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Original poster

Dating Thread 203- Love is in the air!

986 replies

Heartbeats0708 · 26/04/2021 06:40

The Rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. Know your worth.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

OP posts:
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12
countesskay · 07/05/2021 13:24

Can you book a date in now? Or suggest one and then Check in again in a few days?

I think the decline in text is always a difficult one, personally I think checking in every few days to say hi is fine

stealthninjamum · 07/05/2021 13:30

fireflygal if someone asked me to wait more than ten days after we’d had some outdoor dates (unless there was a good reason) I’d assume they weren’t interested and would perhaps withdraw. I would suggest some indoor places and leave the ball in his court.

SpringlikeBunk · 07/05/2021 14:32

@Fireflygal

I guess that’s often the nature of app dating - people sort of fading and drifting in and out and things being less formal?

I actually think if you haven’t had physical intimacy (just a few hours outdoors) it doesn’t really need “closure” - just continue meeting others or with your other dates?

Don’t message him if you’re not enjoying it.

If you do randomly fancy meeting after 17th May drop him a message? He might pick it up he might not.

If you were getting on and he’s an ok guy and hasn’t been leading you on there’s no point burning bridges before you have to? He might even just be a going out mate which could be nice.

Fireflygal · 07/05/2021 15:31

@stealthninjamum, we spoke about next time having a few drinks so would go to a City and not worry about driving and I just mentioned 17th would be easier...it was a throw away comment really but realise it might have been taken as a delay.

@SpringlikeBunk, good way of looking at it and yes it might be the nature of OLD. I guess we chatted quite a bit, were open about our lives so there was some connection but I hadn't felt the urge to jump him.. I would like him as a friend if that was possible.

However I'm at that stage in OLD (as a site newbie) were I almost have too many chats going and it all feels very optimistic BUT from past experience the ones that will ultimately result in a meet are quite low!

Misty9 · 07/05/2021 16:17

Too many chats... Not a problem I have! Grin

I've got Mr canoe chatting but not sure what to think as he won't send a different photo to his profile one. Gave a semi plausible reason but not sure... Enjoying the chat though and meeting has been mentioned. Keeping my spidey senses alert for now... Meanwhile Mr engineer seems to think that one or two messages a day, with no talk of a date, is enough to hold my interest Hmm
Still haven't braved tinder...

OnwardsEverStridingOnwards · 07/05/2021 16:25

Hi everyone,

Just want to say a big thank you to @countesskay for her post earlier. Was really great to hear some insight from Someone with the same condition as me 🙂

Also, I've decided to hide my Bumble profile for the time being. I don't really have the time or the energy for multiple irons at the moment, plus I want to see where things lead with Mr Bookworm. I'm not going to completely delete my profile yet just in case, but I think I owe it to myself to give it some time to see how things end up ❤️

SpringlikeBunk · 07/05/2021 16:36

Just a bit of a wildcard "new dating" option - I've signed up to Interpals language learning exchange site as I need a language buddy for exams this year?

There's LOTS of dating orientated people although I'm just after a chat partner. Big range of backgrounds and ages it's not all students.

(seem to be a few international wannabe scammers too so be wary of certain locations - you can restrict who contacts you?).

countesskay · 07/05/2021 17:02

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards
No worries 😊 its always nice to meet others with CP, I haven't met many as an adult

OnwardsEverStridingOnwards · 07/05/2021 17:04

[quote countesskay]@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards
No worries 😊 its always nice to meet others with CP, I haven't met many as an adult[/quote]
@countesskay I haven't met many others since I was at college Smile

OnwardsEverStridingOnwards · 07/05/2021 17:08

[quote namechanged9999]@countesskay - I was freaking out about nothing. After 3 hours he texted to say he's at drinks and will reply properly a bit later and sent me a kiss. Then he did reply and said sorry he has been so slow and wished we good night and sweet dreams, and good morning in the AM.

I'm glad I didn't do anything stupid lol.

My thing with the attachment issue is that I had a great attachment and still do to my parents , and my childhood was an amazing one. No mommy or daddy issues. However in high school I was nothing short of ugly, always rejected, my bf dumped me for my best friend and I was a total ugly duckling and no man ever liked me apart from a select few. However I really grew into myself and now I get loads of male attention (stopped on street, popular on dating websites, always being complimented), but I still have these rejection insecurities. Also my Bf cheated on me with a lesbian in uni lol.

Anyways, that's my trauma. [/quote]
I'm sorry @namechanged9999. That's horrible. I've got some anxiety issues due to previous relationships too. It's so horrible when people hurt you like that ❤️

Sending you ❤️ and ThanksThanksThanks

OnwardsEverStridingOnwards · 07/05/2021 17:29

@stealthninjamum

fireflygal if someone asked me to wait more than ten days after we’d had some outdoor dates (unless there was a good reason) I’d assume they weren’t interested and would perhaps withdraw. I would suggest some indoor places and leave the ball in his court.
I agree with this ❤️
Eesha · 07/05/2021 17:30

@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards I think youre doing the right thing, its worth giving it a real shot given you have such chemistry.

