Hello
Please can I ask for some advice? I've been with my husband for 8 years and I don't know if things are okay between us. I was only 18 when we got together and I felt so grown up but looking back I was a bit immature. I was unhappy at my parents and just wanted to get out and we moved in together and got married very quickly. We've no kids yet.
Our life is lovely most of the time, but I had a conversation with my sister and she said some things don't seem right and she was worried about me? Sorry if one of these is TMI but this is what I told her:
- When we watched the Bake Off I said I might apply next time as I love to bake and like to think I'm good at it. He said "why do you want to do that, you wouldn't win?!" this is an example but he does say stuff like this to me fairly often
- We had a really strange start to our sex life. I'd had sex before and he said he had too, but it took us two years to sleep together. We did other stuff just not full sex, and the first few times we did he told me how shit I was at it. He wants it often now but I don't enjoy doing it that much and I always have these things in the back of my mind and I never have an orgasm because I'm so worried I'm being awful or embarassing
- He has quite a good job and earns a decent amount and doesn't like me working. I work as a nursery nurse and I love it so much so that I don't want to leave but I have gone part time but he does bug me often about when we have kids I'll have to give it up fully and he wishes I would give it up now, that he can take care of us financially and he would rather me be home. I feel guilty that I don't quit because he says other women would jump at the chance. I would like to get a degree in early childhood studies that I can do at college while I'm working but he says there's no point doing it and getting into debt when we'll have kids soon and I won't be working then
- He doesn't like drinking or going out, so we don't really. We don't have McDonalds or KFC as he doesn't like them. He looks down on people who do do those things. I do things without him sometimes but not very often as he can be a bit moody about it and for example if I go out on a Saturday things will be miserable on Sunday and he might give me silent treatment which I really hate or he'll just be grumpy about everything
My sister said he seems controlling but I think that these are just the low points and anyone else in a relationship would have similar things they could say but people just don't talk about the bad bits of their relationships in public. She said I should post on here to see what other people thought?
Sorry if this is too long or I'm just being silly x