Dating Thread 203- Love is in the air!

[Heartbeats0708]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@Shayelle2009 we all hear you. I too have terribly fed up times.

Mr Roads is still smitten but Sod's law is that he's got company issues thus is in now the north west for the next two weeks.

There's plenty other chats on the go.

I just want it to be easy.

On a positive note, I know some of you know of Miss Jam, an ex iron turned into an amazing best friend. We've booked a wee trip to the inner Hebrides in June. Will be good to have some time out.

@Eesha that's shite about the job.

@Shayelle2009 thats exactly what my agency said, not progressive at all but its ok, just a waste of my time. Apparently there are loads of senior women in the city who do 9 to 4, then 6 to 8 in the evening after the kids are down. However these are bigger companies. I think i need to aim there.

I think if MrPM doesn’t come through I’ll just enjoy shopping and lockdown ending stuff

then make like @cravingthelook and go away again somewhere countryside rather than city? See a loch.

I’ll give him a week then review 🤔

So pleased for you, @Belladi ❤️

@cravingthelook it’s hard isn’t it - you just want that lovely connection with someone, something consistent.. I keep thinking maybe it just doesn’t exist for me but I know thats just downheartedness speaking. It will be so fun having a little trip with your friend. I’ve booked flights to see my dad who lives abroad in August, so hope i’ll be able to go!!

@Eesha I reckon a bigger company is the way, my place has gone into the Times top 50 employers for women I think bigger companies aim to attract quality employees by promoting the flexible working, maybe much more WFH to come too now by most?

@SpringlikeBunk hope your Mr PM turns out to be better than my flop!!

I think it's fair to assume men suffer as much fear of rejection as women. Maybe more at times due to societal pressure to take the lead and not be anxious.

However, it is still the instinct to let the man lead!
I try to let them mainly lead but make sure I'm very on it when they take the initiative, assuming I am interested.

The apps just make all this posturing more visible I think.

@Shayelle2009 I think you did the right thing, if someone starts low effort then I can't see it getting much better.

I still think everyone looking for dates is jaded from lockdown, if there not chatty people, it's hard to talk about things as nothings been happening.

I had 5 chats during the week and they were very dry, but then I found myself being very dry as well.

I'm looking forward to the dating, but not the process of finding people, chatting and arranging dates

I do believe when you meet the right person and hit it off, that natural spark and chemistry would just pick you up and lift the lockdown dullness... like most things in life though I think it’s just right place, right time!

@BelladiMamma Tolerant is one way of describing it. To be fair I have matched and arranged to meet her at her oldest, so I don’t feel a deception has been made against me. It makes me wonder if she wants to attract someone younger though.

It’s made me wonder why people lower their age. If you are looking relatively good for your age at 50+x, then lowering your age to 50-x, diminishes the power of that ‘looking relatively good for your age’ doesn’t it ?

Or do I have it the wrong way round ? People that look impossibly good at 50+x are seen as catfish and have to change their age to something that more reflects their youthfulness so their profile comes across as more credible.

Yeah, that’ll be it.

It’s made me wonder why people lower their age. If you are looking relatively good for your age at 50+x, then lowering your age to 50-x, diminishes the power of that ‘looking relatively good for your age’ doesn’t it ?

I put my age higher so men have to say "wow, you don't look sixty!"

(I don't really).

[quote HairyArsedMan]@BelladiMamma Tolerant is one way of describing it. To be fair I have matched and arranged to meet her at her oldest, so I don’t feel a deception has been made against me. It makes me wonder if she wants to attract someone younger though.

It’s made me wonder why people lower their age. If you are looking relatively good for your age at 50+x, then lowering your age to 50-x, diminishes the power of that ‘looking relatively good for your age’ doesn’t it ?

Or do I have it the wrong way round ? People that look impossibly good at 50+x are seen as catfish and have to change their age to something that more reflects their youthfulness so their profile comes across as more credible.

Yeah, that’ll be it.[/quote]
Ha ha I quite like that explanation 50+ and looking good .... catfish 🤣

That's why I deliberately went for some 'here's my grey hair' selfies with my profile pics. I thought - yeah you can't say I didn't tell you that I was showing my age 🤣

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards

So pleased for you, *@Belladi* ❤️

❤️❤️❤️🐻🐻🐻

@Shayelle2009

Thanks *@BelladiMamma*... honestly I think I’m so used to just being on my own now I’d be very surprised if anyone came into my life. He replied saying ‘I sure am how r u’ so I unmatched, clearly not interested at all. *@TheCatWithTheHat* I rarely bother with the apps just every now then I think.. have a little look .. maybe they just work better for others!!

Yes that's a bit of a 'meh' message. Sad to say back in the day it would have been enough to keep me in the game

Not any more though!

Hope your date goes well @HairyArsedMan I think its crazy lying about age and how completely random she’s put all different ages on different sites? Good luck with it though when are you meeting?

Thanks @BelladiMamma I mean i don't expect raptures just because I messaged but it just felt disinterested and careless and that’s not how I want to be treated.

Another one chucked back into Sea of Twats..

Hi. I've been on and off this thread for 4 yrs, under various names!
Please keep me grounded.
Something in me has gone a bit haywire since lockdown is ending. Joined a really dire OLD site and got so despondent that I reached out to an ex.
Am supposed to be meeting him this morning in my local park. I feel rough as too much vino last night, on my own! Nerves?
So, MrSolid (as I used to call him) seems to have lost a lot of weight (we facetimed last night) and is really keen. He is a shift worker and that's part of the reason why it never worked out. Back in the day I was a bit flaky to be fair. He's often been my inbetween go to bloke.
I've calmed down a lot since my split with DH 4 yrs ago.
Not sure what I'm asking here but place marking so I can check in and keep my sanity. Will update after our date (walk).

@ItsNotLoveActually
I think most of us would be nervous seeing an extra again for a date, it's natural

It sounds like it's been a long time, maybe treat it as a fresh start/new person and go from there?
Remember there's no obligation for further dates if you don't feel a connection, so just breathe and try to have fun :)

Good luck on your date today, @HairyArsedMan ❤️

@countesskay - it is indeed a fresh start. Just got back from a long walk. Picked a great day for it.
He admitted he was a bit selfish before and I admitted I was a bit demanding. Both feel we have changed out outlook on life, partly due to Covid but mostly because we have dated others and are clearer about what we want/don't want etc.
But I will try and keep grounded, will keep posting here and see how it pans out!
Any one else out on a date today? How's is going @HairyArsedMan?

Just had another wonderful video date with Mr Bookworm. We both said that we fancied each other, so I think things are definitely moving forward 🤞🏻❤️

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards great news, he sounds lovely!

[quote Eesha]@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards great news, he sounds lovely![/quote]
@Eesha thank you. He is really lovely ❤️

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards - that’s lovely to hear - glad it’s going well 💐

@HairyArsedMan - hope your date went well today too

[quote GaraMedouar]@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards - that’s lovely to hear - glad it’s going well 💐

@HairyArsedMan - hope your date went well today too [/quote]
@GaraMedouar ❤️