Dating thread 223; Fresh starts and love hearts

[ButterflyOfShay]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

What does "Kuga" mean?

Oh sorry Ford Kuga, it’s my car.
I’ve got a couple of motorcycles as well

Oh Kuga, not Cougar 🤣

Still chatting away to my iron Mr Farmer. Quite refreshing speaking to someone normal.

Well, who doesn’t love a cougar…, but I’m in my 50’s already, so she would have to be 80 or so to make me a “younger guy “

@curmudgeonly007 but if you put this in your profile, what would be left to chat about

Seriously though, when I see comments like "6 foot since that seems to matter," or anything else that's clearly a defensive move, it totally puts me off because it seems so negative and world weary. I'd like to at least maintain a pretense that we are going into this discussion in a fresh and positive way.

@curmudgeonly007

Oh sorry Ford Kuga, it’s my car. I’ve got a couple of motorcycles as well

Never heard of it. I'm going off my car, might look for a new one later this year.

@curmudgeonly007

Well, who doesn’t love a cougar…, but I’m in my 50’s already, so she would have to be 80 or so to make me a “younger guy “

My mum is single......

Ooooh @Bangheadhere40 a farmer… nice! Strong and outdoorsy!!

All of this OLD crap I’ve had as well, the moronic questions. Doesn’t warrant any reply

@Thisisworsethananticpated at least the DD had the the decency to get it touch and you’ve put him to bed now. (Not literally of course) 😆

[quote gelatodipistacchio]@curmudgeonly007 but if you put this in your profile, what would be left to chat about

Seriously though, when I see comments like "6 foot since that seems to matter," or anything else that's clearly a defensive move, it totally puts me off because it seems so negative and world weary. I'd like to at least maintain a pretense that we are going into this discussion in a fresh and positive way.[/quote]
Honestly ( and no offence), I’ve had easier job interviews than chats with prospective irons

Why would this offend me???

I think that I am pretty nice IRL actually, though I will ruthlessly block and delete if someone is a time waster (either by being flaky or by raising any type of red flag).

My mum is single too and nearly 80, likes younger men!

Yeah Mr Farmer seems quite nice and responsive which is refreshing.

I’d love to know what the female pass aggressive profiles are
Men’s include
‘No pen pals’
‘No drama ‘
‘Be honest’
‘Solvent’

Mens ones.. ‘no time wasters’

What does that even mean 😂😂

‘Don’t match and not talk’ but proceeds to match and not talk to you 👀

@Thisisworsethananticpated

I’d love to know what the female pass aggressive profiles are Men’s include ‘No pen pals’ ‘No drama ‘ ‘Be honest’ ‘Solvent’

pretty similar “No time wasters” “No old men” “No creeps” “No Drama” “No beards” < quite common “Must be solvent” “Ask me anything” And my absolute favourite “I don’t message 1st”

I feel like messaging this people saying I’m a 5ft, 80 years old, broke and creepy bloke who just loves to waste time, can you please tell me the rate of rotation of the moon.

I’m pretty sure I’ll get a few dates

@curmudgeonly007 I love that they think ‘no creeps’ will actually deter any creeps. I find it fascinating to hear what OLD is like from a man’s perspective, I assumed female profiles would be a bit more straightforward!

Oh and one more thing Plenty Of Fish should be renamed Plenty of Catfish, soo many awful fake profiles on there

@Gettingonwithit12
I think that’s a hard question to answer, as all I was doing was looking at female profiles so have nothing to compare them to.

It’s not like saying Tesco is better then Sainsburys unless you have been to both shops.

It’s like everything, some female profiles are Great and some are awful and most are in the middle somewhere.
I’m sure there are lots of lovely women on old and I’m also sure there are some women just looking for a meal ticket as well

I must be lucky or living too much of a sheltered life as I’ve never been asked any of the questions that @curmudgeonly007 answered. Think I’d exit the conversation if any of them came up.

@gelatodipistacchio A pet hate of mine is the ‘I like to wear heels so you’d better be tall’ thing. Years ago on the thread I asked about putting height into my profile and the answer then was - yes, absolutely. I was so reluctant to do it that I did it begrudgingly prefacing it by saying personality was more important to me. I did happen to date three women between 5’10 and 6ft tall after that though so maybe I ruled myself into their swipes 🤷‍♂️

@ButterflyOfShay

Mens ones.. ‘no time wasters’

What does that even mean 😂😂

Those are an instant no from me. You just know that they are the ones most likely to waste my time!!

I can’t believe some of the things people put on their profiles (male and female it seems!) Do they actually have any success?

@HairyArsedMan
There were 1st time around when on Tinder & PoCF, those people would get shut down quickly now if anything dodgy comes up.

Height is such a commonly asked question..I’m sure if asked women their chest size the chat would get shut down pretty quickly as well.

@ButterflyOfShay

Mens ones.. ‘no time wasters’

What does that even mean 😂😂

Dunno,

I think the height thing is slightly different to the chest size though. We women can be conditioned to be the smaller partner swamped by your large manly man so when you are a tall woman there can be a fear of looking big or ‘towering over’ your date if he’s not tall.
I never understand why really petite women want really tall men though - think of the neck pain 😁

I’m tallish for a woman and thought I wanted to date a tall man. I was too polite to ask Mr L’s height before our date and ended up with a not v tall quite slim man who I instantly clicked with

@HairyArsedMan

I must be lucky or living too much of a sheltered life as I’ve never been asked any of the questions that *@curmudgeonly007* answered. Think I’d exit the conversation if any of them came up.

@gelatodipistacchio A pet hate of mine is the ‘I like to wear heels so you’d better be tall’ thing. Years ago on the thread I asked about putting height into my profile and the answer then was - yes, absolutely. I was so reluctant to do it that I did it begrudgingly prefacing it by saying personality was more important to me. I did happen to date three women between 5’10 and 6ft tall after that though so maybe I ruled myself into their swipes 🤷‍♂️

Probably proves your point though, that personality is more important - because I'm assuming you're not with any of them now!

I do prefer a man to be taller than me, no idea why. I rarely wear heels so that's not an issue. But despite that, I don't ask about height nor select based on it.