Dating Thread 202: Here's hoping the lockdown loneliness and longing eases up soon...

[SpringlikeBunk]

Come ye all!

I should add I don’t have anything like a chip on my shoulder about height. People like what they like and there’s plenty of variety to go around. Most guys are taller than most women anyway, so profiles asking for height are wasting characters in my view.

(I don’t have any preference on height of women #ThumbelinaSwiper)

@HairyArsedMan

I should add I don’t have anything like a chip on my shoulder about height. People like what they like and there’s plenty of variety to go around. Most guys are taller than most women anyway, so profiles asking for height are wasting characters in my view.

(I don’t have any preference on height of women #ThumbelinaSwiper)

Thumbelina 🧚‍♀️ here isn't remotely offended ☺️

My main issue is my curves - I definitely don't like to sit next to a man whose thighs are skinnier than mine it makes me feel vvv unsexy 🤷🏻‍♀️

I recognised someone on bumble tonight who I spoke to last year, I remember him being nice to chat to do I matched him and first messsge he sends is “we spoke last year and I just matched to say I was a total dick to you and I want to apologise”

Doesn’t it say a lot that I don’t even remember him being a dick because so many of them are

I don't consider myself to be particularly tall at 5'7 but I'm finding most men seem to be my height and I do have to say my preference is a taller man. Of course if the chemistry is good the height doesn't matter; it's just annoying when a potential iron says he is 5'10 for example but is 5'7. If they have bent the truth on that then I always wonder if there is anything else they have bent the truth on

@Disposableplates it's totally fine to have a break from it all, that's what I'm doing after ending a 10 month relationship. Come over to the 'unexpected joys of being single' thread, it will cheer you up :)

My date with Mr Nuclear was a disappointment for many reasons, one of them being the fact that he'd clearly added a couple of inches to his profile height. So pointless to lie about height as it will be exposed immediately on meeting. I'm 5'6 or 5'7 (think I might have shrunk) and not bothered about heels but really want someone taller than me. Mr Music preferred short women, so it works both ways.

@WeWantTheFinestWines

My date with Mr Nuclear was a disappointment for many reasons, one of them being the fact that he'd clearly added a couple of inches to his profile height. So pointless to lie about height as it will be exposed immediately on meeting. I'm 5'6 or 5'7 (think I might have shrunk) and not bothered about heels but really want someone taller than me. Mr Music preferred short women, so it works both ways.

Lies are just lies. Height or anything else. Just plain wrong

@SpringlikeBunk

Just off the phone with lovely surgeon bloke really chatty and he’s going to try to come to my city earlier to meet

Not going to hold my hopes out as the NHS is going to be his first wife right now

but just “one nice meet” to dress up and go out is fine with me

Sounds great @Spring 👍🏻

@BelladiMamma

So the walking date with Mr Italian went well. He's a really nice guy, definitely not a sex pest but ... owns a property here which is let out ... no fixed abode here. No signs of being a cocklodger but equally no way of progressing the relationship unless he's prepared to shell out for hotels as I'm not going to be hosting.

In Italy he still shares a house with his ex and their child but they try not to be there at the same time and she goes to see her parents etc when he's back.

It's not an obvious situation for me really and I get the impression he's testing the water to see who's out there dating wise. My part of the world is on his list of places he'd like to buy once his financial settlement is sorted but they're nowhere near that.

Hmmm. Back burner methinks.

That sounds a bit awkward, @Belladi. At least you've given him a chance and I'm glad you had a good time. ❤️

@Invisiblewoman1

I have a question - semi serious... Why does every other bumble profile say “oh and I am x foot, as that seems important on here”

The heights are in the basic info already?!

Passive aggressive shit - red flag for me!

I have four, yes FOUR, chats going on. It's hectic, I can't keep up!

I think people are right that the lockdown easing has brought them out.

One has a few amber flags (jokily tried to get me to invite him round for coffee, initially didn't take no for an answer, so I ignored him for a while and he came back suggesting a walk, but also has got a bit humpy that I won't tell him how many relationships I've had and has asked for a full length pic).

One was sending cute voice messages last night and we had a good exchange but has gone quiet today.

A new one tonight talks in tedious cliches and ends every one with a tongue out emoji, he can quietly fade away. Shame, he has a cute dog.

Last one more promising, sounds unbelievably normal. Just chatting, about normal stuff. No silly requests, no dissing, no disappearing, just normal!

I've ordered a new jacket from Fat Face so I'm not always just 'middle aged lady in rain coat channelling Vera'.....

Nah, it’s part of the online dating evolutionary pressures @VanGoghsDog. Who knows where it started but at some point someone thought it was a good idea to declare how proud they were of their accomplishment in growth, and others found admiration in such an accomplishment. Voila, symbiosis; it became a thing.

Anyway my sister told me to put my height on mine 😆

@VanGoghsDog

I have four, yes FOUR, chats going on. It's hectic, I can't keep up!

I think people are right that the lockdown easing has brought them out.

