Dating Thread 206 - picking up tradesmen aswell as dates

[Dancerinthemoonlight]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

[quote Naimee87]@Slothmomma wow impressive being a single mum to three and getting a course on the go! Nice to be able to get into something just for you again though. I'm a single mum to one and only just managing to find time for my hobby which i hope may lead to a potential career change. I work full time at the moment, still from home which makes a massive difference. My son's dad isn't on the scene at all so free time is limited but no complaints at the moment, we're making it work.

Its looking like an overnight stay is happening this weekend with MrElf i'm very nervous because last time i slept with anyone was months ago actually (april ) with MrS where everything just worked like magic. He also doesn't drink which i know is a good thing but sometimes being just a little tipsy helps ease into things? Any advice?[/quote]
Am excited for you about your sleepover.

No tips really, just relax and be yourself. If you're not feeling it, you don't need to do anything that you don't want to

@BelladiMamma thanks! i'll just have to see how it goes and follow your advice from a previous post too Anything that gives you the ick or a funny feeling in your tummy - bin off wish i'd listened to this with the neighbour i tried to date would have saved a lot of awkwardness if i had.

Things have been going really well with mr coffee. Lots of dates, making time to see me, then last night told me I'm pretty but not that pretty. Really sad and hurt by it today.

The subject came up as he told me I'm his type of women, he likes my face then said the above...
"I'm pretty but not that pretty! Thoughts?

@FluffyFluffMonster could he have meant it as a badly delivered compliment? As in you're pretty but not overly made up or giggly girly or obsessive about your appearance? Not that there is anything wrong with any of those things but I know I've had exes who have said really stupid things and kicked themselves afterwards as what they actually said wasn't what they meant.

Alternatively he could just be a begging knob but if this was out of the blue and out of character, I'd ask him what he meant by his comment.

Negging not begging obvs

@FluffyFluffMonster I wondered the same re a badly delivered compliment, could it be like you're pretty but not loads of make up etc?! Clutching at straws possibly but you know him best!
Eeeek @Naimee87 good luck with Mr Elf! I too have my first overnight coming up with Mr Dimples and I'm swaying between insanely excited and panicking. The chemistry is there, he's lovely and I really want it to be 'good'..

@FluffyFluffMonster have you asked him what he meant by his comment? ❤️

@Naimee87 I too wish you good luck with Mr. Elf ❤️

I'm still on Hinge but I'm not feeling it at the moment, to be frank. I did have a chat going with somebody but it seems to have fizzled. It's strange, I can make the first move but then I have no idea how to talk to men after that. And then I just imagine dating them and being nervous and panicky, and shaking like a jelly.

@FluffyFluffMonster i think he may have meant what so many others have said in that you’re pretty without make-up? Not like caked in the stuff maybe. You could ask i suppose, did you just brush it off after he said it?
@Heartbeats0708 Ooooh! We’re in the same boat… i’m swaying as well! He is really nice and i’m soo looking forward to having him stay! Going to be exciting weekends for us! Finally!
@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards i tend to be really chatty perhaps too much and ask a lot of questions but sometimes it is just too much effort to drag out conversations, they should flow. I’m one of those people that just hates silences so i end up filling them. If you aren’t feeling the apps then best to take a brake. Any chance you may meet someone on the new course?

[quote Naimee87]@FluffyFluffMonster i think he may have meant what so many others have said in that you’re pretty without make-up? Not like caked in the stuff maybe. You could ask i suppose, did you just brush it off after he said it?
@Heartbeats0708 Ooooh! We’re in the same boat… i’m swaying as well! He is really nice and i’m soo looking forward to having him stay! Going to be exciting weekends for us! Finally!
@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards i tend to be really chatty perhaps too much and ask a lot of questions but sometimes it is just too much effort to drag out conversations, they should flow. I’m one of those people that just hates silences so i end up filling them. If you aren’t feeling the apps then best to take a brake. Any chance you may meet someone on the new course?[/quote]
@Naimee87 I might do that. I just can't think of anything to say at all at the moment.

Maybe. It's not that kind of course, though. It's going to just be a lot of looking at case studies and talking about hiring and firing. 😂😂😂

So I joined fab. Not sure what I think about it yet. Any tips?

I’ve blocked my 2 irons this week, then an old one reappeared, for some strange reason, maybe feeling fed up with it all, I did entertain it for a while. Which is not like me at all.

Fab first meet report!

Not good not bad really. The guy was good looking and polite good chat it just felt like a normal ok date tbh - no sexual pressure.

Bit red flaggy that he lied about where he actually lived (think thirty minutes train over walking distance to me)

and drove in...not sure whether this is a set up to get invited back (the first guy I chatted to on Fab was the same)

but I said goodbye after a few drinks anyway so his transport was his own concern?

We kind of proper kissed goodbye which was fine, a bit drunken studenty

and he did politely suggest I then came back to his but would be a massive trek for me to get home and wasn’t quite there physically!

so he’s sent a few messages but I will let this one fizzle out.

