How does everyone feel about p0rn?

[warmsummersday]

Hi. Im feeling abit insecure at the mo, OH works away in the week and all I can think about for the past couple of weeks is porn and I don't like the idea of him looking at it. I don't know why. Obviuosly I know he looks at it, just like everyother tom dick and harry! I have some but for me to look at it is fine in my head. Can someone reasure me and make me feel better please?

So what other porn things are you into????

"Err Elizabetth, think you're missing the fact we've both said we've already done those things."

I don't think you did, unless I missed the posts about how much you love sticking things up your dhs' bottoms and how much they love it too, so much so they come to forums to tell everybody about what their wives do to them.

smallwhitecat, I think this is a losing battle here. "I like it, so it's not humiliating" seems to be the logic going on here. The fact that there are all those men out there boasting to their buddies about the humiliating acts they got their female partners to submit to seems to be passing everybody right by.

"However, we do not live in such a society."

Are you sure about that SWC? Do you really think so many people disapprove of it?

What about your other opinions? Are they all "going along with what society believes" or do you ever think of your own opinions? Do you ever think the minority might be right rather than the majority?

Trying to change the topic to discover what else is/is not acceptable btw! Props for example ...

By nappynuttynormabutty on Wed 19-Sep-07 21:56:29
Elizabetth - firstly if I asked dh to stop at any point he would do so. Secondly dh has said he'd let me fuck him up the arse with a vibrator if I wanted to do so. Don't presume that I am letting my dh take advantage or control me. FWIW, it was me that suggested anal to him, it was me that asked for it. He had no interest in it whatsoever until I suggested it.

tbh I don't get much out of sticking a vibrator up dh's arse...if I found it a turn on I would. I fail to see how you arguement that I get no pleasure from doing it to dh means it is humiliating for me to like having it done to myself...from which I do get pleasure.

I'm with octo
kinky stuff for me

I am so appreciating this thread. THose of you who have been so honest about your enjoyment of bumsex, etc, well done. It's such a lovely change for it not to have to be me putting those points yet again.
The anti-porn argument always falls over on the same ground - because the anti-porn people would never engage in whatever the specified sex acts are themselves then they always insist on claiming that anyone who does and enjoys it is either lying, deluded or too stupid to realise how 'degraded' she is. Ending the exploitation that no one is denying can occur in the porn industry(as in any and every other industry) should be about gaining protection and more rights for the workers in the industry, not bitching about other women's sexual preferences simply because you don't share them.

Yes you have made it very clear that we are free to engage in whatever degrading and humiliating acts we choose with our dps/dhs - thank you - BUT I think where we have a problem is that you consider acts which we enjoy doing in a loving relationship with our partners to be degrading and humiliating.

Elizabeth "I think this is a losing battle here. "I like it, so it's not humiliating" seems to be the logic going on here."
is exactly the point I feel, I you enjoy it you are not feeling humiliated, therefore it is not humiliating to you
No?

Nutty

I like going to Ann Summers and buying underwear etc but loads of people won't go over the threshold due to embarrasment or fear of being spotted. I think men would love their partners to go in and buy stuff but its the women who feel inhibted.

Madamez, my point exactly. Any degradation in the porn industry is like that in any other industry...it needs regulation and enforcement of regulation. It is not degrading purely because some members of society view it as such.

"The fact that there are all those men out there boasting to their buddies about the humiliating acts they got their female partners to submit to seems to be passing everybody right by."

Yeah this is true Elizabetth, but i know sure as anything that my dh is not out there doing that, to us it si something private (well apart from what I have admitted on here woops)
So yes it does happen but it doesn't mean that ALL men are like that.

Women boast to so what does that make them?
Gossips that's what.

I'm too scared to go into Ann Summers, I get sooo embarrassed, but only because of narrow minded people like Elizabeth and smallwhitecat who I feel are judging me, not because I feel humiliated

SWC - please explain why my post was nonsense.

Absolutely not. Why would I be ashamed?

I worked as an escort as well. To pay my uni bills.

I am not ashamed. Why should I be?

Oh, and while we're all being so honest, I prefer giving to recieving when it comes to bumsex, and have found plenty of male partners who like either a strap on or some other toy up their bums. The male anus, being the hojme of the prostate, is well-suited to sexual stimulation, and though women don't have prostates, the whole anal and perianal area is rich in nerve endings so anal sex (if done properly ie with lube and care to start with) is physically gratifying.

SOme people in the anti-porn camp also insist that oral sex is inherently degrading though in this case, the wider world opinion of oral sex is that it is a) 'normal' ie widely practised and b) an expression of love in a committed relationship - or it can be.

So have you actually stuck a vibrator up his bum, norma? It really isn't clear from what you are saying.

As far as I can see on this thread at least, it's a one way street (cough) which is a bit weird given that a man can get pleasure from having his prostate gland stimulated. In fact being the receiver in anal sex makes more sense for men than it does for women from a physiological point of view.

But it never works out like that. I wonder why? