The Spookster

[spook]

Hi girls.Can't post on that one so it'll have to be this one!!! Phew-close one.

I wonder why you can't post on that one? Very very weird...

MN can be very quick when they need to be, can't they! Are you OK, anyway? Shall we give up the demon drink?

You now have three threads up for your perusal!

Ooh I forgot you couldn't post on there. Curious.

Hi Spook. When are you next due to see your solicitor? Can you contact them to find out how to market the house without constant cancelling of your instructions by dick the prick?

Oh and now might be a good time to change the locks, just to reinforce the message that this is not his family home.

This just gets better and better. He has contacted the estate agent. Said he won't sell the house for any nore than a .75% fee and he doesn't want a board or any advertising. FFS!
We are on the high street and it is a beautiful house. No board no viewers.No advertising no sale. What a complete smeghead.

oh for gods sake!! so what is happening?

Is the sign up or down?

Get your solicitor involved. If he keeps interfering, you can apply to the court for an order relating to the sale and he won't have any control whatsoever.

Unfortunately my solicitor is away till next week (ain't that always the way) The sign is down but I have told her in no uncertain terms that I want the sign up.

If your solicitor is away, s/he should have a colleague covering their work. Could you ask to speak to the colleague just for some immediate advice on how to deal with his interference?

The estate agents must be loving this one. At least, when the house is sold, it will be one occasion where the agents actually earned their percentage .

So is she honouring your word and carrying it out or giving the wank stain air time?

heave just mailed him. Is there any reason why you want no board and no advertising when we are trying to sell the house? Next thing you'll be telling them no viewers.

Absolutely to the point.

Does seem a rather novel approach to trying to sell a house

Hi Spook. I never post on these threads. But, if I remember correctly you are the one who's w*nker husband walked out on you and kids for some bimbo at work... Oh I hope I got that right.

Anyway, did he say you can't put the sign "up". I think that could be interpreted as the in the fron garden. Why don't you stick it in the window? And, why do you need his approval? Just do it. What judge is going to fault you for trying to sell your own house by the usual means?

Ummm, what have I missed then?? What happened to the other thread?

His response...

I want the sign but no advertising until after the first week as we may not need it.
I will forward what I sent to them.

I have spoken to my accountant and solicitor about the forms, sale etc and this is
the upshot:

Your people will want up to date accounts. These will be done to May 04 by Nov 22
but will not be done to August for at least a month.

Once I have the May figs from the accountant I can fill the rest of the forms in. They
all need to be as up to date as possible which is why the accounts are first.

According to the solicitor, no money from any house sale can be distributed until there is
a settlement agreement. If this is not agreed amicably then it will go to the courts to decide.

It is therefore not feasable to put the house on the market (or at least agree a sale) until
the settlement agreement is in place.

I suggest we get the settlement agreed and then put the house up for sale straight after
Christmas.

I am not trying to control or delay things, this is just the way it is.I will do it as quick as I can.

What time shall I pick the lads up tomorrow?

Delaying tactics, delaying tactics, delaying tactics....

He really is one of those 'can't do' people, isn't he?

my response...

Absolutely no way. The house will stay on the market. If I have to rent until the settlement is agreed then so be it. I will not put my life on hold anymore. You have held up those forms for 6 months. No more.

spook WELL DONE! Stick with it girl....

Well done. Of course you can sell the house - and rent if you have to. Chances are that the actual process of selling the house will take you through to an agreed settlement anyway. You have a rough idea of what the house is worth, so your solicitors can work on those figures and do any adjustment at the end if the eventual sale figure differs drastically.

Be warned that he may try to drag the whole process out even further. Final financial settlement cannot be agreed until the question of residency is decided. Clearly at the moment you are both agreed that the boys should live with you. However, if dick the prick wants to make life difficult, I wouldn't put it past him to apply for residency just to string the whole process out further - and that could take up to a year to resolve.

It might be a good idea to let him believe that you have abandoned the idea of moving far away, so that he goes through with the divorce, residency, etc. without causing further waves. There's nothing to stop you moving once all that has been agreed. Just a thought.

Spook - just in case he does decide to apply for residency, as Freckle has just outlined. Do you still have the email (or was it text) he sent you a day or so ago where he says you are @a good mother'.

If so save it - it might be a very good trump card should he start alleging you are a drunken bum who mistreats her children. You never know what rabbits he'll pull out of the hat - the arse

Hi guys. Have just been for a walk and thinking all this through. I am starting to get a little bit upset now rather than triumphant. I remember when all this kicked off sitting in the lounge with him joking about who got which piece of art. And ha said "well it's never going to come to that is it" I just can't believe what it has come to. This is the man who insisted he would never fight any financial issues-he's not that type of a man. This is the man who was supposedly my soulmate,who I had 2 beautiful children with.
And he's now saying-should we disagree on the settlement it will have to go to court. How does this happen???Is it guilt on their part that turns me into the monster??
Will someone PLEASE point out to me what I have done in the last 10 months for us to have come to this. OK so I yell at him sometimes (yesterday quite alot) but isn't that what anyone would do in my position?? He just sees me losing my rag as the very reason he fell out of love with me in the first place. But who wouldn't yell a bit after putting the house on the market after all this time and then seeing the sign has come down behind your back??/
It's like I need to break through this bastard that he has become and find the man that I know lurks there aomewhere. I am going to end up hating him and what good is that for my sanity and my memories and my children As you can see I'm starting to get upset now.
Yes, I've kept all correspondence. The ones where he admits responsibility,the ones wherre he said OK sell the house and the ones wherre he says I'm a good mother.

Message deleted

Oh spook - you haven't done anything to cause it all.

Separation/divorce brings out the worst in people