanding that life is tough and you can only ever rely on yourself. It's particularly important to me that she grows up understanding the need for financial independence and never to rely on a man for money. So she will need to learn to work hard, be resilient and self-reliant.

I guess I need for this to be balanced with a sense of acceptance and the space for her to be herself.[/quote]
Ah op. As much as I understand your mindset, I also taught my daughter to be self reliant, but I don’t think you need to be so very hard like this. Of course she can rely on people she trusts. Teaching her how to understand trust is where it’s at.

I think you need to seek help. This doesn’t sound like a healthy environment for a child or for you.

CousinKrispy · 04/03/2022 12:05

I think learning to be self-reliant is a GREAT goal for your child (and yourself!), but being unable to relax, and modeling that behaviour for her, is potentially going to lead to far bigger MH problems than a bit of gaming.

Do you have an employee assistance program at your workplace you could turn to for a bit of free counseling? Talking with a neutral professional about it might help.

I'm not necessarily saying you have to change. But your daughter has her own personality and will have her own life. It could drive a wedge between you if you get trapped in thinking that your way (no relaxing, no "unproductive" time) is the right way for everyone.

gamerchick · 04/03/2022 12:05

We all turn into our parents at some point if we're not aware. You've just turned into your mother a bit.

Remember the feeling you had when she would turn off the telly. You don't want your kid passing on that stuff. You see gaming a waste of time. Atm I see massive puzzles that take a lot of brainwork to work out. Exercises for the mind some of them.

The bank card hooked up to an account is firmly on your shoulders blame wise, don't do that but she does need a consequence for ploating your bank account without asking.

godmum56 · 04/03/2022 12:06

[quote thepeopleversuswork]@EarringsandLipstick

Thank you. It's not easy to hear some of this but I totally accept that I've been irrational and unkind and have some work to do on myself.

I don't know how to relax either and actually relaxing or being unproductive makes me feel very stressed out, jittery and uncomfortable. The idea of doing nothing brings me out in hives tbh. I have the constant feeling that if I take my eye off the ball ever for a few minutes I will miss something/fail someone.

In part, as well, I don't think all of that is totally unhealthy. I want her to grow up understanding that life is tough and you can only ever rely on yourself. It's particularly important to me that she grows up understanding the need for financial independence and never to rely on a man for money. So she will need to learn to work hard, be resilient and self-reliant.

I guess I need for this to be balanced with a sense of acceptance and the space for her to be herself.[/quote]
poor little girl....I am not saying that she doesn't need to learn to be confident and independent but don't you think you are raising her through the filter of your own issues and bad experiences? Not knowing how to relax and constant fear of failure must be exhausting for you...do you really want to pass that on to your child? Do you think you might need some help with your feelings?

whywouldntyou · 04/03/2022 12:06

@ufucoffee

OP I'm with you on this one. I'd be furious as well and I'd still be furious the day after. Any attempt at a conversation about being let back on the game would be met with the look that told my children don't you dare. Don't discuss anything until she's paid back the money, by chores is a good idea.
Me too. For those saying 'bloody hell it's only £40' how about if that was the OPs only money for the rest of the month? Would the DD go into her purse and taken £40? Highly unlikely! However you wish to phrase it she has stolen from OP and she needs to understand that and deal with consequences. She is 11 not 5!
BuddhaForMary · 04/03/2022 12:07

What's with the single parent bashing on this thread?? I've been a single parent for years. It has absolutely nothing to do with how OP has reacted.

girlmom21 · 04/03/2022 12:08

she has stolen from OP and she needs to understand that and deal with consequences. She is 11 not 5!

And she's been given and accepted the consequences. OP was continuing to be dismissive and shouting at DD etc after that - and after telling her she was forgiven. That's the issue, not the completely justified consequences

BertieBotts · 04/03/2022 12:09

It sounds like you feel about video games the way your parents felt about TV.

Do you watch TV now? Do you get enjoyment out of it even though there are certainly other activities which are more productive? Do you think it would be reasonable to adopt this kind of view over computer games? I think it probably would; no, you don't need to do a 180 and start to love them, but you could accept them as a mindless form of entertainment which is mostly harmless, especially with limits and controls in place. If that feels impossible, then yes perhaps therapy would be useful.

I think at 11, you could be halfway honest with her: State clearly that you don't like video games, and you're not interested in them. You will let her play them under XYZ condition, but you don't really want to talk about them. She can surely talk to friends her own age about them instead. And I don't think it is unreasonable to not want to talk about this when you feel angry, but I also think it would be useful to try and reframe - if she had spent the money on a book subscription instead you'd still be cross but perhaps not feel so betrayed?

