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Original poster

Dating someone shorter than you?

193 replies

oopsmoment · 13/02/2022 15:01

All my ex's have mostly been 5'11 to over 6ft (I'm 5'8) I've just started dating someone and he's reasonable looking but he's only about my height, maybe slightly shorter. If I wear boots with slight heels I'm definitely taller than him.
Would this give you the ick? Or not bother you?
Any of you have DPs/DHs shorter than you?
Thank you.

OP posts:
heyyellowyellow · 14/02/2022 15:48

Pre-parenthood, I had a couple of shorter boyfriends, although they were both around 5’7 to my 5’4.

Last week, I went on a date with someone who had already said they weren’t so tall, I didn’t ask as my previous experience was that it didn’t bother me in the slightest. It turned out that he was 5’2 ish… the really odd feeling was though that when we were standing up, each time I caught him out the side of my eye, it felt like I was on a date with my son. I just couldn’t shake it off and can only attribute it to now being a mum. We got on well but the thought of being flirty with him or anything more made me feel really uncomfortable.

Lockheart · 14/02/2022 15:56

The worst boyfriend I ever had was 6'6". Tall, sure, but with a thing for prostitutes.

On the other hand I had a lovely few months with a chap who was 5'7". Very intelligent, very well spoken, incredibly good looking (I was definitely punching way above my weight, he honestly looked like Henry Cavill with lighter hair), very attentive. If he hadn't moved abroad I'd probably have married him. I still miss him now!

I'm 5'11".

Height is no indication of how good a person someone is.

cherrysthename · 14/02/2022 16:07

No, Lockheart, but it's an indication of how tall someone is. And some people have preferences when it comes to sexual attraction which is fine.

I've had same height as me partners before but I don't think I would again if I were to actively seek another relationship because I'm a bit older now and know it's ok to want what I want now.

SmallThingsEverywhere · 14/02/2022 16:13

“Height is no indication of how good a person someone is”. Well, yeahHmm. However we’re discussing initial attraction and you can’t help who you are attracted to.
Not sure why women are being told that we’re shallow for being attracted to tall men. Stop shaming a perfectly natural instinct. How would you know how “nice” or “good “ a man is purely by looking at them? However, you can judge how attracted you are to them based on their physical characteristics.
Every time these threads pop up, people try and guilt trip us into dating short men😂 . Give me strength!

ravenmum · 14/02/2022 16:19

My exh had blue eyes. Since breaking up with him I have exclusively dated men with brown eyes.
Not because I think that men with blue eyes are bad. Because I have actually always found brown eyes more attractive.

tallgirlhello · 14/02/2022 16:40

As I said, there was a similar thread on here a few months ago. At the end of the day you like what you like. It doesn't mean you are shallow. You've got to fancy someone to date them otherwise it's like going out with a friend.

I was chatting to a man online who said he would prefer someone shorter than me. I'm almost 6 foot tall and he was my height.

I didn't take offence or think he was shallow. That's his preference. We all have them.

linchinton · 14/02/2022 22:09

I've had short partners my whole life and the last one endlessly fat-shamed me when I was size 12. I never was bothered that they were short.

Now I date over 6ft-ers.
It makes ME feel feminine and I love it, I never thought it was important, in fact I thought it would make me feel a bit physically intimidated, but now I'm just not attracted to short guys. I do think my horrible ex has a lot to do with this though.

linchinton · 14/02/2022 22:14

@TheRealityCheque

Ruling out guys based on a physical characteristic is so unbelievably shallow.

Imagine a thread where a load of blokes talk about what size breasts a woman should have to be acceptable to date.

No...no I just can't imagine the poor menz ever having that discussion, no not ever.
Lpc3 · 14/02/2022 23:04

Men have preferences but generally take what they can get. Women have preferences and can generally afford to pick who they want. Who can blame them I'd do exactly the same.

Anothergreatday · 14/02/2022 23:23

@TheRealityCheque

Ruling out guys based on a physical characteristic is so unbelievably shallow.

Imagine a thread where a load of blokes talk about what size breasts a woman should have to be acceptable to date.

Lol that’s hilarious . According to stats around 90 percent of men spend their time on porn judging women by their fit and add sizzle me, age , looks etc Don’t tell me they don’t then take these judgements into real life Most of us women spend our whole life being judged on our appearance by men from age 11 or 12 if we develop early !
Hrpuffnstuff1 · 14/02/2022 23:39

@Lpc3

Men have preferences but generally take what they can get. Women have preferences and can generally afford to pick who they want. Who can blame them I'd do exactly the same.
'Men have preferences but generally take what they can get'. Grin

Is that true?

