Dating thread 216 ... spooky fun in cuffing season

[BelladiMamma]

Hi everyone

Can someone else please copy and paste the rules as my screenshot is crap 💩

@Shayelle2009 I hope you dodge the rain showers today!

@Eesha I have a few which I've bought over the years. They're all in black! This one has sleeves to the elbow and is in black crepe style material. The others are a bit lightweight for this time of year. I'm a little concerned that whatever I wear I'll turn up looking like a drowned rat! I'll have to take a change of clothes 😁. I'm also really worried about coming back smitten as his conversation has become full of signals about 'the sort of people we are, we are so alike, the kind of woman I want to commit to' etc and I don't know if I'm imagining it or not. I think he's 'trying out the idea of us being committed in his head' so his conversation goes back to that. Sort of relationship mentionitis. But it's early early days and getting time together has been a challenge, so ... who bloody knows eh. I am enjoying it though.

@VanGoghsDog I'm in a bit of a pickle about it. Unlike MrAccountant who I didn't fancy much at all and was no loss, this guy had the potential to be a good FWB. He's cute. Lives nearby. Discreet and can cook. The bonus is we can also speak in French or Italian as he's fluent in both and I always enjoy that. What to say? Ask him not to talk about politics? Not go any further with him because I don't want to hang out with someone who basically just told me to my face I shouldn't be paid the same as men for the same work because I'm structurally different? And if so how to explain it to someone who's clearly closed minded and relies on YouTube for his information? 🤦🏻‍♀️

My date 0 for tonight never made firm plans and when I went to bumble this morning he was gone.

Morning all, I'm feeling very proud of myself for blocking someone instead of waiting for excuses or it being flipped round on me. Was a potential FWB been chatting a couple of weeks and I said no to something and didn't like his response. Sounds normal, but for me who has been in an abusive marriage this is a really big step for me. And growth that is defo needed for OLD!

Really helps reading through your posts and I have a couple of mates to sound stuff out too but I've never dated in my life so learning stuff I should have 30 years again

@JustAnother0ldMan Some of us in East Anglia are meeting in Colchester this Sunday.

Oh ffs @Dancerinthemoonlight, why do these people do this ? Such a waste of everyone’s time and energy. Onwards and upwards, we’ve all come too far to let that rubbish stop us in our tracks

@pinkfondu, well done on asserting your boundaries. It feels good to take control and put your needs and expectations at the fore.

Hope you have a great weekend @BelladiMamma. I know that Mr Actor made a significant impression upon you and has continued to capture your thoughts. Enjoy it. These special times with someone who you feel a connection with don’t come along all the time so embrace it.

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards So pleased for you! That's amazing!
@Dancerinthemoonlight sorry to hear, guess not at all worth your time though.
@JustAnother0ldMan i would tend to agree with you there! Hope you found your glasses! 😂

Congratulations @OnwardsEverStridingOnwards, fantastic news. You must be super proud of yourself x

@Shayelle2009 i'm in need of a night out! My friends been doing 'sober-october' and we used to have such fun prosecco evenings before, so only 2 days to go! yay!
Hoping you have a great time! 👏🏻🍾

Congratulations @OnwardsEverStridingOnwards

Moving “to the next level” with work and study is such a big source of emotional fulfilment, it really is.

Jealous of all the guys meeting it’s just a little bit too far for me and I’m away again soon.

Speaking of going away.

How bad is covid prevalence right now?

Possibly intercepting someone vulnerable and though I’m testing frequently, double-vaxxed and semi isolating before I travel want to make the best decision in terms of keeping my distance. Bit worried I might be a silent carrier.

@SpringlikeBunk

Congratulations *@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards*

Moving “to the next level” with work and study is such a big source of emotional fulfilment, it really is.

Jealous of all the guys meeting it’s just a little bit too far for me and I’m away again soon.

Speaking of going away.

How bad is covid prevalence right now?

Possibly intercepting someone vulnerable and though I’m testing frequently, double-vaxxed and semi isolating before I travel want to make the best decision in terms of keeping my distance. Bit worried I might be a silent carrier.

Just had to look into this myself.

If you have no symptoms and you're continuing to take LCF on a regular basis, that's the best protection you can afford your vulnerable contact

shayelle Yes got some nice bits though have to return some (bloody fitting room situation means have to get sizes 6-10 and then try at home for then return !).

I wanted to suss out the vibe/commute/warmth levels at new work before getting new stuff and although I’m mainly ok with what I’ve got few extras were nice! There’s a lot more black being worn in my new city and a lot more sports casual stuff.

@pinkfondu

Good for you for acting on your instincts. You can say no to anyone for any reason and you don’t need to explain yourself (especially if you’re just online texting)

@Dancerinthemoonlight

Annoying! More men in cuffing season but also significant proportion of them still tinewasters (alongside the usual creeps and degenerates)

@Onesmallstep67

Hope you have a great weekend *@BelladiMamma*. I know that Mr Actor made a significant impression upon you and has continued to capture your thoughts. Enjoy it. These special times with someone who you feel a connection with don’t come along all the time so embrace it.

