worst ways to find out your partner has cheated

[Tnytears]

So a bit of light hearted fun for a Friday. What was the worst way you found out a partner had cheated on you?
I always had a gut feeling my partner was cheating I left him when my daughter was 3 - he met someone else - they had a daughter and she also left him - I became friends with his ex and asked how when they met etc thinking she was post me - she said she meet him in 2005 - I was like "oh yes that was the year my daughter was born" -

I found a photo of them kissing on Facebook which OW had living signed 'my little cunt', I was pregnant with his son at the time. He later tried to force me to have an abortion to protect his relationship. 3 years
On and I'm
Still not over it.

We had the same email adress but different providers .Something like [email protected] for him and [email protected] for me .

After ghosting one (of his many) other women she tried the yahoo version of the email in case she had it wrong.

I got this lengthy ,sobbing "what we had was so wonderful " email.

Too young and dumb to dump there and then. Took me a while.

I'm sitting here reading these with my jaw on the floor.

Being told by Police on death of husband about OW
When Mum has passed from cancer
Betrayal of/with best friends
Partner and Daughter

Omg. All I can say is that I salute each and everyone who has survived and thrived after getting rid of these utterly heartless, selfish, devoid of morals or empathy, complete bastards. May they spend eternity trying to shit a giant hedgehog out of their lying arses.

@spicysechuan I’m afraid so. X

Ex had left the laptop open with his emails on full display, 7 year old son 'Mum, ewww what's that?'. Well it was multiple pictures of my ex with my underwear on with a butt plug in on email to his boyfriend. What's worse is I was heavily pregnant and living in a different country with him due to his job so I didn't leave. No, took me several years later and many dating profiles later to get rid. Where he's done it to 2 more women and rinsed our bank accounts

Oh goodness this brings me back. My ex dp was really poorly. I rang his friend for some help. We pretty much manhandled him into the car and into a&e. He was confused, drowsy and totally out of it. It was meningitis.

Blood tests, emergency brain scans...it was awful. The next morning after a night in a&e. I tried to contact his employer via his phone only to discover loads of messages.

I rang her and said he's obviously important to you so you are welcome to visit.

Nursed him to health over 3 weeks and then kicked him out as soon as he was well enough.

He had a new company car that had some sort of internal mobile phone which he'd been using to message her. I was in the car going through the car wash & to while away the time was playing with the screen. Up came a message telling him how good he was in bed. And then read it out to me in a disjointed computer-voice.
I'll never forget. Haunts me to this day. And that was 15 years ago.

Caught him using a second phone . Demanded he handed it over while I looked. He didnt want to , kept saying it would be embarrassing. I thought it would be porn as I hate it and he knows it.
Turns out he was texting a BLOKE he had met up with to see how his Xmas was. The same Xmas I got a shitty present for. But I did not realise that yet. Ran to our room, locked myself and read a load of messages to an OW who lived abroad. Devastating. He was all apologetic ,I thought it was an EA. I hid the phone and a week later , forced myself to look through it . Turns out that there was a Bumble account with a woman nearby - she sent him bathtub shots !- and then I discovered dick pics he had sent to the bloke. And he also had met up with EA woman in UK.

Married 30 years and he is nearly 60.
Readers , he is still in the house , although living seperately.
Young women , always be financially independent .

My ex was a psychologist. He said he had met up with two other people, a couple, in the same profession and they had recently acquired premises in London that they were doing up. He was helping them at weekends and he was learning useful skills like plaster-boarding, in exchange for renting a room off them occasionally. I made him lovely homemade soups to take with him for lunch and he arrived home freshly showered so as to get rid of the dust. This went on for weeks, until I found a petrol receipt for the very time he was supposed to be in London, but it was from Ramsgate! He had been totally convincing, telling me all about what work he had done each day. It was so detailed, but he was busy shagging OW all along. I chucked him out that day.

So, here we go. Me 23F, he 25M. 5 year boyfriend now fiancé (Yeah. tell me how dumb I am.) New Nissan Leaf from daddy for getting my masters. (love you daddy ❤) Six months before lockdown. His car tail ended, he 'suddenly' needed to be at a head office meeting in Birmingham. (red flag) 🤔 Mmmmh! Nicky Nissan (Every car needs a name right?) was brand new, only delivery plus two trips to Tesco. Off she goes on her first big adventure to Birmingham.
14 days later, traffic light camera fine arrives in the post, from Salisbury, (he was supposed to be in Birmingham) The car hadn't been used since his return, we flew to Greece on holiday. So, que detective mode, worked out the mileage and was confused. There was only one person I knew from Salisbury. My bestie from as young as 11, N. It's funny how our heads dismiss facts we don't like, because I tried hard to do that. I talk to a close friend Si who goes all Sherlock and tells me not to confront. We double check mileages, confront. The best of it was the Ex trying to show me on a piece of A4 how I'd worked it out wrong. (I'd just had my masters in math/economics) 86m Mcr- Birmingham, 200 Salisbury times 2. close right! (Clincher, he put her postcode in Salisbury in the satnav) 🤣 MI6 material right?
Sad thing is 5 out of the 8 in the friends group knew and no one let me know. It doesn't hit you at first, took a day or two. I wasn't even mad, just heartbroken over N. He's just a guy, guys can be replaced, lifelong friends with all the memories and moments, the little secrets you tell each other. Not so easy.

Best though was his next move. Apparently we were in an open relationship? 🙄 Wish someone had told me, I was missing out on so much fun. 🤣 Guy neurons are weird. He mentioned it a month before (red flag) I went crazy. Sad thing is they didn't want to be together. Could have understood if they were in love. She begged me not to tell here boyfriend. Yeah, right! So, that was that, two couples and a friend group destroyed. Only two friends left, Si and Alison, I moved down to London and I never went back.

You're right @Kyniska I think I would be far more upset over a best friend's betrayal than a boyfriends. It's just the lowest of the low.

My first fiance - the phone rang and I answered it. A girl I didn't know was on the other end asking for him, I said he was out and asked who she was so I could tell him to call her when he got back. She said she was his girlfriend and needed him because her horse was loose and her dad had suggested he could help her. I told her I was surprised she was his girlfriend because we were engaged, and she said that she felt really awkward, she knew I was unwell but I really needed to accept that it had been over for a long time. She genuinely seemed uncomfortable and I am still convinced she wasn't phoning to be malicious, she believed that we were only living together for convenience. I had believed the same when he was living with his wife (yes I know, but i was 17 and even his parents told me he was divorced).

When we eventually split up (not soon enough but I was way too easily fooled then) I found out horse girl had been riding him for months. They are still together now and married, more than 20 years on, so they were obviously meant to be together. I bear no grudges really because if it wasn't for her I wouldn't have met DH soon after ex left me.

Bless, can you believe how naïve we all were at 17. Must have been her rising trot that hooked him! 🤣