Anyone want to join the breakup club?

[Herewegoagain22]

So today, my partner of 3 years ended things with me. Deep down I know it was for the best (for both of us) but it doesn’t stop it hurting like hell. There genuinely is no going back. It’s just going through this horrible period of looking for his texts, wondering what he’s up to, missing him in general and generally just feeling lost that I can’t stand

I'm really struggling tonight, think I'm going to have a good cry in the bath hahahah :(

Wow1111 well that's our evening planned! I always feel better after crying but this is so hard. Look after yourself.

Can I join in with the crying tonight please? Ex DP has been in touch today told me that he is arriving at noon on Saturday to collect ddog, I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do without ddog he has been keeping me going recently and I don’t want him to go (although I can’t legally stop it as we are joint owners)

Been crying since his text message and can’t seem to pull myself together, I did respond asking if he is taking the rest of his things he had left behind but apparently I’m being unreasonable in asking that as his mother only has a small car? (Ex dp doesn’t drive so is relying on family to help him collect ddog and take him 300+ miles away)

Just checking in to offer a shoulder and handhold to those crying. How are you doing?

I'm really sad this evening too. Currently looking for the answer in a bottle of gin

Hi @pigsahoy how are you doing today?

Ex DP has been to collect ddog I am utterly heartbroken and seeking solance in a bottle of rum

God I'm really struggling today. Trying to remember all the terrible ways he treated me, because I'm really fucking missing the bastard.

So sorry about your ddog, that must be utterly heartbreaking. Don't blame you for turning to booze. I'll be hitting the gin later.

Well last night we had a fight which started because I painted a wall and bought new pans etc to replace the absolutely wrecked ones we've had for years. And last night I I couldn't wait for him to leave
Today we had a nice family day out and now I'm questioning if I'm giving up on our marriage too easily but then I have to remind myself why it's ending and how totally unacceptable his behaviour has been

@pigsahoy it does get easier in time and it’s important to remember how things have been not just the good times which is natural to think back to when sad and upset, hope that the Gin is helping

@fedup078 row sounds awful only you know if your giving up too easily, however from what you’ve posted it doesn’t sound like it

@pigsahoy I like to do that too. When I have a wee moment of missing him I like to list the reasons I'm better off without him.

He would mock my vocabulary, when I used words he didn't understand he would call me stuck up

I always felt second best to his friends and their drinking culture. It felt like he resented staying in with me when he would rather be out with his friends.

@ofalltheginjoints sorry you're missing your doggo. Will there ever be a chance to get your own dog in the future?

@Rodeodown I don’t know, ddog is a rescue and has several issues but I don’t want to give up on him and let ex have him, I’m not sure that the novelty won’t wear off.

I could qualify for an assistance dog which might be a good option, a friend needs some doggy care this coming week so I’m going to look after her dog (have done before, he’s smaller and much easier to manage then my boy) so at least that’s something I suppose

@Ofalltheginjoints oh tell me about your lovely rescue boy. My mum runs a dog rescue charity and does rescue backup for the difficult ones, so I've seen my fair share of "spirited" dogs over the years.

Hopefully ex is unable to cope and ddog comes back to you full time. Is there a plan for splitting time with him at the moment?

@fedup078 I got some new pans not long ago and they are a joy to use compared to my old battered ones. Your decision sounds like the right one, I hope you can stay strong.

@Herewegoagain22 Happy Birthday for tomorrow !
@Wonderlust2 I hear you ! There was a trust element in my situation too, he was calling me rotten to his family, then coming back home & saying they were playing him, pathetic. I don't have the fall out from his family anymore, it's worth the relationship hitting the rocks to get rid of them.
@ktb123 Thankyou for sharing, my goodness it sounds as if your home is being used as an air b & b for his family. I know you said he is mostly a good man, but don't put up with this treatment.

@Calmate thank you very much.

Right on cue midnight passes and my ex sends me a birthday message saying ‘happy birthday and I hope you have a lovely day’ with a three love heart emojis. What an absolute liberty. He hasn’t spoken to me since he ended things and he has a cheek to send that, right on the stroke of midnight. I don’t even know whether to respond or not. It has made my blood boil. What was the point.

Absolute bellend

Morning
How's everyone doing ?

A bit flat today. Boring Sunday with not much to do. I've been doing great but feeling low at the thought of an endless future on my own. I miss lie ins and our weekly Sunday takeaway.

Some days are much more lonely than others.

[quote Herewegoagain22]@Calmate thank you very much.

Right on cue midnight passes and my ex sends me a birthday message saying ‘happy birthday and I hope you have a lovely day’ with a three love heart emojis. What an absolute liberty. He hasn’t spoken to me since he ended things and he has a cheek to send that, right on the stroke of midnight. I don’t even know whether to respond or not. It has made my blood boil. What was the point.[/quote]
Funny ain't it. I sort of feel the same. My ex admitted on our breaking up to not blocking his annoying ex who text him for the stupidest things even though she is in a relationship (with someone who can probably keep it up) so that he can sleep with her if he's ever lonely. When we were together he told me it's because he doesn't want to upset her brother ! And his reputation. Now he go sleep with her I don't care anymore.

Also, it kills me knowing that everybody settled down with someone long ago and I still end up with idiots.

Happy birthday @Herewegoagain22 I hope your having a lovely day?

How are you today @fedup078?

@Rodeodown oh he’s amazing! He’s from dogs trust and they think he had a really abusive history which has made him lead reactive, off the lead he’s fine, he goes to doggy day care weekly so is happy to mix with others but he’s just terrified on the lead so looks like a doggy psychopath to try and scare other dogs away, we’ve made some good progress and over the last two weeks with me I’ve worked with him intensely and using primula cheese to distract him he can now have a dog walk past him, he still growls but focus’s on the cheese!
He’s a Lurcher, is roughly 4.5yrs old is lightening quick when he wants to be and is doing zoomies but he prefers the sofa! I really miss him, more then I thought I would, house is empty without him but at least I’ve got his doggy Instagram to keep me busy with photos of him, I must sound so sad!

I've only just got dressed which always makes me feel worse
Having a bit of a down day today too

@Herewegoagain22
You know your recent ex too well ! Is he still so predicable? I hope he reads on SM that you are having a good birthday despite the lockdown.
@fedup078 Sorry you're feeling low, could you put some music on to lift your spirits? There's usually something on the radio which would help to deflect, sending hugs

Predictable ! Auto correct . .

I'm having a really down day today also :( really really missing ex

So ex messaged if I could pick dogs up, I said I was feeling a bit shit so would prefer him to drop off.. when he turns up, he hands me over a bottle of wine and chocolates to cheer me up, but says 'I don't want you thinking anything of this' my heads a mess

@wow1111 it's so much easier when they stay away, blowing hot and cold just plays with your mind. Sorry you were feeling crap. I hope today is a better day