So the the grass belonging to the OW wasn't really greener then was it?!

[jemimathecat]

This is light hearted post but I just wanted to hear if there were any stories out there where your partner/spouse went off with the OW and the grass suddenly turned to mud?!!
After being deeply hurt, I now find myself chuckling when I think of the ex (mid 50's) back to changing nappies and sleepless nights and telling his mother that he has no time for himself and cannot BELIEVE how expensive baby formula is!!
Most of his friends are driving sports cars and have grown up kids (like we also do) yet the only thing he's driving is a new double buggy ! LOL!

She's not glad that the baby died though. She's just glad that the couple are miserable. It amounts to the same thing. She’s glad they’re miserable, and the reason they are miserable is because their baby died.

And this not needing to feel sympathy goes quite a long way y’know. As much as people feel that the dh and the OW don’t deserve any sympathy over the death of their baby, so I think that the poster who can gloat over the death of a baby deserves no sympathy for having been cheated on.

@MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously

It's not just the affair though is it? It's all the other stuff they did. I doubt that poster would feel as strongly if it was just an affair. But if you were the victim of someone trashing your car, watching your house, shouting abuse at your kids in the garden and you ended up having to call the police, would you still feel compassion? I don't think I would. Especially of it turned out that said couple had done something that is closely linked to SIDS. All my sympathies would be with the poor baby, not the parents.

It’s not just about compassion. It’s the karma part- the feeling they deserved it.

Anyway I can’t agree. And think it’s too much for anyone who has suffered to go on about it. So will go

See I don't think it does amount to the same thing, but you are right in that no one is obliged to feel sympathy for anyone else. You either do or don't. Feelings can't really be helped or controlled.

MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously so if a woman posted on the bereavement boards that she had lost her baby to SIDS and it turned out that she had been an OW, would you tell her she didn’t deserve any sympathy?

Dear god, that poor woman...her baby died and you call her a slut and gloat like that...

My sentiments, too. I couldn't take joy in the death or illness of a child. No the wonder that poor woman had depression - possibly all of her mental health problems were down to the bliddy entitled, lazy-*rsed bar steward she stupidly ended up with.

AlternativePerspective, I suggest you read my posts since I've consistently said that this isn't just about the affair. If that same woman had bullied my family to the extent I needed police intervention and it also turned out that she and her dp had also been heavily smoking in the house with her newborn, I might well be inclined to think she deserved no sympathy from me. Like I said, my sympathies would be for the baby.

No bias here either way as still married to 1st husband and never been OW either. But...

...people who are arguing over whether these men really do regret the choices they made to be with OW - has it never occurred to you that exH is probably just saying this to continue to play you and the current wife off against each other? I’m sure he’s giving it “I’m so much happier with my new family; you’re so different as a mother to my first wife” to the new one, while ensuring that he gives you just enough negative information to keep you interested/invested in his life. In fairness, it’s worked like charm because it has brought you to a public forum to talk about someone who doesn’t care a jot about you.

People who put the hurt caused by an affair on par with the hurt caused by the death of a child - you are abhorrent. Are you honestly saying it would have felt the same to lose your child as it did to learn of your husband’s affair? If you are, then it’s your children who miss out on the sense of incomparable love a mother should feel for her children. No man should even come close to this amount of love (no matter how long he strings you along for)!

MumsnetHQ - this one surely needs shutting down now?

Nope still not improving it. No one deserves it.

If the affair hadn't happened in the first place then she wouldn't have had two dead babies

Jesus wept. No wonder your husband cheated on you

@JaneM8888

That is a nasty, vile thing to say. I think your husband made a wise decision.

@JaneM8888

I think some people have a problem with reality here.

This irresponsible woman chose to pickle her unborn and newborn babies' brains with nicotine and I'm the bad guy ?

I give up.

You need to do more than give up. Gross

@ JaneM8888 I’m glad your husband left you. It’s no more than you deserve.

Did your husband not get a say in the affair or the conception of 2 babies?
You make it sound like she did these things on her own.
Poor woman.

"If the affair hadn't happened in the first place then she wouldn't have had two dead babies."
If your scummy husband had kept his dick in his pants there wouldn't have been an affair.
Fuck me.
My ex had an affair and has got 2 babies with the woman.
I cant imagine being anything but gutted for her if anything happened to those kid.
What an awful thing to even think about.

I suspect the husband was only too glad to get rid of the above poster.

I suspect there was a lot more to the affair than she is prepared to admit, such as that she was an unpleasant person already and this just became more apparent.

I pity her children, not because of him, but because of her

Anyway I’ve reported the thread and various of her posts. The original one has already been removed, but the thread needs to go as it’s been highjacked by this vile woman who is an insult to the hurt that some have genuinely faced.

I don't think it's right to report a thread because a woman has expressed an opinion that you find distasteful. It's her right to express her pov.

And people are free to report. Up to mnhq what to do.

I don't think it's right to report a thread because a woman has expressed an opinion that you find distasteful. It's her right to express her pov. and it’s my right to disagree with her and report to mn on the basis that posts celebrating the death of a child has no place on a parenting forum.

She isn't celebrating a child's death. She just isn't sorry that the parents are miserable. It's not the same thing.

I find it more than distastful actually.
I cant imagine having such awful thoughts and I feel sorry for that poster that she has to live inside her own sick mind everyday.
Nobody deserves to lose a baby no matter how many women's husbands shes shagged.
I dont think that level of malice is normal.
Nothing much said about the husband at all.
How his choices have led to such an awful outcome for all involved.
Poor kids.

Does the irony of that statement escape you user?