Online dating in your 40s - Part 2

[StarlightSparkle]

New thread as I don’t think we are anywhere near done on this subject!

@timetochangeagainforever that's so crap...the MF! Why do they do that? Unfortunately we need thick skins to deal with this shit. Sending positive vibes your way... treat yourself if you can

@Amytree I'm not a good one to ask as I'm doing my own thing. I'd be happy not meeting and video call/text instead but you can overinvest this way and you can't normally tell if connection unless meeting in person. Lol I'd be happy not meeting...like I'm inundated with date requests lol

@Angelofdeath lol bushes...oh dear. Is your park busy?

Lol condoms...I was hoping he may come back...I'll be 60 still waiting and they will have expired

Sadly I think Flaky has Catfished me and may have some social awkwardness. I don't believe he will be the man in the pictures. Going by our call he sounds upper class and I'm the other end

Those dreams are crazy!

@Angelofdeath good to hear it's busy. It's refreshing to hear someone wanting to meet outside and not at house.

It would be like a dream if he came back..he has probably forgotten me...not sure why he picked me anyway but in pleased he did!

I'm disappointed as if he was nice could have been FWB if nothing else but other than that I'm fine just sad if it is a Catfish...
Never expected to actually speak to him and now I think I know why.... he's much older by the sound of him..

@Angelofdeath thank you, I'm fining funny as it's so bizarre, he was (well seemed) definitely more keen than me to meet asap. Was messaging up until 2pm then disappears.

Thinking back, I probably dodged a bullet, he kept asking me about my feet and for photos which I didn't send

Have a great date, looking forward to hearing about it -have fun

@sugarlost

Twat comes to mind after bombarding me with messages and calls and invites to meet!

Thanks for the wine, was going to get a bottle but didn't as we'd be drinking then by the time I realised it was no-go I couldn't be bothered to go back out. So the livers had a night off at leas.

I just find it so strange but not wasting anytime thinking about it

@timetochangeagainforever rev the deleted photo, your phone probably has a deleted folder. Mine does and photos stay in there for a month after deletion

Haha glad to be of assistance. If / when I buy it I'll report back

Oh no, @angelofdeath :( He's the idiot, not you :(

@Angelofdeath I'm so sorry, he is the idiot not you. if he can do this you are better off without him.

I stupidly told Mr Computer Geek that he forgot to put a bow on my birthday present (he sent me a new photo the other night). He said do you want me for your birthday then? He has got so under my skin. I'm making silly childish comments and flirting with him.

Sorry to hear that @Angelofdeath what a plonker (can't remember the last time I said that!). He's not worthy so think of it that you dodged a bullet. Keep going, I know it's a numbers game and a hard one to play but get back on the horse and go again. Hopefully your birthday will make it a lucky day for you.

Happy birthday I hope you manage to celebrate somehow.

So after being blown out by Mr Green, had another lovely conversation with Mr Blue (the wealthy one currently working abroad). All good, flattering, attentive as usual. Now he thinks he'll be able to finish in a couple of weeks, we're planning our first date. His suggestions are all lovely: meal out in central London /museum or gallery/ walk in the park with our dogs. He's also offered to cook for me at his place and I know I shouldn't do that but the devil on my shoulder is saying go for it!! I am know for taking chances but I need to keep my wits about me with this one and not let my stupid soppy heart rule my easily swayed head! Oh I don't know and the every changing civic rules obv make things difficult for us all.

He messaged me early as usual and sent a photo of him working....I need to keep things in perspective but he has really got under my skin, ridiculous I know.

Happy hallowe'en everyone. Feeling a bit down as it's the first year my adult kids haven't lived with me and I'm reminiscing the fab hallowe'ens we used to have when they were younger - don't miss scraping out pumpkins 🎃 though.

Ah what a crappy start to your birthday!

Happy birthday! The only way is up

@Angelofdeath happy birthday. I hope you can still enjoy your day.

