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Original poster

The One Where Ross Has To Figure Out Clingfilm

964 replies

StuckInPollyannaMode · 15/12/2020 05:46

Previous thread

How’s that for a title?!

Well, I’ve done a deal on the car. Actually it drives very nicely. I can see it’s practical. And it’s not an old banger.

It’s not very me. But it is sensible, and sensible I must be.

Actually got some kip last night. 9-5.

How’s everyone else doing? Justilou is it warm in Oz? One of my best friends lives there and I haven’t seen her for too long. RandomMess have you managed to have a better night / find out when you’re going home?

I haven’t told him about handing it over to the solicitor and no mediation on Friday yet. Waiting for the notes and financial summery from the mediator first. Hopefully today.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
15
Peace43 · 17/01/2021 13:59

I had dinner with my ex husband about 6 months after we split up. DD suggested it, we all went to TGIs... I remembered why we’d divorced (in Technicolor) after less than 3 minutes. It was terrible and DD has never suggested a repeat!!

Don’t go for supper but do send the kids. Tell him where to buy nail clippers or he’ll be after the rolling pin / lint brush / sellotape tomorrow. He needs clear boundaries!

mbosnz · 17/01/2021 14:00

Could be worth telling him that Amazon Prime is his friend, for such items as nail clippers - you're not.

justilou1 · 17/01/2021 15:50

I’m also guessing you’d be expecting to bring the ingredients and cook the bastard dinner as well. (To his specifications, of course.) NO! You’ve split up!!! Get used to it, Geller!

Mix56 · 17/01/2021 16:19

Isnt he still in the family home? Or did he move out on the samecsay? He can have the girls & they can use the internet for their school work, then he can cook them dinner.

Mix56 · 17/01/2021 16:19

Same day!

Giraffey1 · 17/01/2021 18:38

Does he not know that you can buy things in shops these days? And why would you want to have supper with him, just no!

billy1966 · 17/01/2021 18:52

Thank goodness everyone also is saying the same thing.
Definitely no supper.
Do not cross his threshold.
Do not allow him cross yours.

Don't reference the clippers.
You are not his mother and now you are no longer his wife.🥳

Daftapath · 17/01/2021 20:18

Deny any knowledge of the nail clippers and tell him he can have the girls for dinner. 'It isn't appropriate for us to all be having meals together'.

Just brings back so many (awful) memories of my split (including nail clipper scenarios). Your boundaries need to be firm now. Grey Rick may be your friend

Halfagonyhalfhope · 17/01/2021 20:21

Daft I think you mean grey rock 😁 but if Grey Rick discombobulates Gellar so be it!

harknesswitch · 17/01/2021 20:22

My ex took the bloody hair dryer, that was the absolute final straw for me, no more Mrs Nice Lady..... he used to shave his head!

Just ignore the nail clippers comment, and no to the family meal either

Boonlark · 17/01/2021 20:26

Don't ever let him inside your new home. I let an ex in as he wanted to talk through some practicalities. I went upstairs to the loo and when I came back down, I found he'd stuffed some of my things into his backpack. He too had asked for little things back...

TreacleHart · 17/01/2021 21:34

My exh had it wrote into our paperwork that he had a particular love for the coffee table which was actually my coffee table.
He was hoping I'd fight him for it . I didn't Smile

RandomMess · 17/01/2021 21:36

@TreacleHart 😂😂😂😂 what a jerk!

Daftapath · 17/01/2021 21:43

@Halfagonyhalfhope

Daft I think you mean grey rock 😁 but if Grey Rick discombobulates Gellar so be it!

Haha. Good old grey rick. I find it works amazingly! Grin

daisyjgrey · 17/01/2021 23:06

My Ex husband borrowed my iron and it took me 9 months to get it back. Admittedly I clearly don't iron or it wouldn't have taken me so long to remember to ask for it back, however, it is the principle of the matter I feel.

Boundaries!!

frazzledasarock · 17/01/2021 23:33

@harknesswitch

My ex took the bloody hair dryer, that was the absolute final straw for me, no more Mrs Nice Lady..... he used to shave his head!

Just ignore the nail clippers comment, and no to the family meal either

I don’t know why but that’s just made me laugh really hard. Maybe the mental image of your bald headed ex drying is hairless scalp with a hair dryer 🤣😂

Another vote for ignore the nail clippers request.

Agree to dinner, tell him you’ll pick girls up at xx (after dinner) so he can have ample family time with them.

No way should he enter your new home, it’s your sanctuary.
And you’re not his family anymore so no family anything, especially if it entails you doing a load of work.

Original poster
StuckInPollyannaMode · 18/01/2021 06:45

Sent polite but kind response to supper invite.

I suspect the problem with Prime is that his account doesn’t have it - oh dear, something else he’ll need to pay for.

Yes, he’s still in the house and will be til Friday. It’s fine with the kids doing school there, I’m ok with that, and I won’t be there all the time. I will just Grey Rick 🤣

Or I was...

I have woken up to an email regarding child maintenance which starts with the incendiary first line:

“If it's ok with you, that first payment will start on 1 February 2021, as I now need to cover my unexpected accommodation costs and storage etc.”

Ahahahahahaha. NOPE. Nice try...

OP posts:
wifterwafter · 18/01/2021 06:50

I'm so pleased you've escaped!

As for his email re maintenance maybe say that's fine but please pay the late two weeks and February's at the same time. It's not as if he didn't know this was happening but at least you're being reasonable that way!

justilou1 · 18/01/2021 07:26

Thank you for playing the game of Deadbeat Dad...
Your time starts..... NOW!
Fucking Dickhead!
How predictable can you get? (Meanwhile, EVIDENCE, much?)

Ohalrightthen · 18/01/2021 07:56

“If it's ok with you, that first payment will start on 1 February 2021, as I now need to cover my unexpected accommodation costs and storage etc.”

Ahhhh God loves a trier.

Two options - either you tell him to get to fuck and that the payment needs to be in your account this morning. "Unfortunately that won't work for me, even when the girls are in my care they are entitled to support from you. I will expect the payment of £X in my account tomorrow."

OR you say "sure completely understand, i can wait til Feb 1st, absolutely fine, I'll expect the £X to cover 15-30 Jan on top of the £X from 1-28 Feb."

Pick whichever works for you based on budget and how aggressive/passive aggressive you're feeling.

Fromage · 18/01/2021 08:09

Can i suggest using "we" and "us" in your reaponse to his maintenance email?

The money isn't for you, personally, it is for you and your children - his children - and i think if you start by underlining thst point, it will be a tiny bit harder for him to weasel out of anything. Set the tone.

RandomMess · 18/01/2021 08:31

He is so predictable. His financial difficulties are not your problem but he thinks they are your concern 🤦🏼‍♀️

The girls need to eat and you need to pay for a roof over their head...

Had his house gone through he'd have a mortgage to pay for instead of air B&B...

harknesswitch · 18/01/2021 08:32

I think I'd go for @Ohalrightthen response re him paying on the 1st of Feb, but covering the two weeks before then, so in effect he'll be paying 6 weeks cm.

My ex once told me his finances were none of my business after him not paying for school uniforms, but affording a holiday. That was a golden nugget for me, as every time he tries something like Gellar just did, I'd respond with 'as you told me, your finances are none of my business' Grin

harknesswitch · 18/01/2021 08:33

Or you could use

'Piss poor planning on your part doesn't constitute an emergency on mine'

justilou1 · 18/01/2021 09:19

Unexpected? How, exactly??? (Well... because you didn’t organize it all for him, maybe....) But really... He has had plenty of notice that this day was coming and can pull it out of the extra £500k