Dating thread 204 - surfing the SeaofTwits

[Shayelle2009]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@Isitreallyme77

So date with Mr Cricket confirmed for tomorrow (eek) , we are messaging a little bit today just general chit chat which is nice and breaks the ice a little. But he is busy and I'm busy so it's quite nice to actually be able to concentrate on work.

Sending you lots of luck, @Isitreallyme77 ❤️

@SpringlikeBunk

Stressed out bloke has just messaged me

It’s tough as he looks handsome and seems nice but projecting a “potentially needy” vibe and I don’t want to meet someone, get on, and then have to play counsellor....

You're better off out of things like that, @Spring. I hate people like that.

There's not much to report from me on the date front. Mr. Bookworm had his first COVID jab yesterday, and I haven't spoken to him today. I think he's still probably feeling a bit tired.

We normally have a video call during the weekend, (usually on a Sunday) so I shall see what happens then ❤️

[quote PyjamasOClock]@SpringlikeBunk sticking it on your profile would definitely set the boundary. I'm less resentful of 45 minutes from the comfort of my living room than I would be of the time it would take to go out and meet someone who's just not for me.

But I'm really with those of you who feel that seeing friends again is just such a joy and seeing someone I don't know doesn't quite compare, given my free time is precious and I don't know how much longer we'll be able to meet up with people. So am prioritising - am off until Tuesday now. Like @Onwards I have a chronic health condition- for me that means I have to pace myself anyway.[/quote]
@PyjamasOClock

Can I ask how often do people delete their profile and create a new one? On tinder I regularly open a profile, delete it after a couple of days, then a couple/few weeks later open one again... rinse/repeat. Never stay on there long.. just pop on, have a look and swipe, then delete.

Is this weird behaviour of me??!?

@Shayelle2009

Can I ask how often do people delete their profile and create a new one? On tinder I regularly open a profile, delete it after a couple of days, then a couple/few weeks later open one again... rinse/repeat. Never stay on there long.. just pop on, have a look and swipe, then delete.

Is this weird behaviour of me??!?

@Shayelle2009 no, I don't think it's weird of you at all. I've registered on the same website three times in the past.

I would say I probably delete my profiles every couple of months or so ❤️

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards thank you 😘

@Shayelle2009 I don't delete it but I do hide it, I hid it for two months after Computer Geek.

[quote Isitreallyme77]@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards thank you 😘[/quote]
@Isitreallyme77 😘

@Shayelle2009 I tend to do this too, once I establish a couple of chats. This time I think I'm going to just hide it though.

When you unmatch someone on Tinder do they come back in the stack does anyone know? Probably will if they delete and open a new profile but if not?

My only concern with that approach @Shayelle2009 would be that I'd swiped on someone but deleted my profile before they had seen me to swipe back. No idea how the algorithms work though.
@SpringlikeBunk do you have plans to meet Mr C?
Sitting on my hands not to message Mr O, to make his mind up whether or not to try, or Mr Polo just because apparently I'm a glutton for punishment.
Matched with a surprisingly nice potential, I darent name him yet but it's light, easy and reminding me that there's decent people out there for friends at the least.

Thanks @OnwardsEverStridingOnwards, @Isitreallyme77, @frankiefirstyear and @Heartbeats0708.... thinking maybe I need to stop deleting so fast and just let it sit.
Frankie when you unmatch someone one of you would need to delete and create a new profile to see them again.

Thank you. That's why I'm not deleting, hopefully can leave the twats in the sea for a bit longer!!

@Shayelle2009

Thanks *@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards, @Isitreallyme77, @frankiefirstyear and @Heartbeats0708*.... thinking maybe I need to stop deleting so fast and just let it sit. Frankie when you unmatch someone one of you would need to delete and create a new profile to see them again.

@Shayelle2009 👍🏻

I get you Frankie, you’ve flushed them down the loo... don’t ever want to see them again!!
One of the benefits of swiping quickly through is that I see and bin off any twats I’d previously deleted before they see me, but sometimes going too quickly I accidentally left swipe nice looking guys and think damn.. could have missed a good one there, and now it’s too late!

@Shayelle2009

Can I ask how often do people delete their profile and create a new one? On tinder I regularly open a profile, delete it after a couple of days, then a couple/few weeks later open one again... rinse/repeat. Never stay on there long.. just pop on, have a look and swipe, then delete.

Is this weird behaviour of me??!?

Never?

I suppose when I start a relationship I delete profiles.

Currently I have paused both Tinder and Bumble as I'm busy and I feel like I am juggling men in a number of different situations. I'd like a pause to sort my head out so no swiping, no new chats etc.

[quote frankiefirstyear]@Shayelle2009 I tend to do this too, once I establish a couple of chats. This time I think I'm going to just hide it though.

When you unmatch someone on Tinder do they come back in the stack does anyone know? Probably will if they delete and open a new profile but if not?

[/quote]
I think they do, I've certainly matched people again after they have unmatched me. I suppose it could be a new profile.

I'm really forgetful, so if they come back into the pile I recognise them, but don't know if they were a nice or a nasty 🤦‍♀️ will start a 'tinder screenshot army of twats album' for future reference, reckon I'm in this for the long haul with MrM flakey complications sitch atm 😫 haven't seen him in over a month, he hasn't phoned me for about 3 weeks and texts are few too, though he says we're ok but he's struggling with his MH atm (and the pub is open again - he hasn't admitted this is a reason but I know it is!)

@SpringlikeBunk I would say avoid Stressed out bloke, I've been there. I was Computer Geek's agony aunt in the end, not what I actually wanted. Now I look back it's apparent he just wanted someone to listen to him as he had no one as he hadn't told anyone what was going on. It messed with my head so much in the end.

@VanGoghsDog I don’t blame you, I find it gets time consuming and stressful when you have more than a few chats on the go

So I’ve gone back on tinder and I’m trying the algorithm crazy swipe right method. And it’s informed me I’ve run out of right swipes!! Hastily unmatching the freaks that are messaging!!

Poor you @frankiefirstyear 😞 are you going to get back out there, or hang on for him? 😕

Does anyone know when you get more right swipes to dish out on tinder? Is it once every 24 hours or something?

@Isitreallyme77 is it your date later with Mr Cricket? You’ve got a lovely sunny day for it 😊

I've never run out of right swipes, I didn't know that was possible. I ran out of super likes but that was because I kept forgetting not to swipe up for the profile like you do on Bumble. I never actually meant to super like anyone so running out didn't matter.

Haha @Shayelle2009 I'm still doing that after Saturday's swipe right frenzy. Although in fairness Mr Cricket was my one and only success of that session. I think I'm being extremely picky but then my justification is that if I saw them in a pub would I think wow he's hot. If not I'm unmatching them.

@Shayelle2009 yes date is this afternoon. Weather has improved today too.