Dating thread 209: Summer of Love 2021

[BelladiMamma]

I've put a screenshot of the RULES here

Dear newbies and oldies they're excellent words of wisdom and deserve to be read frequently

Here's to all of us navigating the sea of twats, the tsunami of penpals and the ever receding tide of ghosters

Let's kick them into touch and have a summer of love ❤️

@Shuffleuplove

I have a question re dates.

Planned date zero for Sunday, venue sorted but need to confirm time. Lots of texts about how nice it will be, not long to go etc.

But, not heard off him since a very short text on Wednesday. How long do I give it before I book myself up for something else? I don’t want to send a “are we still on for Sunday” type thing as it’s been me that’s initiated contact the last few times.

Thoughts please!

@Shuffleuplove for what it's worth, once a dates been set up to meet I always go a bit quiet too. I've achieved my objective and don't want my imagination to go into overdrive with the texting. So it's not necessarily a bad thing

I think sending a quick text today confirming the details would be fine.

@Iamclearlyamug

Just got back from date zero with mr Kia. Nice guy, very polite but absolutely no spark - pretty sure he felt the same. Onwards and upwards 🤷‍♀️

@Iamclearlyamug 😐 Ah well, it's easier when you know straight away. You know when you know.

@troobleflooble

Well, I have an update on Mr Metal..

I've come off the apps..and he has too! 😂

I realised, ahead of our third date the other day, that I had completely lost interest in talking to any of my other irons. I also found myself being really excited about seeing him again and even though I was a little worried he might think it too soon, I thought all I can do is just be honest and lay my cards on the table. So I told him all of that and he felt the same. I went to delete my apps this morning and noticed that he has already done it 😆

Our third date was pretty simple as I was only on a break from work so we went for a nice walk. We kissed again and he held my hand 😊

Not sure if this makes him Mr M now? I've told him that I'm totally fine with not putting a label on things yet and just getting to know him, so we aren't 'official' but we are exclusive if that makes sense?

I'm so happy but also slightly terrified 😬

Great news @troobleflooble 🥰 sounds like you're both on the same page. Enjoy x

@SpringlikeBunk

Walk or coffee scheduled in with MrC

(Not really sure what’s going to happen but might be flirty. We shall see!)

@SpringlikeBunk hopefully it will be flirty 🙏🙂

@troobleflooble great update :)
@Shuffleuplove I wouldn't assume he's going quiet - some people just slow down the messaging once a date is confirmed. I was chatting to a mate the other day and she said once she confirmed the plans she didn't message at all - in fact he messaged to see if it was still on!

So I sent an opening message to 4 of my matches... And nothing. Am chatting to one match who messaged first, but not sure we're that compatible. I'm also away in a different city a long way from home - the men are much better here which is frustrating 😂

@Shuffleuplove, another one agreeing that there’s nothing wrong with checking in with your date about setting a time. I’d probably give it until lunch/mid afternoon today and if no word send a text saying something along the lines of ‘ hi just sorting out my weekend plans and realised we haven’t set a time for Sunday, what works best for you?’

Met with Mr Italy last night for our 2nd (or 1st?!) date, it went really well and are meeting next Thursday again. We got on really well and he surprised me by being on the same page as me on a particular women's issue, he was way more knowledgeable than I thought and I was so impressed. I fancy the pants off him.. Trying to take it slow though, I dont want to get attached this early obviously.

Have got a new match who sent me an opening "❤️" which is obviously really lame but better than the other 8 who haven't sent anything? So will give him a little go..

@Bbub @SpringlikeBunk hope all continues to go well 🤞🏽

I am in such a good place right now. I've had a great week with friends and family, starting to feel better after my accident & got paid by a client who'd owed me money for 2 years!! It's actually enough money to pay for some building work yay Fucking yay 😁 and my ex hadn't put it in the financial settlement so it's mine, all mine 😁 (apart from some that had to go the revenue).

BeardFlake and I are still messaging lots and I kind of don't care about the situation anymore. I've put it in a box and it's not going to upset me for my date zero's. He's moving to Scotland 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 which was part of the flake / depression / I don't do relationships thing. I've now firmly set my boundaries in place with him and within that space I'm finding lots of opportunities for us to have a really fun interaction. He's single, not dating at all - I'm single and dating and I feel like I can get what I want out of him. Which is flirting, talking about our shared hobbies and generally getting these cracking voice notes from him sounding like Daniel Craig.

[quote BelladiMamma]**@Bbub* @SpringlikeBunk* hope all continues to go well 🤞🏽

I am in such a good place right now. I've had a great week with friends and family, starting to feel better after my accident & got paid by a client who'd owed me money for 2 years!! It's actually enough money to pay for some building work yay Fucking yay 😁 and my ex hadn't put it in the financial settlement so it's mine, all mine 😁 (apart from some that had to go the revenue).

BeardFlake and I are still messaging lots and I kind of don't care about the situation anymore. I've put it in a box and it's not going to upset me for my date zero's. He's moving to Scotland 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 which was part of the flake / depression / I don't do relationships thing. I've now firmly set my boundaries in place with him and within that space I'm finding lots of opportunities for us to have a really fun interaction. He's single, not dating at all - I'm single and dating and I feel like I can get what I want out of him. Which is flirting, talking about our shared hobbies and generally getting these cracking voice notes from him sounding like Daniel Craig. [/quote]
Great about the client paying up!! And who doesnt want to hear Daniel Craig style voice messages!!

