Not invited to Parter's Christmas

[drinkribeina]

I may be being unreasonable here, and if so then please say!

Been with DP 3 years, both have kids, none together. We don't live together.

Every year DP spends Christmas Day at his Mums, with his older sister and her partner. I usually go to my parents. This year they have said they do not want me to go as my Dad is elderly and they are worried about catching Covid.

I will be spending Christmas Day on my own. My DP has not invited me to his Mum's for the day (I get on very well with his family and do an awful lot for his Mum). His Dad died a few years back.

Am I wrong for thinking it would be nice for DP to invite me to spend it with him and his family rather than let me spend it alone?

So he knows you have spent a small fortune on a games console, but will leave you alone on Christmas Day?! He sounds awful. You could sell that console on and make a good profit...

@icedaisy

Hmmm, he's an arse.

But, I would say he knows about the gift, wants you there Xmas morning to make sure he gets it. Then plans to spend day on it, possibly with sister or with sisters partner.

Mum probably has no idea of the plan.

THIS!!!! PLEASE don't give it to him OP

If you are your dp are one "household" and that household (or part of it) is creating a Christmas bubble with 2 other households surely you are not allowed to split your household and you and him both bubble with others?

If that is the case I would be unimpressed after 3 years together he had taken the unilateral decision on who your household bubble is connected with, leaving you alone.

Ffs woman tell him to get to fuck. He doesn't care like he should.

So wants you there Christmas morning to give him his present then is making you leave and be on your own for the day? Wow.

He is a vile shit. What the hell are you doing with a prick like that?

You cannot give him that present , you will have absolutely no trouble selling that on. Sell it , dump him and treat yourself. You have said he is selfish , selfish people don't change it's in their nature.You deserve better.

@drinkribeina

Yes it's one of the new games consoles. He does know he's getting it for Christmas.

Wow. So he's a prince.

• He doesn't care what you do on Christmas Day providing it's not with him/his family;
• He'll get his expensive, and hard to get hold of, present (did he ask for it?) as well as - - you in his bed in Christmas Eve, before having you slink off so he can spend Christmas as he wants to...
• Then back to the status quo after Christmas- with you being available to him and you paying for and cooking for him in your own home.

Time for an immediate decluttering of your life OP? You surely don't need this selfish, unkind, uncaring person in your life? 🌹

Sorry I'm another saying sell the console and ditch him! What a awful man he is would rather see you spend it alone than invite you! He's defo selfish

Return the console, dump the man, don’t look back.

This is not going to end well, it will end anyway so better that it does finish now than 10 years down the line.

Oh op 😓

I had similar, once. I arranged to spend Christmas with friends and told him to fuck off.

Don't be a mug. Sell the console.

No, no, no. Don't suggest to your DCs that this is all you're worth - then they could well grow up believing it's all they're worth, too!

Sounds like you've spent your life just playing servant to other people's needs. It's not good for you and it's not good for them.

Dump him, return the present and pamper yourself and your DCs.

Yes, give the present to your children, either the eldest or a shared present.

@drinkribeina

Yes it's one of the new games consoles. He does know he's getting it for Christmas.

oh, they are hard to get, you could probably sell for a profit!

OP for the price of a ps5 you could have a bloody nice weekend away with the kids (or a mate) somewhere - without some selfish guy who won't have conversations that make him uncomfortable even with the woman he's in a long term relationship with... ugh break up with him, sell it and do something lovely another time with that money.

@drinkribeina

What's more bizarre is that he has invited me to stay overnight there for Xmas Eve but seems to expect me to leave before the Christmas dinner

The most worrying part is that after 3 years, you can't express your feelings to him or find out why you have to leave before Christmas lunch.

He sounds clueless to anyone's feelings but his own. Not a good look.

Sell the PS5, get him a mug that says 'fuck off', have a lovely xmas eve at his - he's cooking and clearing up. Clear off early christmas day leaving his present. Never see him again and live happily ever after.

@drinkribeina

Yes it's one of the new games consoles. He does know he's getting it for Christmas.

LOL. You've got it because you know he wants one, and you know he wants one because he'll have been hinting like billyo.

Please return it and dump this guy - I am utterly furious for you.

Nasty bloke, dressed up as 'well he's just a bit selfish'

- hope you can really see that now, OP.

[quote drinkribeina]@Chamomileteaplease He hasn't given me a reason. To be honest it kind of comes across like it's not his problem really [/quote]
He doesn't give a damn about you, OP. Send his present back, give his sister her share of the money, and spend Christmas with your friend. Dump this selfish bastard.

@drinkribeina

I have met his ex on a few occasions and she has always been polite. I have spent plenty of time with his DC too so it's not a case of him keeping things quiet.

Yes games console is correct!

If this is the case then disguard.

He is rude, if his mother knows you will be on your own, she is rude and also his sister.

Why would you want to be part of that set up, he's still attached to his mother's apron strings.

Find someone who is a gentleman, he has shown a complete lack of kindness to you.

Do NOT give him the console. Sell it, give his sister her money back. Bye Felipe

Put that Ps 5 up on gumtree and you will probably make money on it. If his sister have you money for it pay her back what she gave you.
Tell him that since that since you were only good enough to go to this mothers on Xmas Eve for his Xmas shag and where then expected to spend Christmas day on your own you have decided to end things with him.
Tell him you wish him the best of luck in getting a PS 5 as well as you sold the one you bought for him.
I ring his mother and tell her that you won't be doing any more jobs for her as you broke up with him and tell her the reason why. Tell his sister as well she needed to buy him a present as the ps 5 is sold and reason why.

OP, you are embarrassing yourself here.

A games console for a man that won’t spend Christmas Day with you. Seriously, have some self respect.

Umm, what do you get from this relationship, OP? It sounds dead. Keep the gift, dump the man.