The normalisation of OnlyFans and porn

[mistea]

I graduated from uni about 5 years ago, and still keep in touch with my course mates via a WhatsApp group chat. Recently, one of them was asking if anyone knew of any openings in our field, someone suggested that she open an OnlyFans account, and basically everyone else (it was a very male-dominated course) chimed in about how that was a great idea and that they had friends who did that and made 5+ figures a month.

Fair play but I personally know of a friend who went down that route, made a decent amount in the first few months, only to be pushed to show her face and do more and more extreme acts to retain her subscribers who all ended up leaving anyway. She has now quit but her videos are stuck on free porn sites and reposted on forums from time to time. Her case isn't a rare one.

Is it just the people I surround myself with? Or is this really how the world is today? After my last relationship broke down because of a violent porn 'addiction' on my exDP's part I feel just feel like it's all hopeless now.

@nicegerbil we're not living in Saudi Arabia or places that have such attitudes thankfully. If you think stoning etc is ok you need to get some help! They also execute people for being gay.. are you in favour of that too?

I had oodles of fake ID when I was young.

And that was using the technology available in the late 80s. IE a pen and some tape.

Very naive to think such a massive site operating in multiple countries is checking all ID let alone looking for fakes.

Come on.

Lol soccermum

This shows you're not in good faith. We've conversed on this thread before.

Enjoy your cut n paste OMG English feminists are in favour of stoning women and girls to death if they are raped!

Yep. Totally in favour. Obviously

[quote Soccermom1]@countingthebeat It says photo ID either a driving licence or a passport and you have to hold it up so they can check it's you, so at least they're taking it seriously. Obviously no one wants underage girls on there. I'm not on OF myself but the sites I used to be on were age verified too, it was a pain but if it stops underage girls using it then it's worth it[/quote]
Agree that IF it stopped underage girls using it it’s worth it but with one third being underage I find it hard to believe that they are taking it seriously . It seems many are getting friends to register or using older friends accounts and obviously plenty of creep are following them

@NiceGerbil

I had oodles of fake ID when I was young.

And that was using the technology available in the late 80s. IE a pen and some tape.

Very naive to think such a massive site operating in multiple countries is checking all ID let alone looking for fakes.

Come on.

Exactly ... and why would anybody say they are obviously taking it seriously.

@woccormom1 oh and also PLENTY of men want underage girls on there !!! SICK but true !

@Coffeeandcocopops

I’m in my 50s. I did a degree and kept in touch with lots of my male students. There is no way a man then would have dared to suggest that a female friend goes into porn. Bloody hell the men of today make my generation look like gentlemen yet they were not. Sexual inequality was rife. But nobody would have suggested porn as a career among my friends.

Yes absolutely , there’s has certainly always been sexual inequality but not the ridiculous porn culture that has made saying thing like this so common Although I remember passing through a phases of thinking men’s opinions of men mattered I quickly worked out that true empowerment comes from within and Not from the male gaze or male validation This sense of ‘empowerment ‘ some of the women talk about is a joke and total illusion . If someone gives you empowerment by viewing your pages they can take it away. Nothing is more empowering than demanding all people including men see you as more than your body parts before you give them any of your time .

[quote mistea]@NiceGerbil Uni was in London but now a fair few of us are based across the world. I think a bit of it is a courage-in-numbers thing. Almost 4 women out of almost 30 in the group chat. The only fans 'memes' and 'thot' jokes started around the start of lockdown amidst regular industry discussion and only devolved into this being a serious 'women have it so easy they can do only fans' position after that job question was asked.

And yes, we've both left the chat it's ridiculous how far the conversation is devolving now that some ex-course mates have had a bit to drink.[/quote]
OP - ask the guys how much they earn through their pimp work?
Ask them how many women they have recruited?
Ask them if they have their girlfriends, mothers, aunts, sisters on there or is it mainly friends from college?
Ask if they get more money for the clever, uni educated recruits?
Ask them if they declare this income stream on their tax Returns?
Ask if they include it on their CV - just to show how enterprising they are?
How utterly fucking depressing ..... I have three dd's. Makes me want to weep.

Yes as someone with dds this makes me sick too .

@nicegerbil am totally confused.. were you being facetious? About men not wanting unsullied women who've been raped and women are whores or virgins? I don't understand what point you're making.

I don't get why OF would allow under age girls on the site unless they want to be shut down! I don't mean they want them, just that they're not doing more to monitor who's posting on the site.

