For starters - codeine REALLY doesn't work like that! I'm guessing YOU suggested meds and he played right into it!
He's highly manipulative, controlling and possessive RUN! Block him on EVERYTHING and tell him to stay the hell away!
I'd suggest you read up on future faking, manipulation, mirroring and control as well as shark cages (cos you're missing yours) . He's flying numerous huge red flags.
This in SPADES
Also
Cycle of abuse, love bombing... he's doing it all
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Also look up limerence
You are whole on your own, another person cannot make you so - even if they ARE the perfect person for you that's a deeply dysfunctional approach to relationships in general
At ages of 40 plus this is utterly ridiculous! Plus he will NEVER change at this age - has he ever been in a ltr? Cohabited/married ?
Your heart is not ACTUALLY breaking. You're very upset but that's all you'll get over it.
If abusive relationships are a pattern for you then stay single for at least a year, get some good therapy, do the freedom programme, do an assertiveness course, build your confidence and self esteem
I'm 49 I've been single to all intents and purposes for 20 years almost, I've dated in that time a couple of relationships looked promising but fell by the wayside through nobody's fault but I am perfectly capable and happy being on my own!
It's liberating and empowering.
I'm not currently looking for a relationship but wouldn't reject someone good if they came along either.
What I won't do is put up with crappy treatment, disinterest and most definitely not abuse. Life's too bloody short!
Focus on YOU!
Do things, go places, spend time with people YOU get pleasure from that DOESN'T come with abusive strings!
I'm also the child of an abusive marriage - the kicking off because a text isn't answered immediately is EXACTLY The kinda thing my mum has had to deal with - it's not loving it's control! It's keeping you on a leash! And frankly it took several years before things reached that level of control - this guy is doing it very early on so I dread to thing what he will do that's worse!
Quite honestly I can well imagine him being the type to lock you in your (shared) home when he goes out to prevent you doing anything without him as happened to a this morning viewer.
That's the kind of person her is
As mad as it sounds he's like drug and I'm the addict.
Yep that's limerence NOT love
We don't live together. But he stays 6 nights out of 7.
Even aside from EVERYTHING else you ARE living together, but I take it your saying this means he contributes NOTHING financially or practically?
In addition if you get council tax single person discount you're breaching the terms of that, if you receive benefits on the basis of living alone you're also committing benefit fraud - and it IS you that will suffer the consequences if caught!
I am trying to give a balanced view that he isn't all bad.
Nobody is!
My father could be funny, charming, intelligent, interesting, skilled, an excellent boss at work, a good friend, generous...
He was also aggressive, violent, selfish, sexually abusive, cruel with words, manipulative, controlling, possessive, destructive, miserly and venomous
Put his stuff in black bags on his doorstep! When he's at work! You don't need to see him again at all
Find another hobby group/venue