So you've had a conversation where you've said you want to go through a list of legal ways to safeguard and protect you financially to reflect the fact you've taken a financial hit by providing childcare for your joint children, and to reflect that you're a team and committed... and he's said no?
To be clear, him saying 'don't worry about it, you'd be fine' / 'it's all sorted' etc counts as a no unless he sits down with you, showing you documentation that confirms you are beneficiary of death in service, included in his will, next of kin etc etc.
If you've said all that and he's either fobbed you off or said no then he has no interest in safeguarding your future. You, the mother of his kids.
If you were to split or he passed away, he's willing for you to lose your home and financial security.
He won't even have a sensible conversation as equals about this. You don't seem willing to either tbh, allowing him to fob you off even after this thread, so the relationship just sounds very unhealthy in general.
He views his salary as his money. Your salary as your money. Which would be ok in some relationship but in yours, your salary is only a part time one because you're providing free childcare that means he doesn't need to lose any of his salary. If he can't see that, he's an arsehole or thick. Or both. I think he's an arsehole who knows exactly what he's doing and has protected his financial interests while getting free childcare from you.
That isn't love.