Dating thread 204 - surfing the SeaofTwits

[Shayelle2009]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

I dunno, I think men tend to be more visual so respond to the photos more quickly and don't read the profile.

Someone shoot me.... I'm back to talking to mr HT

Right - I’m heading out the door - nice dress on, mascara done with no smears, contact lenses in - no lipstick as I don’t want it all smeared round my chops as I’m shovelling poppadums and dips in - I’ll let you know how it goes when back ………

Ooh good luck @GaraMedouar first dates are sooo exciting!!!

@cravingthelook crikey, what's happening?

Interesting re the algorithm, I get so many bad ones but I never swipe on many. I'm going to look away from the screen and just swipe right on all the potatoes to see if this hack works.

God no! Don’t do it unless you find them attractive. You’re adding to the sum total of time wasted online dating otherwise.

Full geek out explanation to follow later...

That's true HAM!

I just can't swipe yes on photos I don't find attractive. I can't. How do you all let them down gently when you've initiated a conversation?! Also, if I've got to the end of the stack, surely I've seen them all anyway...?

www.vox.com/2019/2/7/18210998/tinder-algorithm-swiping-tips-dating-app-science

If you get more matches it is simply because you have swiped right more frequently or lowered your standards. Tinder/Bumble promote profiles that like you towards the front of your queue. On average men swipe right much more than women, so the women's queues are full of matches, while men's are less full - and hence less chance of matching. This skews the blokes towards swiping right more and enhances an already imbalanced situation (see link above: more men than women using online dating)

@Misty9

I just can't swipe yes on photos I don't find attractive. I can't. How do you all let them down gently when you've initiated a conversation?! Also, if I've got to the end of the stack, surely I've seen them all anyway...?

Just unmatch straight away, no conversation.

It still feels disingenuous...
I'm getting more enjoyment from TOTP 1991 this evening than OLD anyway

@GaraMedouar have fun tonight!

I'm currently talking to a guy with really lovely eyes, Mr Green Eyes, he is exactly my type too. He seems really nice, we swapped numbers earlier and he wants to meet me for a drink. We have the same interests although the rival football teams might be a problem🤣.

@VanGoghsDog

Five chats. One to dump for being four thousand miles away. And another for a pic with his tongue out and a gold chain. Then one with long hair to go too.

Two live ones look OK. Four not replied.

Which site do you get all the long distance ones?? So frustrating!!

@HairyArsedMan

God no! Don’t do it unless you find them attractive. You’re adding to the sum total of time wasted online dating otherwise.

Full geek out explanation to follow later...

Sorry I literally tried this for 2 weeks and I matched v quickly if it wasn't a good one, whittled it down to 5 within 2 weeks, met 3, dating 1

I'm no expert. Just what I did to feel like I was driving it myself a bit more. Could be totally self delusional 😅

It's Tinder - I get loads from the US.

@VanGoghsDog

It's Tinder - I get loads from the US.

I've never used Tinder. Why is it so crap with distances? Is there a glitch?

Oh my god, so Mr Green Eyes has literally asked me to go on a date on Sunday. He has also just sent me a photo and my god the last time I saw a six pack like that was on my gym instructor 😳😲 even Computer Geek didn't have a six pack like that and he had a very nice one. I think I might need to sit down ( well if I wasn't in bed I would 🤣).

@Isitreallyme77

Oh my god, so Mr Green Eyes has literally asked me to go on a date on Sunday. He has also just sent me a photo and my god the last time I saw a six pack like that was on my gym instructor 😳😲 even Computer Geek didn't have a six pack like that and he had a very nice one. I think I might need to sit down ( well if I wasn't in bed I would 🤣).

Woohoo!! Enjoy 😊

I've never used Tinder. Why is it so crap with distances? Is there a glitch?

No idea. Some don't put their location on and turn off location searching I think. They seem to think they can reel you in. We've seen enough women on MN who think they are in long distance virtual relationships to know it sometimes works!

@VanGoghsDog

I've never used Tinder. Why is it so crap with distances? Is there a glitch?

No idea. Some don't put their location on and turn off location searching I think. They seem to think they can reel you in. We've seen enough women on MN who think they are in long distance virtual relationships to know it sometimes works!

Yes. They need to come talk about the tsunami of twats with us

I think maybe if some guys pay they can access “global” searching - I met someone American in my first round on Tinder who was travelling lots and looking for people to go for drinks with in each country he visited?( looking back he was a bore so waste of a night out!)

Not sure if changing your own settings might help? I often don’t get round to doing this

I’ve found I tend to get global ones all bunched up with a streak of really bad inappropriate ones. Not sure if this is the algorithm working again

Ok so I should know better but beware of men living in Sheffield from Reading old

Evening all. Back from the curry night. Well my most successful date yet. Had a nice evening chatting over the meal. He insisted on paying - I did offer to go Dutch, but he refused.,
He’s said he’d like another date, quick peck goodbye. I just feel slightly, not sure, so out of practise - so probably go on second date to see- no thunderbolts, but I suppose there don’t need to be maybe? I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel (god I’m crap at this)

I never fancy anyone on online dating. Been dating a chap for 18 months as far as covid allowed since long distance.

Went for a drink with friend tonight znx chatted and realise that I want more than a weekend meet up with current chap. It suits him fine, but I want more from someone. So do I dump and chance old...j hated it last time but realised part time as in once a week is not me at all.