[quote SpringlikeBunk]@VanGoghsDog
Are you actually attracted to MrTall enough to spend a night with him or are you feeling it’s something you “ought” to do?
If you’re not physically comfortable enough and want an out date to get to know him next then that’s what you should have?
There’s no “third date sex” rule, do what you like when you like if you’re feeling pressurised don’t!
Can you have one of the irons over for date night (film? Dinner?) without feeling you need to commit to physical intimacy, just have a chat and a chill out evening! Maybe some cuddling etc if that’s the way things go.[/quote]
I am attracted enough to spend the night, but I don't want to lead him on when I'm really not sure he's longer term relationship material for me (he's quite dull and the DC puts me off, she's with him half the time, not a set routine, and sleeps in his bed!).
We've had three "out" dates - if that means going out?
I don't feel obliged at all. But he's asked me to find a way we can have a drink. It's a bit silly because it presumes I'm bothered about having a drink, which I'm not. He did mention him drinking beer (he had two both times, when he was driving) while I "sip water".
For both of us to drink we'd have to be at one of our houses and stay over. I can't go to his because it's literally a building site. He's a forty min drive away so no taxis and there's no public transport options.
I suppose I could go to his town and stay in a hotel.
I can't see the point of inviting him to my house for a film. I'm not going to cook for him (he's a chef! Plus I don't cook for dates) so if he came here he'd have to cook or get take away.
I doubt he just wants to do a wine tasting evening, I'm pretty sure the wine comment is about getting me into bed.
MrWG I've already taken to bed twice (and never dated, nor dtd), so I'm okay with intimacy with him, though his kinky side may be too much for me I think so I'll have to put a stop to it at some point.