I think it might be almost resentment because you don't really want her to have computer games in the first place, so by allowing her to have some you have already been more generous than you feel is reasonable. You feel on some level that she should acknowledge this and be very grateful. Instead, she has childishly and impulsively (because she is a child with immature impulse control, ie perfectly age appropriate mistake) gone against this to procure more.

This feels worse than another kind of misbehaviour, because of the fact you end up feeling "But I've let you do this, which was more than I felt reasonable, and yet you want more??"

Whereas from her perspective, perhaps compared to her friends, she is perhaps very restricted in which games she is allowed; they become shiny forbidden fruit. When presented with a way to access this rarity, she takes it, without thinking through what that could mean.

It is reminiscient of feelings that come up when parents have loose boundaries because they don't want to fight with their children or because they want to be the "fun parent" that says yes all the time - the children get used to exceptions being made constantly, and start to see the exception as being the rule. Then when the parents try to enforce what they think of as the rule, the children are whiny and non-cooperative, which is very triggering for the parent as they feel "But I've given you all this - can't you respect me just this once??"

In that scenario it's because the parents' beliefs (sofas are not for eating on, for example) and their boundaries (oh but go on then just this once every time they are tired) are not aligned/matching. I think you have the same issue. Your actual belief is no video games at all, but your boundary is OK, you can have some. When your DD wants to tip "some" into "more", that is triggering of rage like behaviour and resentment as it feels like she doesn't understand/appreciate what you have already given her in terms of compromosing your beliefs.

In the boundary problem, the fix is to bring the boundaries in line with where the parents' rules/beliefs actually are. In your problem, it sounds like you don't want to do that because you think that would be an unreasonable boundary to hold, so it might be more helpful to try and bring your beliefs in line with the boundary (some video games are OK some of the time).

It is obviously nothing to do with being a single parent, that post was utterly bonkers and unfair.

girlmom21 · 04/03/2022 12:09

@BuddhaForMary

What's with the single parent bashing on this thread?? I've been a single parent for years. It has absolutely nothing to do with how OP has reacted.
OP's blamed her reaction on the way she feels being a single parent...
thepeopleversuswork · 04/03/2022 12:09

@godmum56

I think in my mum's case it was connected with a sense of intellectual inferiority she had. My mum didn't go to university and through marriage and chance ended up in an environment where she was surrounded by highly educated people. She had a massive chip on her shoulder about it and was determined that education and self-improvement was the key to life. And she saw television as something which drained attention away from these sorts of self-improving pursuits. Again, up to a point she was right. It was the degree and the irrational nature of it which was the problem.

In terms of my comment about not having time to play with her: I work FT so there's very little time to do anything other than work and management of the home. I have to rationalise this anyway many days there just isn' t time to do anything other than essential stuff and tbh if I do have a chance to do something with her, I'd rather prioritise something which I enjoy over that.

OP posts:
ukborn · 04/03/2022 12:11

£40? My friends son racked up £3000 on some fifa points (I think it was FIFA, but whatever) before they realised. Blow up and apologies and some money was recovered.
While my dd would never dream of it my son has definitely bought the odd £1.99 thing - adding up over time.
Normal behaviour, hopefully she's learned her lesson, but move on. You pick your battles and this is barely a squirmish.

jennystears · 04/03/2022 12:11

Complete over reaction. You'll need to keep your nerves about you once the real teen years arrive soon.

godmum56 · 04/03/2022 12:12

[quote thepeopleversuswork]@tinierclanger

It’s worth examining your thought process around this as well. Life doesn’t always have to be productive. It is entirely legitimate to spend some time having non-productive fun…!

This is a whole other thread but this is something I really struggle with. I have to be massively productive all the time just to get my life to function because I'm a working lone parent. There's never any room for slack in the system and almost no downtime, or me time, ever. So I slightly resent it when other people get to lie around being unproductive because I don't have that luxury. Again, that's my problem and not hers but it is what it is.[/quote]
there are loads of working lone parents on MN (I am not one) who still manage to have some time to relax. I am sure that you believe what you are saying is true but not sure that it is factually accurate.

Santaslittlemelter · 04/03/2022 12:12

@LondonWolf

Also, "forgive her" for what exactly? This is worrying language around normal behaviour.
Exactly! She’s your child! I don’t think forgiveness comes into the parent child relationship at all. Especially at this age. She does owe you perfection but you do owe her guidance and opportunities to learn. Here’s one right now.

But I’m afraid all you’re teaching here is that your love is conditional and how to hold a grudge.

Santaslittlemelter · 04/03/2022 12:13

Doesn’t owe you perfection!