Unfortunately didn't get the job. They were asking me about childcare, which im not sure they should have. Anyway, didn't get it because they didn't think it could be done flexibly, ie me leaving at half 4 and then working later into the night. Otherwise they said they would have offered it to me.

BelladiMamma · 07/05/2021 17:34

[quote Eesha]@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards I think youre doing the right thing, its worth giving it a real shot given you have such chemistry.

Unfortunately didn't get the job. They were asking me about childcare, which im not sure they should have. Anyway, didn't get it because they didn't think it could be done flexibly, ie me leaving at half 4 and then working later into the night. Otherwise they said they would have offered it to me.[/quote]
Ok that's actually borderline illegal now. Look up the latest campaign by Pregnant then Screwed to see the legislation re flexible working.

OnwardsEverStridingOnwards · 07/05/2021 17:55

[quote Eesha]@OnwardsEverStridingOnwards I think youre doing the right thing, its worth giving it a real shot given you have such chemistry.

Unfortunately didn't get the job. They were asking me about childcare, which im not sure they should have. Anyway, didn't get it because they didn't think it could be done flexibly, ie me leaving at half 4 and then working later into the night. Otherwise they said they would have offered it to me.[/quote]
Thanks @Eesha! ❤️

OnwardsEverStridingOnwards · 07/05/2021 17:56

Sorry to hear about the job as well ThanksThanksThanksThanks

Eesha · 07/05/2021 18:34

@BelladiMamma yes you're right. Im on very good terms with my agency who told me exactly what went down. Its just something ive never come across before, discrimination.

Misty9 · 07/05/2021 18:48

Ha - Mr canoe has come clean and said he faked his profile to see if he'd get more interest 😂

SpringlikeBunk · 07/05/2021 19:48

Lol @Misty9

Tinder yourself up - there’ll be a lot more choice

so you’ll still get the freaks but hopefully some decent contacts thrown in there

10YellowTulips · 07/05/2021 19:54

@Misty9

Ha - Mr canoe has come clean and said he faked his profile to see if he'd get more interest 😂
Oh dear, at least he fessed up.

So have you asked for his real pic? Or will you drop him?

HairyArsedMan · 07/05/2021 19:55

Faking fake profiles!

Hmm so I have arranged a date with someone I’ve seen on three different sites now, and she has three different ages across the sites. I matched with her in her oldest version. Wonder if it’s a similar experiment to see who she catches ? I’m going to call her Miss CanISeeYourBirthCertificate.

HairyArsedMan · 07/05/2021 19:58

ps. no-one has ever suspected me of having a fake profile 😄

(@Misty9 Tinder and Bumble have verified profiles for this reason)

namechanged9999 · 07/05/2021 19:59

He's gone MIA again for 5 hours and hasn't replied on whatsapp. Is it crazy if tomorrow (we are meant to be meeting) I ask him how he thinks this is going, if everything is alright and if something is bothering him? I have a kid and don't have time to play games here.

Shayelle2009 · 07/05/2021 20:08

Ive not heard from Mr Mac since yday lunchtime. Is this a bad sign? Trying not to think the worst 😑

VanGoghsDog · 07/05/2021 20:09

Miss CanISeeYourBirthCertificate

Lol!

MrDecorator date was nice, we had two drinks in the cold at the pub, evesdropping the quiz night.
He came back for coffee but I did make it clear it was just coffee (not sure I'm quite 'there' yet). Two kisses on lips, not snogs though.
He's now gone a bit quiet on text, which I think often happens after they think they've 'got' you. Responsive when I text but the 'morning' text didn't come.

I've been out walking today and text chat with MrWG this evening (which went in a very odd direction, but I clawed it back!).

MrNeckKisser gave me the most hideous birthday gift, lord knows why he thinks he has to nor what he was thinking generally.
This: www.celebrategifts.co.uk/collections/all/products/the-yankee-candle-and-pink-rose-bouquet

It is literally the ugliest thing that has ever been in my house, I have no idea what to do with it. I mean, obviously I take it apart but - plastic roses??

Also, I had told him it was funny getting all the cheese because my mum had said she's had got me an afternoon tea in a box (I was just telling him because my mum is going a bit doolally), so MrNK texted to say he had "done his best at short notice given my disappointment" and on my doorstep, along with the ugly thing, was a bag with some weird squashed looking home made scones (two in cling film), a whole packet of Anchor butter (I have butter FFS!) and a £1 Happy Shopper jar of raspberry jam. I mean.....seriously?

I need to read him his horoscope pretty soon I think, stop this in its tracks. Any hints on how to do this are very welcome.

OnwardsEverStridingOnwards · 07/05/2021 20:12

@namechanged9999

He's gone MIA again for 5 hours and hasn't replied on whatsapp. Is it crazy if tomorrow (we are meant to be meeting) I ask him how he thinks this is going, if everything is alright and if something is bothering him? I have a kid and don't have time to play games here.
@namechanged9999 I'd forget about him, if I was you. He's messing you around. And that's not the way you deserve to be treated. ❤️