Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Team Ioan Gruffudd or Alice Evans?

1000 replies

BabyBearRus · 30/10/2021 00:47

I've been following the story around the breakup of Ioan and Alice. I haven't been a great fan of Alice in the past, but I do feel for her and her children right now. Who else thinks that Ioan has behaved atrociously to his family? According to his wife, he has been having an affair for a long while, and making her feel as though she was in the wrong for months.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
28
Bluntness100 · 31/10/2021 14:34

@TheStoic

I was just about to say this is an actual nightmare for them.

Regardless whether it’s work or a holiday, if I was away from my kids at a time like this I’d move hell and high water to get back to them. Literally nothing could stop me trying to get back to my children. Whatever he’s doing, they’re not going to become destitute by him packing up and coming home right now.

Yeah I think if he walks off set and stops filming and breaks his contract that’s exactly what they will be, destitute. They will sue his ass and properly, and he’d struggle to work again.
TheStoic · 31/10/2021 14:35

Honestly, I wouldn’t and couldn’t care.

If the kids are in that much strife, what else can he do?

Bluntness100 · 31/10/2021 14:39

@TheStoic

Honestly, I wouldn’t and couldn’t care.

If the kids are in that much strife, what else can he do?

He still needs to earn, you can’t seriously be suggesting he effectively quits his job, looses his career, gets sued. There’s a full time nanny there and people round the kids. Yes it’s bad, but it’s fool hardy to bankrupt yourself for gods sake.
TheVolturi · 31/10/2021 14:40

We will never know for definite who is actually at fault but I have a soft spot for Ioan so I hope he's not a twat.

TheStoic · 31/10/2021 14:41

I don’t think he’d have to quit. I think his employer would be sympathetic to the situation.

But even if he did, he doesn’t have to act. He can get a regular job, like the rest of us. One close to his kids, perhaps.

Loudestcat14 · 31/10/2021 14:46

I think his employer would be sympathetic to the situation.

TV productions involve hundreds of crew whose livelihoods would be impacted by him quitting, so no, I don't think his employer would be sympathetic to him handing his notice in midway through filming. However, they could possibly shut down for a couple of weeks to give him compassionate leave.

Bluntness100 · 31/10/2021 14:52

@TheStoic

I don’t think he’d have to quit. I think his employer would be sympathetic to the situation.

But even if he did, he doesn’t have to act. He can get a regular job, like the rest of us. One close to his kids, perhaps.

How do you know he’s not already taken time off? In fact it seems he already has from what she’s been posting. And yes maybe after this he will only do uk based roles, who knows, but why the hell should he have to give up his career because his ex wife can’t control herself?
Nyxs · 31/10/2021 15:20

@TheStoic

I don’t presume you would. If you say you don’t post there, I believe you.
So not going to say why you

A thought I believed tattle was the entire world
And
B wanted to know wether I posted there?

LoekMa · 31/10/2021 15:31

[quote Bluntness100]@TheStoic, He’s not on hols, he’s on set working.

I do agree he needs to get back, the issue is Alice is posting that she agreed to a custody agreement and has now renegaded on it. She posted basically fuck the law, the law hadn’t forced her agreement and it was just an agreement between her and him and if she wished to keep her kids extra time over what she had agreed, and past when they were supposed to be with him, she would and fuck him.

Can you imagine a man doing that to a woman? Not handing the kids over as promised? Letting the kids down that way? There would be an outcry.

She’s also posted she gets her twelve year old to “talk her down”. That’s so damaging as well for that young girl.

But she doesn’t work, he pays all the bills Inc for her currently, and he can’t just walk out of his contractual commitments, he’d be sued every which way. The whole thing is a nightmare,[/quote]
This is absolute..gold.

LoekMa · 31/10/2021 15:32

@CrashBank sorry I meant your post. Wonderfully summarized

Original poster
BabyBearRus · 31/10/2021 23:18

Obviously none of us know what really goes on within a marriage. But I really feel for Alice. Her emotions are so raw and on display. And I agree that she needs to have more support from those who are closest to her. But I still stand by my original post about Ioan's insensitivity towards his wife and kids regarding his "new relationship". Given Alice joked previously about how difficult it was to capture her husband smiling on camera...it was incredibly insensitive to her and his children to say that his new girlfriend made him smile again. Huh what about his daughters? Surely your children are always going to be your paramount joy? All seems very odd to me. I hope that Alice can find some closure and peace soon, and move on to pastures new. Just as her ex apparently has done. I'm not anti Ioan, but disappointed that he behaved this way.

OP posts:
bogeythefungusman · 31/10/2021 23:32

AE had problems catching her ex husband smiling on camera but seemed to have no issue capturing his naked or sleeping form and posting the pictures on social media. If someone posted on here that their partner had done the same they'd be told to leave the abusive arse and contact the police.

There's something very 'off' about her discourse.

