Not invited to Parter's Christmas

[drinkribeina]

I may be being unreasonable here, and if so then please say!

Been with DP 3 years, both have kids, none together. We don't live together.

Every year DP spends Christmas Day at his Mums, with his older sister and her partner. I usually go to my parents. This year they have said they do not want me to go as my Dad is elderly and they are worried about catching Covid.

I will be spending Christmas Day on my own. My DP has not invited me to his Mum's for the day (I get on very well with his family and do an awful lot for his Mum). His Dad died a few years back.

Am I wrong for thinking it would be nice for DP to invite me to spend it with him and his family rather than let me spend it alone?

I’d try & bring up Christmas one last time now & if he still won’t talk about it, I would go round to see his mum (in about 2 weeks time so near Christmas but not like the day before) with the loveliest present you can get for her & say “Hello Margaret, i’ve Just come to say Goodbye. It’s not working out with Mark so I won’t be seeing you all again. Have a lovely Christmas, thanks for always being there for a chat - I’ll miss you.”

If you do this before telling him even better as he won’t be able to blackmail you with “but Mother really likes you” or “Mother will be devastated” or similar. Probably text the same to the sister asking for her PayPal to refund the share of present ...

Fuck that. He's being an arsehole.

And if you're talking about the new Xbox or PS then that is a bloody expensive present! I hope he's spending as much on you?

Oh, for Goodness' Sake.

Send it back, refund his sister the money and let his Mum tell him it's over.

Use the cash to drink champagne, eat the poshest food you can, have a three hour long bath and think of him not getting his long anticipated Christmas Eve BJ and a console to ignore you with when he remembers he has (had) a girlfriend when his wages run out just after New Year.

Gosh this is brutal, so he invites you foe a shag Xmas eve then wants you to fuck off and spend the day alone the next day. That really is harsh.

Guys ...this obviously has nothing to do with 'bubbles' the OP is staying there on Christmas eve so he's clearly not worried about his mum being vulnerable or breaking the law..... He simply doesn't want her there!!! Doesn't value her company enough.. doesn't care that she will be spend the day ALONE.. Simple as that... OP can't you see this and doesn't it hurt you enough to not want to be with him anymore!?

MrsMichaelPalin excellent idea.

So long
Farewell
Aufwiedersehn
Goodbye
I’ve sold
The PS5 and you know why

Sorry, OP. But honestly, this is a wake up call, it sounds like.

He’s an arsehole.

Colour him disappointed.

It’s cruel. We all know exactly where we are on everybody’s list this year. You could have gone on for years not quite knowing this.

Luckily there’s still time to recoup your losses on the PS5. I would wait til the new year to pay his sister back.

Wow, OP you seriously deserve more than this! He obviously wants a shag then his games console and for you to bugger off so that he can play with his new baby in peace. Disgusting selfish behaviour. I doubt his mum's true colours are any better considering it sounds like she uses you for favours all the time. Does she ever do anything considerate for you? Sell the games console, I bet he has got you nothing thoughtful or decent for Christmas. Sorry you are with such an arsehole

Your recent update makes clear why your there for Christmas Eve. He wakes up and gets his games console and you go home.
Likely with some ten quid gift voucher. You deserve better

Tell him your not going on Christmas Eve.

Then block him and never mention the present again if he tries to contact you by any other means.

Watch his inner child grieve for the present.

The games console would be sold, his sister would be given her money back and he would be getting ditched!

No loving partner would do that to you, you deserve better!

This sounds awful if it was me I would stay Xmas eve and mention it will be a tin of soup for Xmas lunch and if they all let you leave before dinner to be alone text him when you get home say thanks for a miserable day were done get your stuff it will be on the step and don't look back. he would rather you be with friends or alone than his family there is no future for you both and if you want to sell your ps5 my son is desperate for one good luck op.

He sounds awful. How can he possibly have you spend Christmas day alone. Even worse spend Christmas eve there and leave the next day to go home alone. I am so sorry but this is not a relationship. You deserve so much better than what he is giving you at the moment x

Op? You feeling OK?

*I've just discussed with him and he said I should maybe see what my best friends plans are&

Bloody hell, that’s harsh. 😢

I don't often hand out a LTB, but OP, please LTB! Leaving your partner alone on christmas is absolutely heartless! I'd never do that to someone I love, a partner, family member or even a friend! It's just fucking horrible! He clearly just wants a christmas eve shag, his games console on christmas morning, and then the rest of the day free to slouch on the sofa like a teenager with his mouth wide open whilst gaming. I can't believe the nerve of the man (and I use the term 'man' very loosely). Sell the console, give his sister her money back and tell him to jog on!

@drinkribeina

So what does he do for your birthday, Valentines and Christmas?
Does he buy you an expensive thoughtful gift?
Take you out to dinner at your favourite place?

Seriously LTB

@jingabellrock

Umm, what do you get from this relationship, OP? It sounds dead. Keep the gift, dump the man.

I agree with this post ^

You should value yourself much more highly than being with this selfish sod.
Dump him now and reclaim your life. Christmas is just one day in the scheme of things but your happiness is much more important, don’t waste any more of your life on him.

Why are you doing an awful lot for his mum when you're not married to him and he's chosen (or you've both chosen) not to commit to each other??

They may also be wary of you spreading Covid to his mum (you also have kids which greatly heightens the risk). To be honest, I'm surprised you're even considering spending Christmas this year with vulnerable elderly people, including your own parents, considering the very real risk of death for them.

He just wants to hump you, wipe himself on his christmas stocking (father jizzmas) and then turf you out.

Is this what you want every year

Why do women do this? Why are you calling this man kind OP? How can anyone be kind and selfish at the same time?

Fuck him off and get rid of his present....he's selfish!!