I have a date!! Spoke to Mr Ireland on the phone, but he’s not Irish so his name now doesn’t go 😂. I suggested a short chat, 2 1/2 hours later he was still going, so at least I know we can keep a conversation going.
I agreed to meet halfway on the date, but he said no he will come my way. He’s googled and found a nice pub (he could have just asked me to suggest, but did all the led work), so meeting him Saturday night.
What does everyone wear? It’s a pub with a beer garden. I always get the vibe wrong, either under or over dressed

@Bbub

Met with Mr Italy last night for our 2nd (or 1st?!) date, it went really well and are meeting next Thursday again. We got on really well and he surprised me by being on the same page as me on a particular women's issue, he was way more knowledgeable than I thought and I was so impressed. I fancy the pants off him.. Trying to take it slow though, I dont want to get attached this early obviously.

Have got a new match who sent me an opening "❤️" which is obviously really lame but better than the other 8 who haven't sent anything? So will give him a little go..

@Bbub he sounds great ☺

I imagine it is quite hard to keep plugging on with the other potentials when you've found someone you like, fancy and is keen to see you again.

Is the consensus on here that it's best to keep doing that until you've had the "are we exclusive" chat?

Date number 2 with MrMud tonight. Weather is looking dreadful, grey, rainy and cold so might not be up for a beach walk or sitting outside to have a drink as was the plan. But we shall see what happens, I'm less anxious this time having met already, not sure what to talk about though as we have been messaging loads recently.
I shall debrief you all later...

@Mylifestartstoday

I have a date!! Spoke to Mr Ireland on the phone, but he’s not Irish so his name now doesn’t go 😂. I suggested a short chat, 2 1/2 hours later he was still going, so at least I know we can keep a conversation going. I agreed to meet halfway on the date, but he said no he will come my way. He’s googled and found a nice pub (he could have just asked me to suggest, but did all the led work), so meeting him Saturday night. What does everyone wear? It’s a pub with a beer garden. I always get the vibe wrong, either under or over dressed

Jeans with a nice top x

Lots of positive updates today

I decided to give bumble a go last night. A few swipes in & I find my on/off FWB, Mr Gym. His profile says he's looking for a relationship which is not what he keeps telling me. So I think we're going to have to have a talk.
I don't mind our casual arrangement but not if he's sleeping with other women and telling them he's looking for something long term.

I've deleted the app now. I only found 2 men I wanted to swipe right on. The rest were just grim.

In other news, I spoke to a real person today. My postman 🤣

Oh in real life news... I got a smile from a very sexy scaffolder this morning, I was so shocked I just nervously looked away before I realised I should have just smiled back [bangs head on wall]. I'm rubbish at flirting

@Mylifestartstoday

I have a date!! Spoke to Mr Ireland on the phone, but he’s not Irish so his name now doesn’t go 😂. I suggested a short chat, 2 1/2 hours later he was still going, so at least I know we can keep a conversation going. I agreed to meet halfway on the date, but he said no he will come my way. He’s googled and found a nice pub (he could have just asked me to suggest, but did all the led work), so meeting him Saturday night. What does everyone wear? It’s a pub with a beer garden. I always get the vibe wrong, either under or over dressed

@Mylifestartstoday I try and wear something I'll feel comfortable in.

Last date- maxi skirt, white trainers, vest top, denim jacket. The one before- fitted shirt, jeans, white trainers.

I don't wear much makeup but always lipstick and perfume, because they make me feel good, whatever the outcome of the date.

@BelladiMamma ooh the Daniel Craig voice notes sound sexy 😍

@Mylifestartstoday that's exciting about Mr Ireland (I gave my iron Mr Italy a somewhat incorrect name too 😳😂) I second Bella with jeans and a nice top, there's lots of scope there to dress up or down and accommodate the weather... That's my go to anyway

@Languidleopard yes it really is hard! I've got no interest in going to the effort of meeting up for a date with anyone else now! Going to keep swiping so I'll at least have some matches to fall back on if it goes tits up!

@EchoElephant is the postie fit? 😍

@Onesmallstep67 I messaged him and he messaged straight back so back on! 🌟

[quote Shuffleuplove]@Onesmallstep67 I messaged him and he messaged straight back so back on! 🌟[/quote]
So Pleased to hear this!

We can self sabotage sometimes. I often forget that other people don't have their phones with them all the time, don't message during work hours etc

Hope it goes well 🤞🏽

@Bbub I couldn't really say. I'm old enough to be his mother 😆

@Shuffleuplove, that's great. His swift response bodes well. Is this date zero? let's hope there's a spark IRL. This is an update I will be looking out for.

Yes it’s date zero and some furious masturbation has meant I’ve caught feels.

Shuffleuplove

Yes it’s date zero and some furious masturbation has meant I’ve caught feels

🤣🤣

😂😂 shuffle

My date for Monday has impressed me. Messaged yesterday nice chats, said he is working nearish would I like meet next week. Offered to meet nearer to me and booked it all - makes a pleasant change from Mr TG when I had to instigate every single date.
I don’t think it’s going to go anywhere but he seems nice and it’s a change from love island