Anothergreatday · 14/02/2022 23:44

According to stats around 90 percent of men spend their time on porn judging women by their fit and add sizzle me, age , looks etc

Oops - judging women by their tits , ass, body size , age and god knows what else…. That should have read

Katie2017 · 15/02/2022 00:41

@linchinton

I've had short partners my whole life and the last one endlessly fat-shamed me when I was size 12. I never was bothered that they were short.

Now I date over 6ft-ers.
It makes ME feel feminine and I love it, I never thought it was important, in fact I thought it would make me feel a bit physically intimidated, but now I'm just not attracted to short guys. I do think my horrible ex has a lot to do with this though.

How horrible of him-glad you got rid and hope he didn't erode your confidence too much. It really is a shame if he put you off short guys though, what were the others like you dated before?
user1481840227 · 16/02/2022 02:42

@roolz

Katie, I'm afraid 5'8 isn't tall, it's a few inches above average. Garr it grinds my gears, sorry. If that's tall, the rest of us above that must be giants then. It's a pretty standard height

Sorry for being pedantic🙈

A few inches is a lot though. The scale isn't that long.

There are women under 5ft and there are women over 6ft but generally they would be considered outliers as they are more rare.

There is the range that most people fall within and within that range people are considered short or tall.

I know lots of women who are 5'1 or 5'2. It's not a rare height by any means and only a 'few inches below average' but they are considered short and they would always call themselves short too.

I'm almost 5'8 and I'm always told that I'm tall.

Anothergreatday · 16/02/2022 03:08

@Classica

Can imagine the outrage if men suddenly decided in their masses they won't date anyone over or under a certain height and suddenly women were getting ignored left right and centre.

Baffled by these people who think men somehow don't also have these kinds of criteria?

Have they met men??

Lol Age , pretty face , slim , curvy , big boobs , small boobs , big ass , no ass, Latino , Swedish , tall, short , blonde , brunette …, does it ever end

Yet god help women if they have ooonnnnnne preference

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 16/02/2022 03:25

I prefer them to be taller than me . I'm 5 7

Hopingforabagofbuttons · 16/02/2022 04:08

There is no right or wrong answer. We all have personal preferences and that’s just how it is. I wouldn’t want to date a guy with long hair or one who was particularly overweight. Nothing against them at all of course , but not something I would be attracted to.

Bussinbussin · 16/02/2022 04:12

@heyyellowyellow

Pre-parenthood, I had a couple of shorter boyfriends, although they were both around 5’7 to my 5’4.

Last week, I went on a date with someone who had already said they weren’t so tall, I didn’t ask as my previous experience was that it didn’t bother me in the slightest. It turned out that he was 5’2 ish… the really odd feeling was though that when we were standing up, each time I caught him out the side of my eye, it felt like I was on a date with my son. I just couldn’t shake it off and can only attribute it to now being a mum. We got on well but the thought of being flirty with him or anything more made me feel really uncomfortable.

I wonder if taller men with daughters feel the same way about you?
Anothergreatday · 16/02/2022 04:31

‘ wonder if taller men with daughters feel the same way about you?

It’s possible they do but considering the amount of men who ACTUALLY want to date girls their daughters age , that probably makes them happy ….

Anothergreatday · 16/02/2022 04:32

Personally wouldn’t care about height ( if I were single which I’m not ) but I think any woman who does has any right to any preference she wants

Spartak · 16/02/2022 04:50

I dated a bloke who told me before we met that he was 5'5" which is the same height is me. He was lying though, I could see over his head, and also his weirdly arranged hair style to cover his bald spot.

He had a normal length torso, but really short legs - he told me his inside leg measurement was 24".

What gave me the ick was that he bought skinny jeans and then took them up himself, so the shape was all wrong, what would have been just below the knee was around the ankle. I know I was being shallow but the final straw was when we went out for a nice meal, and his legs were dangling as his feet didn't reach the floor.

Derelicthome · 16/02/2022 05:17

I once kissed a man shorter than me. As I learnt down to kiss him my hair fell forward and went into my mouth.

Derelicthome · 16/02/2022 05:50

*lent

Derelicthome · 16/02/2022 05:51

*leant
That’s truly embarrassing

Hollyhocksarenotmessy · 16/02/2022 06:11

I think it's really shallow and yes, of course everyone has their turn-ons, but it's no different to a man saying he'd only consider a woman with D cup plus breasts. Does that sound reasonable to those insisting on a certain height?