I will try keep this as short as possible. After a 10 year relationship from the age of 18 and a DD who is now 5, I was single for around 5 months before I met current partner.
Weve been together just over one year, and as soon as lockdown hit and we couldnt see each other I started to view the relationship differently. Then we split briefly for a couple of weeks because I wanted space, now were back together.
So, am I being paranoid because of my last relationship or are these actual red flags??
He booked a night away last weekend friday night - saturday night, on the Friday I took my little girl to the beach where she unfortunately got stung by a jellyfish, her leg swelled up and it was quite traumatic she was screaming hysterically and I felt sick with worry being on our own. Whilst I was putting her in the car and she was hysterical I drove us to the nearest pharmacy (dont know the area too well), anyway I managed to get her leg looked at and got her some medicine. So just before this happened he said he had managed to finish work at 3:30 rather than 5 so he said lets go soon, so I managed to rearrange times with the ex and he agreed to pick DD up earlier. However, my little girl got stung so I was later, the whole time she was screaming and i was extremely stressed he kept ringing and saying when sre you ready, then he messaged me to say were going away cant your ex take her the pharmacy! Which was nearly the final straw of me telling him to stick it!
Then when I eventually told him I was ready (because I was not leaving my little one until I knew she was perfectly fine) he drove us there in a really sulky mood saying he always has bad luck etc etx. I wanted to tell him to turn the car round I really didnt want to go away with him.
Then I recently went on a day trip with my little girl and her dad to a theme park which I probably shouldn't have done. But since I mentioned I was going he is obsessed with my ex, hes told me because I went he now wants space.
Hes obsessed with hating my next door neigbour too as hes a guy and hes had random bbqs and asked me and my little girl if we wanted any food over the fence.
Then my little girls dad has her a lot at the moment as I am working, so he has her friday night so I can go to work on a saturday as it works well for me. And he constantly kicks off that it's not fair and ita affecting his life that he cant see me on a sat night, but it's ok when he has his kids on a sat night!! He says he hates my ex because of it and he even said he was going to send him a message via facebook and tell him he needs to be changing his days! Which would cause absolute chaos between my ex and I, and it's only recently that weve started to get along well.
Hes also 10 years older than me (40) and I'm thinking that age gap at the moment is quite big.
Sorry for the rambling post, hes currently not messaging as he wants space to figure out if he can deal with me praising another man (because I say my ex is a good dad) and whether he can deal with being second best to my ex (which is ridiculous)
Do you think these are red flags or me being overly paranoid and reading too much into every situation?