Why do men always suggest going for walks as a first date?

[Marble2021]

This has happened to me a lot. Guys always want to go for a walk as the first date. I completely understand this during lockdown when nowhere is open, but even when we weren't in lockdown and all bars and restaurants were open, they still wanted to go on a walk as a first date. When I suggest meeting at a bar instead, they don't seem to want to. By the way, they are definitely suggesting a date, not just a friendly meet up. Anyone got any ideas as to why they always suggest going to a walk around the streets as a first date?

Valuable. Low effort. [Vom]

I'm not an ornament on a shelf waiting to be picked up by a big spender. I'm a woman looking to meet a man who can keep up, physically sexually and intellectually. I met mine on a walking date a year ago and it was awesome!

I'm surprised that so many people on this thread say they struggle with face-to-face interactions over dinner, maintaining eye contact, conversation etc.

Walk dates are cheap and tacky. I'm embarrassed for women who go on them.

Being 6ft And a very brisk walker I loved being asked for a walk. Not one of my friends enjoys walking with me so since these men had the cheek of asking me out on a skin flint date I put them through their paces by going on a fast walk with lots of up hill climbs and clambering over walls etc. I Didn't hear back from any except the one I'm with now and we are very happy and I have a walking buddy 🤣🤣.
You can very well use it to your advantage if you know somewhere well and you like walking. My partner thinks those who went with me didn't ask ladies on a walk again and are probably traumatised lol.

@PermanentTemporary I felt that way once. Then my life was fucked by marrying a man who turned out to be utterly selfish and cheap, leading eventually to financial and emotional abuse. I made so many excuses and allowances for him, which was fine until we had a baby and I had to rely on him - truly rely on him.

This attitude is not one of a princess, but rather someone who understands that all of us, men included, are inexorably entrenched in the patriarchy. One must judge a man to some extent based on the social norms of patriarchy.

I think walking dates are great, it separates those who actually want to get to know you and those that think it’s “tacky”, the freeloaders

Being 6ft And a very brisk walker I loved being asked for a walk. Not one of my friends enjoys walking with me so since these men had the cheek of asking me out on a skin flint date I put them through their paces by going on a fast walk with lots of up hill climbs and clambering over walls etc. I Didn't hear back from any except the one I'm with now and we are very happy and I have a walking buddy 🤣🤣.
You can very well use it to your advantage if you know somewhere well and you like walking. My partner thinks those who went with me didn't ask ladies on a walk again and are probably traumatised lol.

Love this! Humiliate and emasculate the cheapskates!!

I'd be concerned about the safety element. I would want to meet somewhere where there are people around. A cafe will do.

The free element would also make me thing this is absolute zero cost for him whilst he checks out my body.

They don't want to pay for drinks or food.

(They think they will feel under pressure to pay for any drinks or food).

Some men think women go on dates to get free food and drink. I doubt there are many who do, but they genuinely believe that.

I'm not perfect. Probably the reason I like walking dates is because I'm a snob. My bf suggested we meet at a historic National Trust site for our walk, and brought a thermos of homemade butternut squash and coconut soup he'd made for our picnic. The number of class signals we both managed to pack into that conversation arranging the date was ludicrous.

Also an ex took me to dinner, then to another place for dessert, and to a pub to get drinks. Didn’t mean he wasn’t cheap at all just because he spent that much $. because after that I found out he was bad at managing $ , spent frivolously, had no savings, and only lived in the moment. So just because someone spends money on you it doesn’t mean they are any better than someone that prefers to take a nice sightseeing walk with a cuppa with you.

@Allsortsofroses

They don't want to pay for drinks or food.

(They think they will feel under pressure to pay for any drinks or food).

Some men think women go on dates to get free food and drink. I doubt there are many who do, but they genuinely believe that.

Have you read the thread?

Plenty of proof here they're pretty.mich bang on.

2 people go on a date.
One doesn't pay.
If the one has a cock, he's a cheapskate.
If the one doesn't have a cock, the one with a cock is still a cheapskate.

@Allsortsofroses

They don't want to pay for drinks or food.

(They think they will feel under pressure to pay for any drinks or food).

Some men think women go on dates to get free food and drink. I doubt there are many who do, but they genuinely believe that.

Yeah its hilarious. Like aye mate, she probably spent double the value of the meal shopping for last minute tweaks for her outfit or getting her hair or nails done for the date. But no, of course she is clearly meeting you for the £9.95 buffet at Mr Wu Palace. What a gold digger.

I'd never take anyone pricey for a first date. Or order a 3 course meal at any point in dating tbh. But if he can't even put his hand in his pocket to buy you a friggin coffee...yeah, bye bye.

I don't think men realise how much money women can spend dating.

I mean I'm not a hair and nails and makeup kinda girl but I've defo spent 100 quid on a date outfit in the past. Not for every date of course but maybe for particular ppl I feel really excited about. It's silly of course but just an example that women can spend more than the date cost before the date even happens. Not to mention the effort put in to look our best.

Not to say he couldn't have invested in a back sack and crack too of course. But I disagree with anyone that says dating is always more costly for men. Even the ones who put their hand in their pockets.

But surely you can just wear whatever clothes you have and if you're dating different men, you can wear the same clothes?

I did go on walking dates at my suggestion, especially when the man I was going on a date with had a dog too. We had a really good chat and then went for coffee or a meal.

My boyfriend and I met up in a city and walked, had coffee, had lunch, went to the pub and had a meal. We went halves.

I haven't been on many dates but every time I have paid the second round of drinks, or gone halves.

Teo of my exes were very generous and one ended up constantly in debt living beyond his/our means and another financially abusive, controlling, jealous.

Much prefer my bf who treats me as an equal.

In fact, the best and fairest exes I've had have been the most fair about money, splitting bills etc.

Because they don't want to catch Covid?

No idea!

In my day and in my neck of the woods date was pub. Maybe with a pool table. Maybe local maybe in an area (Camden Islington) where things to do till late if went well.

Walk? No bog? Where? First date wandering around area lots of shrubbery not many people?

Um... No! I mean obviously.

I have arranged to meet chaps in park, during day generally. When date would involve procuring cheap booze with trepidation of underage, and consuming under tree.
Usually met them on the high street first though thinking about it.

Walk?! Need to be v v good at relaxed neutral conversation with someone don't know well/at all. On both sides.

Or deeply uncomfy.

Plus of course even if said yes, I mean heading into great empty outdoors with first date. I wouldn't be totally relaxed and I'm sure many women wouldn't!

Sorry not RTFT.

Very odd, likely to be looong uncomfy silences, not thought of woman possible yikes iffy, bit of a punt putting out there walk when she might not like walks....

Stick to guns OP.
Let's just meet for a drink/ coffee.
Bland, standard.
He says nope?
He's very strange.

(Unless you met at walking group or something!).

Read thread. Blimey!

Dinner first date nightmare. For many reasons one of which is tosser, you stuck.

Not that I have much experience. I would still go for a drink first date do rounds.
What happened to 'going dutch'?

Someone paying thousand quid a month on dinners.
What are you trying to prove?
Fancy restaurant, I'll get dinner etc. Some women like that. Some really put off.
Men who insist on paying for me are the worst. Like, really insist...

Why fancy restaurants £££?

I'd rather go on a walk. Given apparently it's... round the Streets? Wtf!

I mean ok live in place with quirky cobbled streets markets etc.

Bog standard place like loads places are? Up and down high street! Oh it's boots! Again! Smiths next door. Super...

@gelatodipistacchio

I also listen to FDS and I've come around to the view that men should see you as valuable and make an effort - which would mean walk dates are a no. It really is low effort.

I’m another listener of female dating strategy and agree It’s also interesting how many men use this low effort strategy but would certainly be comparing the effort the women who they go on walks with out into their appearance . Doubt a lot of them would choose the low effort female who went in sweats and no makeup over the one who put in a considerable amount ? Even to look ‘casual ‘ for a walk

Plus safety … shows a complete disregard for what women need to consider

Teal sorry I'm really interested. Never heard of female dating strategy.

Is this the new Mars Venus thing?
Women are like this men are like that?
I mean sounds v far removed from real life.

Surely the only 'strategy' for the vast majority of men and women is simple.

See/ meet someone think yep fancy them and seem like my sort of person.

Go date to see if get on. Interesting/ similar sense of humour or interests or outlook/ doesn't think you're a twat, essentially, good time.

See again.

Men and women are just people. Not strategising... In some weird judgement game.

It's really not complicated. Meet. Fancy. Like. Let's do it again!

I genuinely don't get it.

First date with bloke snogged at a house party 19.

Went Islington. He said shit forgot wallet. I said, seriously? Wtf lol. Really or just tight haha.

I got drinks we went club etc.

Together 7 years lived together lovely bloke. Split cos more friends than couple last couple years.

I just don't get this cash looks thing. Normal people aren't trump Melania.

In real life. In the vast vast majority.
First date is about seeing if you get on. If you fancy each other.

Men going on date thinking, fucking gold diggers. And women going on a date thinking. I need to look hot as fuck (what does that even mean? Different people like different things) and assess his potential through cash.

Just how grim. Those people can keep each other. Because their approach is shallow, mired in living by stereotypes.

And imo. Well thinking like that. You're going to end up with someone as suspicious, superficial, calculating as you.

So a good match. But for anyone just... Standard. Majority of population. It sounds really awful.

Rocaille!
You gave me some great advice on another thread so I shan’t leap down your throat !
But my rationale is

If I decide to date again I’ll have to pay for a babysitter , so for a first date keeping it short and sweet works on so many levels
Id never expect a guy to pay first date
50:50
I like walking !
It’s a fast way to filter out if you like them
If you don’t like you leave after walk , and no problems
If you do like you can extend to drinks

I just can’t see the issue here !!!!

@CheeseMmmm

Teal sorry I'm really interested. Never heard of female dating strategy.

Is this the new Mars Venus thing?
Women are like this men are like that?
I mean sounds v far removed from real life.

Surely the only 'strategy' for the vast majority of men and women is simple.

See/ meet someone think yep fancy them and seem like my sort of person.

Go date to see if get on. Interesting/ similar sense of humour or interests or outlook/ doesn't think you're a twat, essentially, good time.

See again.

Men and women are just people. Not strategising... In some weird judgement game.

It's really not complicated. Meet. Fancy. Like. Let's do it again!

I genuinely don't get it.

I don’t know how much of it is strategy Rather smart dating . Sure people are people but men it seems are doing less and less nowadays whilst women do more and more Plenty of expectations still on women when it comes to dating ie women are whether voiced or not expected to look great and this costs loads more . Also the load and risks are higher for women should they get into a relationship with many men expecting ‘equal ‘ as in she works like I do and then the woman still does the lions share or childcare and housework . The stats show time and time again. Women are now expected to die what men do and ALSO the same old stuff they tRaditionally did Sure some men ‘ contribute ‘ , very few do 50/50 So it be hooves women to be smart Why don’t you check it out