Dating Thread 218: The one where we're respectfully selfish

[WeWantTheFinestWines]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@Isitreallyme177 its good to be positive! Just a thought but what about trying some sports clubs or activities where guys might be at? Something like British military fitness, a running club, something like that? Just an idea.

Checking in, thanks for new thread @WeWantTheFinestWines I had a busy eve yesterday and missed the call from @BelladiMamma! What's the status of you and Mr A now Bella?
I think Mr D and I have smoothed things over but it isn't resolved, if that makes sense. The short version is that i think I gave the impression I had feelings/wasn't over exh.
I am, in as much as you can be over an abusive relationship. But I tend to think of it more in terms of 'recovery' and occasionally I am triggered, which was the case this week. I don't feel like I explained myself very well, I do think we both struggle with 'emotion' conversations, but though I wanted to elaborate I was worried I'd keep digging the hole I was in! I think I'll see how it goes f2f.
It's made me reflect on things though, and I'm going back to the compatibility thing. I'm not sure if it's just the knock on effect of ex issues/stressful week or if we need a proper chat. Probably both, when the dust settles.

@Naimee87

You’ve nailed the situation there 100% - if things do go mad again in Europe then hedgehog might prefer to stay with family and work remotely?

And I don’t want a couple months of no dating or intimacy because I’m on a promise for something that might not progress?

Of course I’ll make it very clear I’m interested and up for a date when he’s back but it’s too early for exclusivity or angsty long distance phone-calls.

Plus I don’t necessarily want a sausage fest but also a few nice low key dates out wouldn’t be unpleasant if he’s away for ages?

@Shayelle2009 my sister does British Military fit and she's super fit. I'd die on the first round. 😆 all the classes at the gym seem to be full of women too, I thought there might be some eye candy.

@Isitreallyme177 I genuinely think the gym is the place for you as you sound fit and it must be teaming with men!

In other news my ex spoke to the kids on Facetime and his gf was all over him, I swear to show she's with him. I DONT CARE.

@Eesha the rowing machines are opposite the entrance doors, I get to see everyone who enters when I'm on them. 🙈😆 no wonder I can't beat my personal best in my new gym. Also one of the pt's is hot 🔥. He isn't mine as I doubt I'd concentrate and would probably act all silly.

@Isitreallyme177
there is something about a man who wears shorts over running tights, he was fit though
To wear shorts or not is the big male athleticwear dilemma !

@Eesha
Miss YM1 the same as Miss Sunglasses?
No 2 different ladies, Miss YM1 has been texting me again this morning about booking the booster jab, I'm a bit of a needle phobic and she's been with me for C19 jabs 1 and 2 and held my hand when I had acupuncture treatment for a running injury

Ha 🤣 must be something in the air. My old PT has been in touch and flirting madly, as per. Suggested a FWB arrangement. Yes please 🤣

@Eesha it's good you don't care. Personally I'd feel quite angry but it's great that you're over it.

24 hours without messaging MrA. I was talking to a friend about him today and she was like, calling every day? That sounds needy. Yes maybe there was an element of that ... it's helped put it in perspective ...

Ha 🤣 must be something in the air. My old PT has been in touch and flirting madly, as per. Suggested a FWB arrangement. Yes please 🤣

@Eesha it's good you don't care. Personally I'd feel quite angry but it's great that you're over it.

24 hours without messaging MrA. I was talking to a friend about him today and she was like, calling every day? That sounds needy. Yes maybe there was an element of that ... it's helped put it in perspective ...

@StartingAgain6369 always wear shorts over lycra, I understand the need for lycra but shorts definitely over then 🙈.

@Isitreallyme177
To be honest my lycra running days are gone, long walks now.

I'm meeting up with some friends in an hour to do 7 miles around a local park, then we normally blow all the good work by having a takeaway on the way home

@StartingAgain6369 I've blown all my hard work by eating two Krispy Kreme donuts, I've got one left still to eat🤦‍♀️🤣

Ha 🤣 must be something in the air. My old PT has been in touch and flirting madly, as per. Suggested a FWB arrangement. Yes please 🤣

Must be something in the air indeed, as Ms Business was in touch today,
But she can go fuck right off and Fuck herself

@FabulousMrFifty ouch did I miss something? I hope you are doing okay.

@Isitreallyme177
You've made me feel loads better, I wasn't meant to be in the office today but ended up going in, so started off with Costa caramel latte via the drive thru, I was planning on leaving at lunch but didn't so raided the emergency biscuit store and just had a text confirming takeaway is on for later

@BelladiMamma I find the situation annoying really. He never cheated but I know he speaks highly of me so can imagine that's annoying to her. But being all lovey dovey with small children trying to chat to their dad is stupid. What annoys me is my ex talking down to me when she's there. FUCK OFF (I mouth in my mind).

@Isitreallyme177 we had McDonalds, they deliver for 99p. Don't feel bad. I have a video call later, will chat from waist up.

@StartingAgain6369 I've just had pizza (although it was over cooked so most went in the bin) so the healthy diet is continuing 🤣

@Eesha I haven't had McDonald's for ages their breakfasts are the best.

Since Ms Lithuanian told me there was "no connection", Ms DropDeadGorgeous and I are now in a relationship in which I help her out in her business (for financial reward) and we meet for sex approx twice a week.

New territory for me, but as I am crazy business with work at present time I couldn't cope with much in the way of emotional attachment.

@TobyEsterhase you could do a lot worse than someone drop dead gorgeous!

@FabulousMrFifty, hope you are okay ? If sharing anything on here might help then please do so. Life can feel very complicated sometimes. X

Got a big jar of honey as my darn "It's not COVID just something that makes me ill and cough" hasn't gone away.

Can't open the jar

I need a man....or I think some judiciously applied steam will do it?

PS And no, I'm 100% NOT going to be texting my german beau saying I need his strong hands to open my honeypot.

@SpringlikeBunk hit the side of the lid with a knife