Dating thread 216 ... spooky fun in cuffing season

[BelladiMamma]

Hi everyone

Can someone else please copy and paste the rules as my screenshot is crap 💩

[quote Shayelle2009]@SpringlikeBunk I wonder if the guy from Sunday is a bit of a cainer and wasn’t in any fit state to meet up? He’s just perking up now so is checking in!
That’s great Hedgehog’s asking when you’re free! Wish I had a nice intelligent German in hiking boots messaging me 🥰[/quote]
That is a REALLY good point

[quote Shayelle2009]@Eesha I’m sure your profile is lovely! It’s not you it’s THEM!! x[/quote]
This ^

@Cocopogo

So I’m giving Mr BMW number 4 a miss. He’s been different since our second date I can only assume it’s because I haven’t put out.

I’ve been chatting to a couple of other guys. One called last night, seemed really normal but after I put phone down he said what’s your favourite colour I told him I wasn’t 12 to which he replied lol well what colour do you paint your nails then? and has now just messaged to ask to call again tonight, which is sweet but I think I’ve got the ick now.

Fgs this annoys me so much. If they want casual and quick then they should have the guts to be honest about it

@Eesha there is probably nothing wrong with your profile and I agree that it's them not you.

Glad things are going along nicely for you @Isitreallyme177

So many cainers out there! Hidden in plain sight 😂😂

Thanks @Shayelle2009 I hope you're doing well? Was the guy at the gym on Sunday?

🙋🏼‍♂️ Question: what’s a cainer ?

Caner - definitionis one who regularly overindulges in drinking or drug taking ?

Thanks @Isitreallyme177 I’m all good. Gym guy isn’t single so that’s a no-goer. I’m glad I know now though than weeks of second guessing! Luckily I didn’t make a twat of myself finding out. Saw him with his missus in the car park! Phew!

@Onesmallstep67 yep. Otherwise known as a wreckhead 😬

Good point @Shayelle2009

Either way I’m going to let it drift - seems ok but not amazing and I don’t really want to be arranging a meet with someone when there’s very little energy both ends to do so? Especially as we’re not an easy distance.

We did chat about meeting on the phone, it feels a bit like he’d agree if I suggested something but all that effort for a coffee which will probably end up as “kind of mates” (when I’m already short on time) just seems pointless?

@naimee87 last weekends ghosted. One of the potentials for this weekend got in touch after 4 days to find out where I live but haven't heard back from him. The other date 0 seems to have also ghosted me.
It is another full on work week for me but I'm hoping things should start slowing down from next week as all my clients are booking things at the moment.

Job hunting wise I am still looking but currently no interviews coming up. Keeping my fingers crossed that something will happen soon

Oh no @Shayelle2009 that's a shame but it gives hope that there are some good ones out there.

@Eesha

Random examples of Ms DDG's rudeness

Criticising me for living in a flat as she says it is cruel for children not to have a garden to play in

Throwing a strop because I didn't get her a lobster (I work in fish factory). I explained it had to be eaten that day and she wouldn't let me take it to her shop.

Speaking very bluntly to waitress when she was upset about slow service.

[quote TobyEsterhase]@Eesha

Random examples of Ms DDG's rudeness

Criticising me for living in a flat as she says it is cruel for children not to have a garden to play in

Throwing a strop because I didn't get her a lobster (I work in fish factory). I explained it had to be eaten that day and she wouldn't let me take it to her shop.

Speaking very bluntly to waitress when she was upset about slow service.[/quote]
Omg. Yuk.

Who cares what her facial features are like, that's a whole heap of entitled ugliness right there

@TobyEsterhase the blunt talking would ruin it for me there. I hate rudeness. Actually my beautiful friend is exactly this way, talks to shop assistants like they are dirt. It really takes the shine off her looks

@TobyEsterhase

Agree I'd just cut her loose - no discussion just don't be in touch? Did you pay for the meal?

Maybe have another swiping session as none of these contacts seem to be what you want!

I agree it can be tough and draining on the apps (especially now it's dark and cold) but I think being willing to just clear out the duds and start again can be quite invigorating.

I hate rude people, having done bar work and shop work in the past I've dealt with my fair share of rude people. They never got the service they wanted after being rude to me.

There’s no excuse for rudeness but I think the throwing a strop would do it for me. What exactly are you attracted to?

@Shayelle2009

I know it's "so far so good", he seems very respectful of timing and my schedule so just looking forward to (hopefully) catching up when I'm back.

As you probably saw from my posts over the late summer/early autumn I was a bit disheartened by the apps

so just meeting someone I really chime with physically and mentally (first one too!) is good for me, feels like there is a point doing the sifting through!

Yes I think I need to get better at sifting. I always think there’s no point wasting time “chatting” and might as well go straight to date part and see if there’s a connection but faffing around getting ready and going out in winter just for him to be a drip isn’t appealing at all either

[quote TobyEsterhase]@Eesha

Random examples of Ms DDG's rudeness

Criticising me for living in a flat as she says it is cruel for children not to have a garden to play in

Throwing a strop because I didn't get her a lobster (I work in fish factory). I explained it had to be eaten that day and she wouldn't let me take it to her shop.

Speaking very bluntly to waitress when she was upset about slow service.[/quote]
Instant bin for me, sorry.

@Cocopogo

Snap - it's such a difficult balance isn't it?

I was thinking for a while to chat on the phone a few times first, build up a bigger picture before meeting IRL. To save time like you say.

But then again, it's often easier to screen from a first meet - you can tell more from their behaviour in person, if they turn up on time and are easy to schedule in with...like the guy I'm ditching from Sunday seemed Ok on chat and over call, but not that good when the meet is there...

And with MrHedgehog who I'm really enjoying (even if things don't progress) he messaged the day after we made contact on Bumble to suggest he came to meet for a drink before he went on conference.

No time for screening although he has work profiles online and of course met in a busy place etc.

So I could have made a judgement that he was pushy or a hookup guy as he wanted to meet so soon.

but he just happened to be fairly enthusiastic (I don't think I have a stunning model profile, he's quite a friendly guy so was probably taking a chance on a random night out) which was nice.

It is a LOT harder wanting to go out in this weather as well to meet a stranger as well!

@Cocopogo

Yes I think I need to get better at sifting. I always think there’s no point wasting time “chatting” and might as well go straight to date part and see if there’s a connection but faffing around getting ready and going out in winter just for him to be a drip isn’t appealing at all either

Coffees are the way forward! With something that you want or need to do, tacked on. Like a school run, in my case, or a dog walk or errand.