My narcissist.... Every single person that he has ever been with "tricked " him into the relationship. He couldn't understand why he had been with this person or that, he stayed in relationships because he felt he had to. He made out fidelity and loyalty were important but they were anything but.
Last year I had a physical injury, I was in a lot of pain and I was struggling,. I remember asking him for support, I remember saying " I'm going through a hard time, can I ask you to support me a little?". Word for word. With anyone else I wouldn't have thought I had to ask ....
Anyway, he starts picking fights constantly, and when I respond to his digs he immediately starts using the silent treatment on me, stonewalling me. I remember feeling so much anxiety, so much pressure in my body. I was desperate for him to stop doing what he was doing. I was exhausted from crying every day. At the same time I was a confused, pathetic mess wondering if it was my fault? I mean it takes two to argue doesn't it? Maybe he's stressed because I'm not well?
I found out later ( he told me, ha!), That this was the very day he started to pursue a relationship with another woman, started talking to her the day I asked for support and they had sex for the first time two days later. While I was physically unable to get out of bed.
Then he told me that the reason he had behaved badly is because I was some sort of magical creature who had made him believe that he was worth happiness and happiness meant his needs being met. His needs being met meant sleeping with someone else. He was confused because of me. I was a bad person who had made him do these things that he couldn't have imagined doing prior to meeting me.
It was a bit if a head fuck. That's not the least of it either lol.
Sorry, I went off on a tangent there. They never take responsibility, even when they clearly did something wrong. Never. It's very upsetting to be with someone like that. We aren't going back.