Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Original poster

Bf does not like giving oral

162 replies

thedukeofed · 12/05/2021 14:15

We're a few months in and all is wonderful. He told me from the first intimate occasion that he didn't Like giving oral but he felt that he had too.
He said that it's so warm , clammy down there and in the past didn't like the smell.
I'm not pushed on oral sex. It's never given me any pleasurable moments so I'm not upset that Im missing out. I could take or leave it .
He is a generous lover,always and we enjoy a spicy and varied sex life .
Is my Bar too low or would you be offended?
I explained that I would never want any intimate partner to feel that they' had' to do something that clearly disliked .

OP posts:

Sakurami · 13/05/2021 12:18

But willies can be smelly and have precum on them - does that mean that you refuse to give him a bj? Giving a man oral swx can lead to jaw ache and gagging but it is worth it because it is so pleasurable to them. However much easier to just use your hand. The more I read the more annoyed I get at your bf op.

A clean vulva isn't smelly just like a clean willy isn't smelly. Both can get a bit musky after a night of passion in the morning.

PurpleDaisies · 13/05/2021 12:20

But willies can be smelly and have precum on them - does that mean that you refuse to give him a bj?

Of course it does. You can refuse to give a BJ for any reason. It isn’t compulsory.

Original poster

thedukeofed · 13/05/2021 12:22

I asked of people would be offended and if they felt my bar too low .
I have my answers but I think it's been a really interesting debate . Thanks to everyone who replied

OP posts:

rumred · 13/05/2021 12:24

Just to clarify @thedukeofed I would be offended

Sakurami · 13/05/2021 12:25

@PurpleDaisies

But willies can be smelly and have precum on them - does that mean that you refuse to give him a bj?

Of course it does. You can refuse to give a BJ for any reason. It isn’t compulsory.

I meant generally. If he uses the excuse that vulvas can be smelly and clammy then op should could by that reasoning also dislike giving bjs because Willies can be smelly and have precum.

Original poster

thedukeofed · 13/05/2021 12:38

@Sakurami But why should/ could I when I enjoy it so much ?
I like giving oral sex . To me it would be depriving me of something I enjoy as much as punishing him for not having the exact same likes as me regarding oral sex
.
For example , I really enjoy anal play / sex also. He had never tried it before us.He has given from the get go and does so regularly .
He loves it now but had pleasuredme that way from the beginning despite him not wanting it initially and then through curiosity , he decided he wanted to try it himself . Now we both enjoy it .

OP posts:

osbertthesyrianhamster · 13/05/2021 12:55

Sakurami · 13/05/2021 12:55

Ok op. It is your life, you're the one that has to be happy and if you're happy then what I think shouldn't matter and I'm not sure why you asked. I've never felt the need to ask a question if I've been happy about a situation.

(Not criticising you for posting, but just want to make sure that you really are happy about it :) )

BlueVelvetStars · 13/05/2021 13:19

@Sakurami

(Not criticising you for posting, but just want to make sure that you really are happy about it :) )

I agree...

your very happy OP so why post ?

BlueVelvetStars · 13/05/2021 13:20

You're

midnightstar66 · 13/05/2021 13:33

I meant generally. If he uses the excuse that vulvas can be smelly and clammy then op should could by that reasoning also dislike giving bjs because Willies can be smelly and have precum.

And if OP minded that then I'm sure she wouldn't do it - but she doesn't mind at all so the reasoning wouldn't make sense.

gamerchick · 13/05/2021 13:46

wouldn't make sense

Neither does posting on the internet about it if you're perfectly happy with your set up.

category12 · 13/05/2021 13:58

So he's happy with ramming it up the shitter, but oral sex is clammy and smelly. No accounting for some folks.

Sakurami · 13/05/2021 14:34

@midnightstar66

I meant generally. If he uses the excuse that vulvas can be smelly and clammy then op should could by that reasoning also dislike giving bjs because Willies can be smelly and have precum.

And if OP minded that then I'm sure she wouldn't do it - but she doesn't mind at all so the reasoning wouldn't make sense.

But I'm guessing she isn't smelly so his excuse isn't relevant.

I wouldn't like to give a bj to a smelly willy. I'm sure there are Willies that smell. But my bf isn't smelly (a bit musky the next morning yes). I didn't take oral off the table because some willies are smelly.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 13/05/2021 14:35

@category12

So he's happy with ramming it up the shitter, but oral sex is clammy and smelly. No accounting for some folks.

And she loves it and giving him oral, too, sounds like a porn addict's dream, eh?

Original poster

thedukeofed · 13/05/2021 14:46

@osbertthesyrianhamster... A porn addict's dream ?? Because we both enjoy certain sex acts

OP posts:

BumCat · 13/05/2021 15:22

Well if you’re not fussed about it either and enjoy a satisfying sex life together, it sounds like you’re a good match.

Gymsmile21 · 13/05/2021 15:26

Your programmed to enjoy giving blowjobs.

No one finds jaw ache fun.

PurpleDaisies · 13/05/2021 15:27

@Gymsmile21

Your programmed to enjoy giving blowjobs.

No one finds jaw ache fun.

It’s not possible for a woman to enjoy giving a blow job? Every single woman who says they enjoy it is lying?

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 13/05/2021 15:35

Hmm this thread is odd. Someone posts about oral sex, is quite explicit in their description of sexual acts, and wants to hear what other people think and everyone joins in.
You seem to be very invested in "debating" this topic OP.

Original poster

thedukeofed · 13/05/2021 15:55

As I said ypthread I have my answers . There has been a huge variety of thoughts and I've said thanks . Happy to leave things here.

OP posts:

Branleuse · 13/05/2021 17:35

well its up to you isnt it. not sure of the point of the thread, as you seem to be pretty happy with your sexlife. Noone actually cares that much what you do. You dont like receiving oral, but you love giving BJs and taking it up the arse. Im sure your partner is delighted, and if youre happy thats cool

BlueVelvetStars · 13/05/2021 17:36

Baffling thread.. what was the purpose 😂🤣

Miasicarisatia · 13/05/2021 17:54

Sadly I know plenty of women who loathe giving oral sex but do it to keep their partners happy and not grumpy .They usually give it reluctantly for Christmas or their birthdays as a special request
surely in these scenarios the man knows she doesnt like doing it and is getting off on making her pleasure him even though it repulses her, he is enjoying the power imbalance and treating her like an object who's feeling dont matter?

Hont1986 · 13/05/2021 19:05

I think some posters on MN have some very regressive ideas about sex and sexuality, like sex is something that women reluctantly 'give up' to their beastly husbands. If a woman enjoys anything other than fortnightly missionary PIV then she's obviously only doing that because she's been brainwashed by her partner/she's been brainwashed by porn/she's actually a hairy-handed bloke wanking to the responses.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.

Swipe left for the next trending thread