I was out last night for mine and hadn't eaten at all all day so the cocktails went straight to my head. Which was why he got the message about the bow and me agreeing I want him as my present which has probably boosted his ego no end. 🤦‍♀️

@Isitreally77 happy belated birthday and re the tipsy texts don't worry about it, I'm sure we've all been there! Enjoy your birthday weekend.

Angelofdeath

What a shitty thing for him to do!

Well, I went on my date. Not sure how I feel, tbh

I went thinking if I have a pleasant time, that'll be nice. But he was actually really nice. Had a lovely evening.

He said he wants to see me again - asked me out tonight but I already have plans and wouldn't have seen him again so quickly anyway.

I feel very guarded. I realise that I always end up in crappy relationships because I am drawn towards men who are more emotionally reserved. This man didn't really say anything other than he thought I was really pretty; it was nice to meet someone he both got on well with and fancied; and there were times when my mannerisms and expressions were 'cute'. And yet, I could feel all my barriers shooting up because it was "too much". We got on really well. Laughed a lot and had similar positions on things.

Although there was one thing that I did quite like.

We ended up being out for around 5 hours which is far longer than I'd normally allow for a first date. After 3 hours he asked me straight out if I am 'on the spectrum'. I am. I have Apserger's. He said it wasn't an issue for him and a few of his friends are. Tbh, its the first time a man has ever asked me that. Or really understood what it meant. It's always caused an issue in relationships in the past and is one of the reasons I'm still single. So it would be interested to see if it was any different.

Sorry kind of dropped off the thread because I was away for a week with my DC.

to see the crappy behaviour going on from men...

Sending birthday wishes to all the birthday girls (women !).

@BeQuick I know that feeling of being a little scared and cautious. Can you find a middle ground, set up another date but space them out to keep things slow but allow yourself to open up a little bit?

On my side, Mr DJ (10 yrs younger than me...) and I met 4 times last week, 1st date tea, 2nd date cinema and quick dinner and carpark kiss, 3rd and 4th "dates" at his...

He deleted Tinder after our 2nd date... I waited a little longer but then did too.

We have been texting and chatting a lot this week and I will see him again on Tuesday although we are in lockdown so it will take some ingenuity...

I have definitely gone for someone who is not "my type" physically (but now we have kissed and slept together I am super attracted to him) and who doesn't tick some of my "boxes" but I am extremely happy and have a big smile on my face all day.

He apparently thinks I'm fascinating and is the first person I've met since starting dating who is not intimidated by my job/career - but genuinely interested in it.

Kind of scary because this is not necessarily what I went looking on Tinder for but I'm enjoying it for the moment and I genuinely want to spend time with this guy.

Am happy but petrified !!!!

Marking place!

Great to hear news about decent dates today.

@BeQuick sounds like a decent guy who understands you and very interested. As PP said take it at a pace that you feel comfortable with but feel good that he's a nice man who you had an enjoyable date with and who wants to see you again. Good luck

@jamaisjedors whoop whoop that's great! Good luck moving forward and good thanks hear that you're fancying someone not your normal type. Sounds like you're having a fun time, may it look no

. Yes these coved rules are making things difficult, particularly as I live in a tier 1'area but literally 2miles from tier 2 areas. Guy I plan to see, Mr Blue is tier 2 but well likely be in full lockdown again next week.....sigh

I to dropped off with half term parental duties and a nice trip away to see family and friends.

Sorry to hear mean are still being idiots, I just don't understand the game playing.

Pleased for those who have found someone they are attracted to and enjoying those first heady days!

I had another date last Saturday, he had lied about his age said he was 53 but was 57. He was nice enough and we had a nice few hours but I'm not looking for a 57 year old! I'm 50 but a very young 50 and to be honest 53 is probably too if the age I'm interested in. He asked to see me again but I declined.
Feel a bit despondent with all this talk of a National lockdown. Have quite a few social things planned this month to ensure I'm not too focused on dating so the thought if just having to work from home and not go out for a month is so depressing.
Obviously the birthday season for us as it's my birthday next week, when I slide into the over 50s 🙄