DP gone home to play Xbox

[coldtapisbroken]

My partner doesn't live with me but spends a fair amount of time here. He's been playing Xbox with my DS8 today (2 TV's in the house). His DS10 joined online at one point and they all played together. After dinner my DS8 asked to go back on and I said no not tonight, he needed a bath etc. DP then said could he go back on (he was using the console in the living room), I said I'd rather he didn't as I'd like to relax and watch TV after cooking a roast dinner, and wind down before bed (he was staying over). DP then said that he wanted to play with his DS online again as he hadn't played with him for long. I said I'd like to watch TV. He said ok, I'll go home and play online with DS there. He picked up his stuff and left straight away. We've had a lovely day together, I made a huge roast dinner, and because I wanted to watch TV instead of watch him play Xbox he's gone home. This may sound like a ridiculous situation but I just want to see if other people think this is normal behaviour? Thanks x

This is a tricky one but maybe in his head you were stopping him from having time with his DS. If he was playing with your DS and his DS earlier in the day, perhaps he wanted some one on one time with his DS? I don't think he's right... I'm just trying to get into the mindset of a ninny.

Either way I think his reaction is completely OTT. I probably would have respected the fact that I was in your house and you'd made the effort to make a roast dinner and wanted you to relax. Storming out and then giving you the silent treatment is very manipulative behaviour. He has put you in the dog house even though he's in the wrong.

I think you need to have some serious thoughts about whether this man-child is worth your time. I mean... to not even help you with the clean up after the roast dinner? Rude!

[quote coldtapisbroken]@billy1966 Spoilt stroppy child is about right - he's still not talking to me! [/quote]
Dump him, op. You do not deserve this. The sulking is him training you to not have any expectations from him.

No @coldtapisbroken I haven't misunderstood your post, I've read everything you've written. He wanted to continue playing xbox with his son, you decided he'd done enough of that and now he should spend time with you cos you'd cooked a roast dinner. Weirdly when I cook a meal, I don't do it on the expectancy of having my partner repaying my time spending time with me, especially not at the cost of spending time with his children, and had my partner tried that with me and my child, he wouldn't have seen me for dust

@baileys6904 I don't see my partner every day so when we do get to spend some time together, it would be nice to actually do that. Between watching 2 sports matches, playing Xbox on his own, with my DS and also his own DS, he had commandeered my TV all day (apart from when we went on a short walk). I do not think that I was unreasonable to say that I would like to relax and watch some TV in my own home come evening time. This has nothing to do with his son. What it boils down to is that I simply wanted to watch a bit of TV as I hadn't been able to since the previous day. If he wanted to continue playing Xbox with his son then that's fair enough, go home and do that. I do not expect him to strop off home and then not talk to me for the foreseeable!

Have you posted about him before? Complaining about the quality of food/snacks and stomping off home as a result? If so, I thought you'd dumped him.

Him wanting to play with his ds isn't the issue. the issue is that he'd spend the entire day at your house but almost no time with you and was not willing to compromise at all so that you could sit down and relax, ideally with him, for a while.

@SpaceOp No he doesn't complain about the food at mine! Apart from the odd occasion he comes over early evening so doesn't have dinner at mine that often. He doesn't stomp off home normally either! Yes that's what my issue was, him taking charge of my house when he is technically a guest.

So if he doesn't stamp off home normally, why are you refusing to see its because of the xbox plating with his son. The sooner you can understand that, the sooner you can decide if this is a relationship for you or not. If anyone got on the way of my relationship with my child, or me spending time with him while he's at his dad's, especially when I'm in a home with someone else's child, and didn't understand why it's a problem, then that relationship isn't going to work.
If you start to realise that and why it's so important to him, then you can tackle the other problems.

Calling him a guest when it suits, is also a bit rich. I actually don't know if this is a relationship for you, it takes a lot of understanding taking on someone with kids, maybe look for someone single