@woccormom1
Some of the biggest sites with the worst records havnt been shut down
It’s naive to think the powers that be ( mostly men ) even care about this issue

Sorry Soccormom I hit the w againnnnn .... wish we had an edit button ... please mumsnet

@countingthebeat but surely they'd care if they were shut down? Even from just a business side they'd lose their income surely?

[quote Soccermom1]@countingthebeat but surely they'd care if they were shut down? Even from just a business side they'd lose their income surely?[/quote]
Yes IF they websites were shut down they would care I’m sure but like I said HUGE websites stayed open even after multiple cases reported against them .

@countingthebeat oh I see what you're saying. The only defence I think they could offer is that they have a verification system in place but if it's being circumnavigateed then it's not much use really

One of the women in the group just sent me a private message saying that it the whole thing probably wasn't said 'using the best words' but that 'it's kind of a compliment to her if you think about it'. Amazing. Absolutely amazing.

@mistea

One of the women in the group just sent me a private message saying that it the whole thing probably wasn't said 'using the best words' but that 'it's kind of a compliment to her if you think about it'. Amazing. Absolutely amazing.

Ask her why it’s a compliment when they would ask the same of any female in a certain age group with breast and a vagina . Wow talk about females being brainwashed to think being told to sell their bodies is a compliment

@mistea

A man wants to see my boobz. What a great compliment!!!!

Since

@mistea

One of the women in the group just sent me a private message saying that it the whole thing probably wasn't said 'using the best words' but that 'it's kind of a compliment to her if you think about it'. Amazing. Absolutely amazing.

How depressing. WTF is wrong with these people?

Yy Countingthebeat

Also in my 50s and so depressed by this. I have a boy and a girl and don’t mince my words with either of them. There is nothing empowering about selling your self as wank fodder and the men who buy it are beneath contempt.

And soccermom, whilst your post makes it clear you basically did very mild stuff that I don’t think is actually porn to be honest (more catering to fetishes) to make a bit of extra cash, there are young women who see this site as a way to make a lot of cash— and they won’t do that by selling used tights etc— it’s going to take a lot, lot more. The thing is the site can be used by well known people too to interact with fans and make good money but need little more of them than getting made up , talking or trying outfits on or just ‘living’ people are nosey ( particularly women ) but if you aren’t a second rate ‘celeb’ then to make good money and gain fans is going to take an awful lot more than that- and usually the only way is ‘Porn related’ . You aren’t selling a brand, a product or your lovely personality, you are selling your body and associated bits and acts — it’s just distanced prostitution. If it’s tasteful dressed but sexy pics — well I think it’s a bit sleazy but fair enough— but it’s unlikely you would ever make much cash— sleazebags can get plenty of that for free. To me it seems much more
Like webcam stuff, except paying a membership fee to interact rather than paying each time . If I found my H using it for this purpose his feet wouldn’t touch the ground

@yetmorecrap I see your point, i must admit I don't know a massive amount about OF only what I've heard and obviously I was aware of it. I sold on other sites and yes it was mainly fetish stuff, quite tame, foot photos, sexy stockings photos, and sold tights, shoes, all pretty tame really and was just a way of making some extra cash. I didn't do anything that would be considered porn.
I think I was looking at it from the perspective of some one who like me has limits and makes it clear what they will and won't do, my worry is if there are indeed immature girls on there they won't have the same standards which is sad. I genuinely had no idea there were school girls on these sites, and I don't agree with that at all

I don’t have an issue with people like yourself soccermum, it’s not for me I have to be honest- I personally would rather do a couple of shifts at Tesco if needed, but then each to his own —-but I do have a big issue with younger women and especially under age girls thinking it’s an easy and possibly ‘glamorous’ way to earn big money by basically tarting themselves out and the fact young intelligent guys suggest it to a computer science graduate shows how ‘normalised ’ This attitude is. If someone had suggested that to me in my early 20’s they would have got a smack in the mouth, whereas girls now it seems are meant to think it’s ‘a compliment’ . I blame all kinds of things too Much easily accessible porn, women shaming other women who don’t find large amounts of porn in a relationship ok, TV that celebrates those with no special ability , apart from getting your tits out or being an airhead making very good money . Clever smart girls see that they can have a ton of debt and then a 30k a year career job after that , whereas some pretty but not particularly bright girl is making 80k a year being an ‘influencer’ or has an only fans page etc, etc. What next? instead of blokes pressurising young girls for porn star style sex, they then pressure them into only fans pages and handing over the cash etc. ?