The One Where Ross Has To Figure Out Clingfilm

[StuckInPollyannaMode]

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How’s that for a title?!

Well, I’ve done a deal on the car. Actually it drives very nicely. I can see it’s practical. And it’s not an old banger.

It’s not very me. But it is sensible, and sensible I must be.

Actually got some kip last night. 9-5.

How’s everyone else doing? Justilou is it warm in Oz? One of my best friends lives there and I haven’t seen her for too long. RandomMess have you managed to have a better night / find out when you’re going home?

I haven’t told him about handing it over to the solicitor and no mediation on Friday yet. Waiting for the notes and financial summery from the mediator first. Hopefully today.

What a fabulous day - for you and the kids!

Awwwww, poor old Gellar, the only person he's got left to make their life a misery is . . . him. And that's no fun, is it?!

Is he struggling to turn the taps on without you and in desperate need of your input into his TV choices tonight?

Don't worry about the car, a scrape is not the end of the world. A year from now you'll look back on it and smile at how it got that scrape over your moving weekend. Think of it as a battle scar for your trusty steed :)

A scrape on the car is nothing compared to your escape. I'm not at all surprised to hear your girls are behaving differently - the dark cloud isn't there. This is all the reassurance you need that you have done the right thing.

Enjoy the gin!

I don't understand Masked Singer. It's so weird. Mind you - could be worse - I'm sure I saw a thread on MN from a woman who'd seen a family member on Naked Attraction. That's pretty unrecoverable.

Fuck the car thing. I drove straight into a massive parked van 2 weeks after giving birth. In a car park. Like, totally, BANG. Swear I didn't see it right in front of my face.

At least you don't have to listen to Gellar droning on at you and making a fuss about scraping the car!

By the way, apricots are a very good laxative, along with coffee!

He’s going to have to get used to all communication from you now being only about the girls (not him) and everything else coming from the solicitors.
Time to file! But I highly recommend the forensic accountants, @StuckInPollyannaMode. There is no way he has disclosed all. He is a lying liar!

It all sounds great.

Good woman for not taking his calls.

No doubt he wants to bore the arse off you about his trials and irritations moving.

Well you are not longer his emotional punching bag.

You don't have to listen nor entertain him.

The girls must be finally feeling a bit relaxed.

Remember not to allow him across the threshold.....this is the girls safe place.

Hurrah! We’ve all slept, and the girls have stayed in their own beds, and the cat didn’t nag me to get up at 4am for first breakfast.

A relative on Naked Attraction? Urgh. I’ve not seen it. Gellar hated anything that wasn’t serious - hence letting the kids watch Masked Singer - which I got strangely into by the end and want to watch again next week. Also on my watch list is the Dolly Parton documentary on the Beeb. Love a bit of Dolly.

There is no way I am letting him in here. I’ll be all breezy when I drop the kids off with him - when he eventually has them - and then he’s no reason to say I’ve been into his.

I am composing an email to my solicitor today and will ask her advice on the forensic accountant.

He’s already playing silly buggers about having the kids in his Airbnb place. Apparently he needs a few days to get sorted after moving and ‘hopefully the girls will be prepared to stay over the following week for a night’. So I’ve got them full time til then eh?!

I’ve decided the scrapes give Sukey some character. You’re right, I will smile at them one day. The RELIEF not to have him catastrophising about it.

I was going to have an at home day today but I forgot a few bits like batteries and can’t find the girls toothbrushes (they’re using mine!) so probably do need to pop to a supermarket...ah well. Let’s see what happens.

Oh - any ideas how to change my home address on my iPhone for maps etc? Still set at the old house. Google is confusing me!

Use Waze instead of maps for now. It's better as a rule anyway!

In maps on my iPhone I have a list of favorites and a plus button. If i click on thé plus it gives me a list of places including home where I can click on home to change the address. HTH

In google maps next to the search should be your initial, click on that and you get to settings and can change your home.

With regards to a forensic accountant, I would be waiting until he has completed his Form E before deciding on whether one is required. You may find irregularities yourself, depending on how complex his finances are and you will have a chance to request missing information yourself.

Forensic accountants do not come cheap!

It should come out of his part of the settlement because he’s a lying liar!!!!!

During my divorce, xh threatened to get companies valued (I had shares). It would have cost tens of thousands, per company, and would have had to be a shared cost, even though he was instigating it.

He’s demanded the nail clippers and asked me for supper on Wednesday with the kids?!

😂 errr you 3 need the nail clippers so he'll have to buy them.

Absolute NO to supper. You need space, the DC need to see clearly that you are not together anymore so there are no blurred lines.

Doing things as a unit of 4 may happen again several years post divorce but not now.

Nail clippers? Really? Pharmacies are open so he can get himself a pair, the big baby.

And a hard NO to supper as a family. Not for a long, long time.
My late husband tried to reel us back in about 3 weeks after moving out by inviting us to go see Black Panther with him. Which he knew we all wanted to see, and he offered to pay. He also knew I was very broke as the washing machine died days after he moved out.

We didn't go with him, I took the girls instead and cooked cheap meals for a week.

No to supper - he needs to learn to parent his own children without you. And it’s establishing a precedent - start the way you mean to go on.

I’d send the girls for the day, tea and over night on Wednesday.

How many days a week is he doing their home schooling?

Id save your patience for things you may NEED to do together, like family funerals and school parents evenings. There’s no reason they can’t have two birthdays and two Christmases each year.

If you pick up new clippers when you get toothbrushes you can have the shiny clippers that have never been near his hooves...

Nopey Mc NO face to supper!!

I think maybe the solicitor needs to send a clear “If you didn’t think to pack it, you’re going to have to buy a replacement yourself. Do your own grownupping now.” Or you’re going to be getting calls like this all the time!!!

You should phrase the "no" as "that's not appropriate AND the DDs need time with just you"

“Supermarkets sell nail clippers. It would be best to establish boundaries now to avoid confusing the children, so I won’t be coming in or staying for supper. But I’m sure you three will have a lovely time together!”