Oh the whole night ended up very random what with the big match and being tipsy!

Firstly, I may have permanently detached from MrPM as I sent him lots of union jacks and St. George’s flags after result 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

Second date was looking unlikely/ sparse anyway.

More dramatically, MrC sent me a message after we won, then a cab for me

and we kind of ended up drinking more and rowing a bit (lots of pent-up lockdown emotion and I sort of made him go on the sofa then got him back in with me) and then ended up...

It was pretty good tbh

But it seemed a bit dramatic (wouldn’t want to do that every week!)

so will see what happens there but also keep pushing through with other chats and meeting people and dates etc.

Part of me wants to suggest to MrC we just date properly this summer and close things when I move, but maybe more time needed at least till I’ve got through my current dates

@SpringlikeBunk

Oh the whole night ended up very random what with the big match and being tipsy!

Firstly, I may have permanently detached from MrPM as I sent him lots of union jacks and St. George’s flags after result 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

Second date was looking unlikely/ sparse anyway.

@SpringlikeBunk 🙂❤️❤️

@SpringlikeBunk

More dramatically, MrC sent me a message after we won, then a cab for me

and we kind of ended up drinking more and rowing a bit (lots of pent-up lockdown emotion and I sort of made him go on the sofa then got him back in with me) and then ended up...

It was pretty good tbh

But it seemed a bit dramatic (wouldn’t want to do that every week!)

so will see what happens there but also keep pushing through with other chats and meeting people and dates etc.

Part of me wants to suggest to MrC we just date properly this summer and close things when I move, but maybe more time needed at least till I’ve got through my current dates

Awww proper messy meet & update 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🙈🙈🙈

Could end up being a sausage fest summer for sexy spring once the sport is over .... ok have run out of alliterations now 😂

I am new. I have just had my FIRST DATE!

You MN are the first people I’ve told. I feel strangely proud of myself. Only just out there as only just double vaccinated, and also have DS age 9 that I have for most of the time… so not much time. I…

• lied about my age (massively, I am 49 but put myself as 41). I tried my real age and got absolutely nowhere. On bumble and tinder. Not sure about this but I just didn’t know how else to play it.
• genuine photo
• am only checking it once every weekend. Is that wise? Just find it too much in the weekdays.
• have a VERY low self esteem as am, well, 49, feel totally past it, Ex was very mean and cheated on me, feel like a broken mess.

Any help or advice appreciated. So good to see other lovey women out there on this thread. Read through a bit and it’s heartening.

[quote Naimee87]**@BelladiMamma* thanks! i'll just have to see how it goes and follow your advice from a previous post too Anything that gives you the ick or a funny feeling in your tummy - bin off* wish i'd listened to this with the neighbour i tried to date would have saved a lot of awkwardness if i had.[/quote]
Love sharing a bit of hard won advice ... trouble is it's taken me half a century to follow it myself 😀

I did ask him and He seemed angry at first. Said he meant it as in I'm not a women who's up my own arse and I'm approachable. He went out side for a smoke afterwards, came back in and said sorry he was angry with himself as he thought he fucked things up with me. When we first met he said he thought I would never give him the time of day.

@FluffyFluffMonster

I did ask him and He seemed angry at first. Said he meant it as in I'm not a women who's up my own arse and I'm approachable. He went out side for a smoke afterwards, came back in and said sorry he was angry with himself as he thought he fucked things up with me. When we first met he said he thought I would never give him the time of day.

Sorry. Red flag 🚩

@FluffyFluffMonster

I did ask him and He seemed angry at first. Said he meant it as in I'm not a women who's up my own arse and I'm approachable. He went out side for a smoke afterwards, came back in and said sorry he was angry with himself as he thought he fucked things up with me. When we first met he said he thought I would never give him the time of day.

I'm sorry, but that all sounds really strange. That would be a red flag for me too ❤️

3rd the red flag

@Rejoiningperson

I am new. I have just had my FIRST DATE!

You MN are the first people I’ve told. I feel strangely proud of myself. Only just out there as only just double vaccinated, and also have DS age 9 that I have for most of the time… so not much time. I…

• lied about my age (massively, I am 49 but put myself as 41). I tried my real age and got absolutely nowhere. On bumble and tinder. Not sure about this but I just didn’t know how else to play it.
• genuine photo
• am only checking it once every weekend. Is that wise? Just find it too much in the weekdays.
• have a VERY low self esteem as am, well, 49, feel totally past it, Ex was very mean and cheated on me, feel like a broken mess.

Any help or advice appreciated. So good to see other lovey women out there on this thread. Read through a bit and it’s heartening.

@Rejoining that's fantastic! I'm really pleased for you. Are you going to see each other again? ❤️

Put my big girl pants on and asked MrC his thoughts 🙈. I’m not averse to the idea of continuing

but I don’t want some weird set up where he’s trying to meet someone to have a family with and I’m sneaking in to see him like a Jezebel or it could be messy.

Welcome @Rejoiningperson