Original poster
BabyBearRus · 31/10/2021 23:49

bogeythefungusman there's no doubt that she is obviously struggling at times, which reinforces my statement...why on earth would Ioan post something so inflammatory. Putting Alice aside, what about how this all looks to his daughters.

OP posts:
Original poster
BabyBearRus · 31/10/2021 23:52

P.s. surely if he is so concerned by her behaviour, why would he post something on SM that would inflame his ex and which could potentially have an impact on his daughters?

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 01/11/2021 06:38

@BabyBearRus

P.s. surely if he is so concerned by her behaviour, why would he post something on SM that would inflame his ex and which could potentially have an impact on his daughters?
Because he’s famous and going through an acrimonious divorce, he has to reveal it or the paps will do it for him. And I’m sure his children are old enough that they wish him to be happy and were fully aware of the difficulties in the home prior to the split and how unhappy he was. Also why should he hide his relationship for goodness sake.

I think Alice needs to be careful, because there is a good chance he could use her social media activities to go after full custody of the children, there is clearly more behind it than just a woman a year after her relationship ended pissed he’s with someone new, and if it is alcohol then she could be in trouble as her tweets are so all over the place with the story changing regularly with some clearly untrue stuff thrown in.

Of all the stuff that’s been posted on social media, him with his new partner really is the least of it.

Tokyotammy · 01/11/2021 07:51

Baby would you honestly use the word 'struggling' if a man had behaved this way towards his exwife? Your posts come across as very dismissive of abuse.

I'm not saying she should be vilified but neither should we be making excuses for emotional abuse based on her gender.

roofingexpert · 01/11/2021 08:49

I'm not sure you can leave a relationship the perfect way. Someone is always going to be the injured party usually. Given her history on social she doesn't appear to be the sort of person who would have taken it well. Maybe he HAD told her who flipping knows? If she's drinking it could have gone in one ear... she is very obsessed with her looks so this is clearly very painful.

sunglassesonthetable · 01/11/2021 08:56

And I’m sure his children are old enough that they wish him to be happy and were fully aware of the difficulties in the home prior to the split and how unhappy he was. Also why should he hide his relationship for goodness sake.

Ridiculous. The children are way too young for that sort of mature and arms length observation of the situation. It will be all pain and sadness for them.

He doesn't need to hide his relationship, it's how he's chosen to reveal it to his family.

ChequerBoard · 01/11/2021 09:05

*"Ridiculous. The children are way too young for that sort of mature and arms length observation of the situation. It will be all pain and sadness for them.

He doesn't need to hide his relationship, it's how he's chosen to reveal it to his family."*

Actually the pain and sadness will be primarily coming from their mother going postal on social media. If her outward behaviour is this extreme and bizarre, you can bet it's not a picnic being in that house right now. I really hope there are family of staff looking after those kids and trying to insulate them from all this nonsense.

All AE has actually achieved is to draw far more attention and column inches to IGs rather boring Instagram post than would ever have been the case if she had maintained a dignified silence, or even done her raging behind the scenes.

sunglassesonthetable · 01/11/2021 10:12

Actually the pain and sadness will be primarily coming from their mother going postal on social media.

Doubt it. I expect it's really really painful not see your parent for a long time.

ChequerBoard · 01/11/2021 10:18

@sunglassesonthetable

Actually the pain and sadness will be primarily coming from their mother going postal on social media.

Doubt it. I expect it's really really painful not see your parent for a long time.

From direct personal experience, as a child it's far more terrifying being left in the charge of a non-functioning adult that's no longer capable of putting your feelings and needs above their self-pity and desperation to be seen as the injured party.

bogeythefungusman · 01/11/2021 10:29

Plenty of children grow up in households where a parent is absent for long periods, whether that be because they are in the forces, working on oil rigs or cruise ships, working on the other side of the world.

sunglassesonthetable · 01/11/2021 10:29

From direct personal experience, as a child it's far more terrifying being left in the charge of a non-functioning adult that's no longer capable of putting your feelings and needs above their self-pity and desperation to be seen as the injured party.

I'm sorry you had that experience @ChequerBoard

I think it's pointless trying to work out who is causing more pain actually. That's all speculation and supposition.

My point was really in contradiction to what Bluntness said as if the kids would rationalise. the situation so calmly and in should such a benign adult way.

sunglassesonthetable · 01/11/2021 10:30

Plenty of children grow up in households where a parent is absent for long periods, whether that be because they are in the forces, working on oil rigs or cruise ships, working on the other side of the world.

Of course they do!

But context is everything. And the context of this awful.

bogeythefungusman · 01/11/2021 10:35

Well, yes. It depends on the absent parent maintaining as high a level of contact as they can, which it appears IG was doing with facetiming daily, and the present parent supporting the children, which it appears AE wasn't doing, with her reliance on her daughter to 'talk her down'......... And screaming at her ex-husband during his face time conversations with his children.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In
This thread is not accepting new messages.