I've been reading the thread but haven't 'de-lurked' until now. I wanted to add my voice to the other pp's on here urging you on.
I also wanted to say this: the bit of you that has kept you coming back to this thread to log things and ask questions, who has kept you in contact with your support worker, who has started to more strongly tell your H to stop when he's doing things you don't want him to do, who has looked at your children and promised them in your head that you'll get out - that bit is your core self.
This is the bit that wants you to go and keeps pushing you towards that. Because it knows, without a doubt, that you are not safe and that carrying on like this will damage you and your children significantly. That is the real you!
The other voices, who say - other people will think you're silly, they won't think it's that bad, staying is better, it's what we know, we love him we can't leave him, nooone will believe us - those are the traumatised bits of you, the bits who had their boundaries royally screwed with during your truly awful childhood. They can't help but cling onto the life they know because they are scared. It doesn't mean they are right.
I cannot stress enough how you're doing the right thing by leaving. And that the way your H behaves is NOT normal or ok. Really truly, he is abusing you.
And referring back to your understandable worries about upsetting your kids - they might say they want to go home, they want to see dad, they miss him. And that's ok to feel those things and to be sad but you can't let it influence your decision to go. They feel what they feel in the moment, they don't have a view of the longer term impact of their home life. You can see that and as the grownup you make the decision about what's best for them long term.
You are doing amazingly! I can't tell you how proud I, and all of the others cheering you on, are of you right now. Please keep going! There will be a lovely life on the other side.