BuddhaForMary · 04/03/2022 12:13

OPs daughter wouldn't know if it was her mum's last £40 or not, and she's a kid - we all know they think money grows on trees. And if OP hadn't linked her bank card it wouldn't have happened in the first place so...

You can't credit an 11yo child with an adults thought process. OP has dished out consequences and her daughter has accepted it. Time to move on instead of drag it out and make the kid feel any worse than she already does. All this talk of breach of trust and forgiveness is way over the top quite frankly, it's how you'd refer to another adult or a late teen not a little girl.

BeforeGodAndAllTheFish · 04/03/2022 12:13

Management of the home?
Jesus. That is not an excuse for not doing things with your kid.

I work full time. I'm a single parent to 2 kids. They see their dad for about 6 hours a week so I dont get chunks of time off. Guess what we did last night...ewe built a fort in the living room. It was a nerf gun battle a few nights ago.

My house is "managed" (whatever the hell that means).

How do you have no time for her?

thepeopleversuswork · 04/03/2022 12:14

@BuddhaForMary

What's with the single parent bashing on this thread?? I've been a single parent for years. It has absolutely nothing to do with how OP has reacted.
I am a single parent so I'm not bashing single parents. I feel rightly or wrongly that some of my reaction to this is bound up with being a single parent because:

a) I have to work a lot and don't have much time to play with her
b) There's no-one else to help
c) I'm particularly sensitive to the fact that I have an obligation to raise her to be successful and independent because my experience has been that there is no one I can rely on except myself and its likely she will have the same experience
d) There was a particular issue in lockdown for single parents because we were required to work and home school while also looking after children with no support. It was absolutely horrendous for me because i was constantly caught between a rock and a hard place and it led to far much screen time because it was often the only way to guarantee the quiet and focus needed to get work done.

OP posts:
Whatthefleckster · 04/03/2022 12:14

Computer games aren't necessarily all bad, they are far better than social media for girls. Get the child a bank account (go Henry or something) and link that to their account so they can learn to be responsible with online money.

If you're 40+ consider if the rage maybe hormone related.

godmum56 · 04/03/2022 12:15

[quote thepeopleversuswork]@godmum56

I think in my mum's case it was connected with a sense of intellectual inferiority she had. My mum didn't go to university and through marriage and chance ended up in an environment where she was surrounded by highly educated people. She had a massive chip on her shoulder about it and was determined that education and self-improvement was the key to life. And she saw television as something which drained attention away from these sorts of self-improving pursuits. Again, up to a point she was right. It was the degree and the irrational nature of it which was the problem.

In terms of my comment about not having time to play with her: I work FT so there's very little time to do anything other than work and management of the home. I have to rationalise this anyway many days there just isn' t time to do anything other than essential stuff and tbh if I do have a chance to do something with her, I'd rather prioritise something which I enjoy over that.[/quote]
again this may be your truth but are you sure its everyone's truth? maybe a post elsewhere on MN asking other lone parents who work ft how they manage to find time for themselves and to spend time with their children. I know for my own reasons that its easy to hide behind "I am too busy"

thepeopleversuswork · 04/03/2022 12:16

@BeforeGodAndAllTheFish

Management of the home? Jesus. That is not an excuse for not doing things with your kid.

I work full time. I'm a single parent to 2 kids. They see their dad for about 6 hours a week so I dont get chunks of time off. Guess what we did last night...ewe built a fort in the living room. It was a nerf gun battle a few nights ago.

My house is "managed" (whatever the hell that means).

How do you have no time for her?

@BeforeGodAndAllTheFish

Because I'm working 10 hours a day.

Sorry but your post is unhelpful and unkind. You don't know my circumstances and what I can or can't find time for.

Bully for you that you have time to build forts and have nerf gun battles. By all means judge me for this incident but don't judge me for having to work.

OP posts:
MsSquiz · 04/03/2022 12:17

You asked in your OP for people not to give you a hard time because the account was linked to your bank account... sorry, but after reading all of your posts, I'm just going to be blunt.

You have allowed her to play these games

You left your card linked to the account

You obviously don't regularly check what she's doing online and so haven't noticed the purchases

You have now told her she cannot talk to you about something she enjoys. Maybe she thinks your conversation is tedious and irrelevant?

You are the adult in this situation but you don't appear to be taking much responsibility - blaming lockdown for her playing too much? Why weren't you putting boundaries in place then, to prevent her playing too much or becoming "addicted"? Because it was easier to let her sit and play the games until something like this happens, then it's all her fault and seemingly unforgivable? Maybe you should be a lot more annoyed with yourself for allowing the situation to get this far, rather than not forgiving an 11 year old?