I’ve just messaged the OWs husband

[The6thQueen]

Found out she’d called my husband again and asked him to set up another email account for them to talk. We’re over
But I’ve just forwarded her husband all their WhatsApp messages and images of her in the shower. Apparently she hadn’t told him the full story and they are starting IVF again shortly.
Im shaking and feel like a bitch, but I want her to hurt (and my stbxh) to hurt like I and my children are

@The6thQueen I was in your shoes 10 years ago, I can still remember the excruciating pain & fury I felt. I remember wanting him to stay, I remember feeling I couldn't do it, that I'd never manage alone. The betrayal broke me at the core.

Like me, you will get past this. You will realize you are better off without the lying piece of shit your husband is, that you can be happy and that crucially you never really were happy with him. Focus on your children & yourself.

FWIW - I was the last to find out, the OW's husband knew before I did. I still wish someone had had the decency to tell me. You did the right thing telling her husband.

Good for you, I would have done the same.

I would have sent the pictures too.

I don't know how you could get in trouble for sending he husband pictures of her in the shower? You havent posted it on social media and I'm assuming hes seen his wife naked before.

GOOD

@The6thQueen

You've
Done the other woman's husband the biggest favour ever he should be thanking you

It is a horrible situation but as time goes on you'll realise you've done the right thing

You will feel better one day.

Hang in there. One day at a time.

Please ring Samaritans if you need someone to talk to.

Ok what's the difference here between a poster a few months ago who found out the guy she was online dating was married and forwarded the messages to his wife, and this situation? The poster several months ago was pilloried and the OP here supported, in general.

Fwiw I support both of them but I'm curious.

@Sandra15

Scale of pain could come into it, I think.

Partly how people write, @Sandra15, two different people can write about the same situation in different ways and get two completely different responses.

Also there's a degree of luck in what responses you get, one or two unsympathetic ones can set the tone for a whole post.

And some people love putting the boot in.

I have no idea if he read them or not. I decided for my sanity to walk away from all that. I deleted the message groups (not the messages themselves, just on my account) and blocked them both. I was becoming consumed with hurting her like she hurt me. I’m not that person and nor is my relationship

I'm glad you've realised that. It was natural to want to lash out but you're right it won't help your mental health. How are you doing now?

She gave an update here:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/4295586-6thqueen-cheating-thread?msgid=109447744

Taking it one day at a time @cakecakecheese

@Handsoffstrikesagain

I completely agree with forwarding the messages (she sounds like a complete cow), but with regard to private pictures of her in the shower, you could land yourself in some kind of legal trouble for that. Has he seen them? If not, delete them off WhatsApp.

I work in criminal defence and this is absolutely right. It's a criminal offence and if she makes a complaint to the police you're going to find yourself in court.

small steps towards a better future