Thank you ♥️

That's basically been the tone and content of a lot of what he's been saying. But, feet firmly planted on floor. And occasional flights of fancy.

@pinkfondu this is a great feeling especially after you've been in that sort of relationship/marriage. I'm two years out now, after twenty, and I feel so much lighter and happier and importantly - secure in my own boundaries.

@Dancerinthemoonlight well, all I can say is, he's saved you some time, money and energy. What a codswallop.

Ahem. Still talking to BeardFlake. Asking him what was in his head and where he's at now. Same old. Not going back there really ... just checking in whilst I feel strong enough. The tricky thing will be if MrActor also disappears and then will I go back to BeardFlake for fantasy comfort?

[quote SortingItOut]@JustAnother0ldMan Some of us in East Anglia are meeting in Colchester this Sunday.[/quote]
@SortingItOut
Oh, as a Norfolk boy do I qualify?
Unfortunately in Wales till Monday
Are there many meetings, is it AA or more like Fight Club ?

@BelladiMamma what went wrong with Mr Beardflake?

[quote Eesha]@BelladiMamma what went wrong with Mr Beardflake?[/quote]
I don't honestly know other than he kept flaking after making really elaborate arrangements 🤷🏻‍♀️

Bella if someone mansplained my job to me I would not see them again. It's arrogance and misogyny fuelling ignorance and it's a toxic combination that will manifest in other areas of their personality eventually. I have zero tolerance for toxic masculinity and I will probably be single forever. So definitely listen to your gut, not mine! And enjoy Mr Actor who will surely have little time to appreciate your outfit before it's off! 😊

onwards congratulations! You must feel such a huge sense of achievement 💐

heartbeats I'm rooting for you and saving up for a new hat 😉

In other news, I barely qualify to be on this site as I've paused all the apps and have no irons on the go - but I know I'll be back because I do want to meet someone who can live up to my impossible standards and I've seen it happen on here and irl so I can't lose hope.

@WeWantTheFinestWines that's just it, and I was slightly thrown as he presents as non conventional, cool and an open type of person. Actually told me several times over our two dates that he is really open and liberal. So that's clearly the way he thinks he is. But I literally wanted to turn around and walk away from Him as he started on about this fucking YouTube thing he'd watched about how women were structurally different. He then banged on about black history month and how it wasn't helping anyone. It was extraordinary, just like listening to MrAccountant except with a nose ring and a more handsome face

MrActor just asked me if I was seeing anyone else. When I said no he replied 'good' and then the conversation carried on as normal is filth, flirtation, swapping notes on films we've both seen and food and travel etc etc

Jeez I'm going to explode with anticipation and what ifs unless I keep myself very very grounded.

The fact is, I'm not ready to have an exclusive conversation with him. So if he does with me, I'll have to be very careful how I answer

@BelladiMamma are you hoping to become exclusive with MrActor? Or would you rather remain a free agent?

Thanks @Naimee87! The rains stopped and the sun’s come out!! The train is completely jam packed #CovidFest

@BelladiMamma well it certainly sounds like you have amazing mutual chemistry with Mr Actor.. I really hope that you can just continue to enjoy your connection with him! I sometimes wish the brain would bugger off when there's something good going and allow us to experience without overthinking!

@JustAnother0ldMan sounds like your weekend is going extremely well, congrats!

@Dancerinthemoonlight what a dickhead. At least you didn't waste an outfit on him as I'm sure he would have been a dead end if he's rude enough to vanish like that.

Hope all enjoy the meet up!

I've deleted MrBody's number so I can't message him...he seems to still want to see me but I've definitely done enough chasing up now. Will leave it with the universe!
Got a coffee date zero tomorrow afternoon with MrBank, he's similarly new to dating, has kids, finds the whole online dating thing draining too I think. Seems handsome and intelligent from pics and chats, will see.
Now going to put my phone in a drawer so I don't keep pathetically checking to see if MrBody has messaged 😬 and go and have a productive afternoon!

Well Mr Cricket has got back to me and says the cinema sounds good. Thats actually only a week away so will fly by.

@MizK @Stayingstrongish I'd rather remain a free agent. And now I'm wondering if he's asked me because he's seeing other people. I know he's still checking in on Feeld as it gives the last time someone was active so actually - bucket of cold water time. We met for a casual thing, we are having a casual non exclusive thing but it just so happens that the chemistry is a bit more than easy come easy go casual. The thought of being in a committed relationship actually makes me feel slightly sick so what's good for me has to be good for him too. I'm not kidding myself about anything here ... although obviously there's a part of me that would love to be swept off my feet