[quote SpringlikeBunk]@BelladiMamma
At a temp workplace a few years ago, a consultant from outside came in (late 40's, tall, nice face, into sports, never been married or kids, financially successful)
He actually was interested in me (cradle snatcher) and I thought he was masculine and attractive, but I was coming out of an abusive relationship and my MH was very poor so not dating.
What really struck me, was how he was seen as "social hot property" by a lot of the women there?
How much "social work" they were doing for him? Can't imagine the same thing happening for a successful woman his age.
It just showed up societal sexism - I'd have loved to have made some platonic friends but I found women there who were "just too busy" for a coffee with me or other women, were chasing him round with offers of city tours and drinks and all sorts?
He had his "sexual pick" of some women who offered to host him and let him do "cocklodger lite" when posted in our city, and wanted to do all the mental load for him.
So if that dynamic is on the apps, then no wonder guys get so lazy![/quote]
This is so interesting. My ex used to work away a lot and very occasionally I'd get invited to events at the places he'd been working. It was quite clear that he had an entourage of women who were enabling and supporting him to have the cushy lifestyle he had at home, whenever he worked away.
There'd usually be one or two women who'd become quite proprietorial over him and would be very frosty or avoid me. Or a very welcoming person, often a woman, who'd be very nice to me but at pains to tell me how hard he'd been working and how much they'd been helping him.
I think it had a lot to do with the fact he was generally there to hire and fire, invest money etc. People would fall over themselves for them.
I realise it's quite possible that he was having affairs with those women who were frosty / wierd with me.
But in any case, men seem to have a ridiculous amount of social currency and power. I've seen female ceos and investors command it, also Hollywood actresses. But I know they've had a lot of crap along the way too.