One has a few amber flags (jokily tried to get me to invite him round for coffee, initially didn't take no for an answer, so I ignored him for a while and he came back suggesting a walk, but also has got a bit humpy that I won't tell him how many relationships I've had and has asked for a full length pic).

One was sending cute voice messages last night and we had a good exchange but has gone quiet today.

A new one tonight talks in tedious cliches and ends every one with a tongue out emoji, he can quietly fade away. Shame, he has a cute dog.

Last one more promising, sounds unbelievably normal. Just chatting, about normal stuff. No silly requests, no dissing, no disappearing, just normal!

I've ordered a new jacket from Fat Face so I'm not always just 'middle aged lady in rain coat channelling Vera'.....

@VanGogh I've got my 🤞🏻 for you and Mr. Normal 🙂

@VanGoghsDog also fingers crossed for mr normal!

@HairyArsedMan

Nah, it’s part of the online dating evolutionary pressures *@VanGoghsDog*. Who knows where it started but at some point someone thought it was a good idea to declare how proud they were of their accomplishment in growth, and others found admiration in such an accomplishment. Voila, symbiosis; it became a thing.

Anyway my sister told me to put my height on mine 😆

It's not the putting the height in that is passive aggressive, it's the "as that seems to matter round here", like they are pretending they don't get why people do find height an important factor, when they probably do too.

I counselled a friend to take out "that's not too much to ask is it?" from the end of his profile for the same reason.

Sloth , invisible and Vangogh , good luck on your potential irons.

Belladi - I’m the same as you - I’m short 5’1- but not slim. My rule of thumb is my date must weigh more than me ! I don’t take a pair of scales but feel chunky with anyone super slim and fit.

So - I’ve just matched on Bumble with someone last night. I just sent a hello gif and he’s sent a reply saying ‘hi - hope you are well - do you fancy meeting up for a drink or a walk?’
I’ve always had mini chats with guys. That seems really quick before even a couple of messages. Is that normal for some to just suggest to meet instantly? My immediate reaction to that is to swipe ‘no’ and run away.

@GaraMedouar

I wouldn’t say immediate red flag though it’s unusual I agree. I’ve met some guys sooner who are fine.

Can you say yes/agree provisionally then chat whilst you’re arranging the walk? Then don’t go through with it if you don’t want to/any red flags -

Maybe he just doesn’t like chatting for ages so wants confirmation you’re game to meet before investing more time

Yes SpringlikeBunk - that’s probably it. Just caught me unawares. I’ve only ever met one iron so far for a walk so I’m relatively new to all this. (Mid fifties and hopeless at this!)

Yeh you could just say “that sounds great” and keep on communicating/chatting as it would take time to organise or get to a meet anyway - you can always block him or stop chatting if you don’t like the sound of it.

Agree with u it is a bit unusual straight off but then I guess it’s better than months of how’s your day messages

@HairyArsedMan

Nah, it’s part of the online dating evolutionary pressures *@VanGoghsDog*. Who knows where it started but at some point someone thought it was a good idea to declare how proud they were of their accomplishment in growth, and others found admiration in such an accomplishment. Voila, symbiosis; it became a thing.

Anyway my sister told me to put my height on mine 😆

🤣

@GaraMedouar

Sloth , invisible and Vangogh , good luck on your potential irons.

Belladi - I’m the same as you - I’m short 5’1- but not slim. My rule of thumb is my date must weigh more than me ! I don’t take a pair of scales but feel chunky with anyone super slim and fit.

Yes I think if wE are curvy there's definitely an interest in having someone chunkier my thick skin doesn't extend to being with someone slimmer than me - sad but true

I'm in. Newly divorced got all the apps to see what it was all about. Blimey.

I'm not really looking for something serious, just cos I've only just left a marriage. But I like the idea of dating, flirting, finding out what I want or don't want.

It feels like a full time job sometimes though! I've got a few chats going, some on Tinder and some on WhatsApp. I'm hopefully meeting one guy this week, although we realised we live quite far away, but get one sooo we'll over chat.

What does iron mean?

@GaraMedouar

So - I’ve just matched on Bumble with someone last night. I just sent a hello gif and he’s sent a reply saying ‘hi - hope you are well - do you fancy meeting up for a drink or a walk?’ I’ve always had mini chats with guys. That seems really quick before even a couple of messages. Is that normal for some to just suggest to meet instantly? My immediate reaction to that is to swipe ‘no’ and run away.

I understand why you feel so so about it but what I've done is organised it for a week or so out then chat in the meantime. Then you can get a good picture of who you're meeting. And if the man on text or phone doesn't match with the meet up ... run a mile!

@MotherForker

I'm in. Newly divorced got all the apps to see what it was all about. Blimey.

I'm not really looking for something serious, just cos I've only just left a marriage. But I like the idea of dating, flirting, finding out what I want or don't want.

It feels like a full time job sometimes though! I've got a few chats going, some on Tinder and some on WhatsApp. I'm hopefully meeting one guy this week, although we realised we live quite far away, but get one sooo we'll over chat.

What does iron mean?

Iron is an ongoing interest but someone you have necessarily met yet or have anything serious with eg 'iron in the fire' (I think?!)