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Original poster

One night stand in foreign country and can't get him off my mind!

174 replies

Annabellerina · 30/08/2020 16:42

I randomly and impulsively went on a date on the last night of my holiday. The date lasted from 8pm to 8am, talking and drinking by the sea, watching the sunrise and then some amazingly hot sex. We both said we felt a strong connection and that it was a shame I was leaving the next day. I had so much fun and felt like I was 20 again! We swapped numbers and have text a couple of times since.

Is this best left as a lovely memory or worth pursuing in any way? Was the connection stronger because we knew it was a one off? I feel like I know that was the reason it was so great but at the same time can't stop daydreaming about him and would love to invite him to come and stay!

OP posts:
Blwoingbubbles · 31/08/2020 05:55

@LilyWater

He used her for sex? Because he is a man you’ve automatically assumed a power imbalance in the situation and made OP out to be some helpless emotional wreck.
They both wanted a good time - why is there an assumption of being used?
These archaic attitudes towards sex are what fuels shame when it comes to female sexuality in our society.

SandyY2K · 31/08/2020 08:43

OP.... go for it. You never know how things will pan out.

Life's too short not to follow a bit of adventure. It gives you the opportunity to see another country too.

Sounds exciting 😀

Holyrivolli · 31/08/2020 09:10

@NextOnesaGreyGoose. Reread any of Chubbyhotchoc’s posts and tell me if you consider them merely proposing caution. I’d argue that they are prudish, women-shaming, old fashioned and misogynistic.

Original poster
Annabellerina · 31/08/2020 09:26

I 100% agree with caution for my safety but I disagree that I was "used" for casual sex. I instigated the sex, I was very much up for a one off, I knew while I was having sex that I was extremely unlikely to ever see him again and I was happy with that. I put my number in his phone and left to catch my flight and he contacted me.

I do have form for getting dreamy about people I barely know and this is where I think the caution should come in. The idea to speak on the phone is a good one. I would never host him at mine because I have dc. So either way it's going to be separate hotels.

Anyway, I'm off to fantasise some more Wink

OP posts:
NextOnesaGreyGoose · 31/08/2020 09:28

@Holyrivolli

You didn't specify anyone in particular posts. You gave a general critisism to anyone who hadn't been totally supportive.

Gilda152 · 31/08/2020 09:42

You have children, he doesn't. He should come to you. Apart from that, I see no issues 😊

Original poster
Annabellerina · 31/08/2020 09:42

Also, I've never heard "good dick is prison" this is my new favourite phrase!

OP posts:
JinglingHellsBells · 31/08/2020 09:47

Wow! Just so much over thinking going on here. Find it hard to believe. Do people want cast iron guarantees or something before embarking on a romance?

OP, you are a grown woman. If you want to see this man, see him.

He's invited you to see him I assume because he'd find it rude to invite himself to your.

(Maybe- or maybe he wants you to do the running- time will tell.)

You have 3 options:

1 Go and see him
2 Invite him to the UK but give him names of hotels as you have kids at home.
3 Meet on neutral ground in separate hotels in the UK or another country.

But first, I suggest you start chatting to him by phone to get to know him more. Maybe set a date to meet a month ahead and see how the chats go before then?

ShitStain · 31/08/2020 10:31

What have you got to lose?

You’ll still have those nice memories of your first night even if he turns out to be a shit.

Sometimes you’ve gotta gotta grab your arse with both hands and see where it takes you.

Sakurami · 31/08/2020 10:39

There is no harm in keeping communicating and seeing if something develops. But make sure there is equal investment in terms of effort etc and you don't know him until you know him.

InFiveMins · 31/08/2020 12:43

I'd go for it. Life's too short for regrets!

Original poster
Annabellerina · 31/08/2020 12:45

Surely it's a covid test I should be getting anyway not a pregnancy test 😳😆

OP posts:
doopdeepduup · 31/08/2020 21:55

I married my ONS within a year. He followed me to another country. Been married 30 years.

Have a few friends with similar stories. Inc one couple who met in NZ, and he tracked her down to the EU country she lived in. Neither had a language in common, been married 12 years and have 2DC (and two languages in common).

The common theme is having fun, and the fun felt good. It doesn't have to end in wedding bells, but as long as you are enjoying yourself, you do only live once!

Original poster
Annabellerina · 31/08/2020 22:48

That's lovely! Enjoying these stories!
He has been texting again today. I'm so tempted to book a flight on my next child free weekend.

OP posts:
yourawizardharry22 · 31/08/2020 23:27

@chubbyhotchoc

Rather be safe and boring than desperate and/or dead, chasing round the world after a bit of dick Hmm
😂😂😂😂 love this
sadie9 · 31/08/2020 23:39

Has he a job? Who was he on holidays with?
Who paid for the dinner?

Holyrivolli · 31/08/2020 23:44

@Annabellerina

That's lovely! Enjoying these stories! He has been texting again today. I'm so tempted to book a flight on my next child free weekend.
Go for it and enjoy. You sound sensible so won’t let yourself get carried away. If it doesn’t go anywhere then at least you’ve had some fun.
PennyRoyal · 31/08/2020 23:49

@Annabellerina

That's lovely! Enjoying these stories! He has been texting again today. I'm so tempted to book a flight on my next child free weekend.

Go for it. Who knows what may happen! If it doesn't work out, at least you'll have no retreats.

But remember if you do go - Keep yourself safe, make sure someone knows where you are and check in with them during the time you're away. Have fun.

Houseplantmad · 31/08/2020 23:49

Go for it. Sounds lovely so why not see where it leads.

PennyRoyal · 31/08/2020 23:49

*regrets

Absolutely20 · 31/08/2020 23:51

@Annabellerina

That's lovely! Enjoying these stories! He has been texting again today. I'm so tempted to book a flight on my next child free weekend.
Oh just do it! I would! Just go for it and have a ball.
JingsMahBucket · 01/09/2020 01:03

So many prudes on this thread trying to pour ice water on everything.

@Annabellerina I was wavering on pursuing a long distance relationship after going on a date the night before I left a place to fly back home. We talked via text and Skype for several months before I bought a plane ticket to see.

I relayed to a friend of mine that I was apprehensive about it and he told me “Just jump.” My husband and I married now, 9 years later.

Definitely try talking via video and phone to see if there’s still something there. Always remember to have fun but keep your head on your shoulders. 🙂

BeachWishin · 01/09/2020 01:16

Is he younger than you? He'll probably be asking you to send money pretty soon Hmm

Original poster
Annabellerina · 01/09/2020 08:16

Is he younger than you? He'll probably be asking you to send money pretty soon

Stereotypical much? 🤣

OP posts:
espressoontap · 01/09/2020 08:59

Book the flight!