How do you split the bills in a relationship? I'm running out of money!

[Newname88]

I've lived more on my own since moving out of my parents house 12 years ago than i have with somebody so just looking to see whats normal.
Moved in with DP in Jan, i've always worked part time and received the benefits i was entitled to which meant i was living comfortably, but would have to save up to afford extras e.g birthdays/xmas etc.
Obviously since moving in together i am no longer entitled to those benefits and we split the bills 50/50 and then pay our own extra's e.g car insurance/tax, i pay the pet costs as they were my pets before we got together.
I am in my overdraft every month long before payday and am using my savings to cover me which are soon running out.
I dont buy unnessary items and i dont get my hair done/nails etc if anything the only extras i spend that i shouldnt are takeaways and days out with the DC, even if i cut back on those i would still be in my overdraft.
DP works full time and does alot of overtime too, on a good overtime month he could earn a good £500-£700 more a month but his company cut overtime since COVID and he now only earns about £200-300 more than me at the min.
He spends way more on extra's/personal stuff for himself but also spends money on us as a family etc.
What do other couples do when one earns more than the other? It's going to get to a point where i run out of savings and have nothing left!

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

@Helenakiki

You've resurrected a year old thread. Try making your own, you will get far better responses if you do.

Sorry for the bold, I want it to be obvious so Helena can see it!

[Helenakiki]

How do I do that? Sorry, first time user, I have no idea xxxx

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

Look at the top of the page and click on "Relationships"

That will take you to the Topic page

At the top you will the see "Start a new thread in this topic"

Click on that and you are away

[AbsolutelyPatsy]

at the top of the page, it says Start a new thread in this topic

[ittakes2]

zombie thread

[YeokensYegg]

@Helenakiki

I saw you weren't sure how to start your own thread so I'll answer what you wrote here.

The only thing you can do is kick them all out. Give them a week at the most. He makes enough money, he can rent a place for them.

Men like him are the biggest scam for women. They sell a happy life fairy tale but in reality drain your money, triple the amount of work done, and cause chaos.

Kick them all out and go back to your peaceful life.

[LunaAndHerMoonDragons]

@Helenakiki if you haven't found it, click on the little arrow across from where it says relationships in blue. Then click on start new thread.

[AgentJohnson]

We rent the house together, did dicuss buying but as the relationship is fairly new we wanted to rent first and see how things go.

Did “seeing how things go” include having a child? This really should have been a conversation before you moved in and got pregnant. Are you splitting nursery fees? Your eldest will be 14 soon and staying home for them is a luxury you can’t afford.

Essentially you want to know if your partner should be making up the shortfall from your lost benefits, the answer tothat question is to ask him but you have kind of limited your choices by not posing the question earlier.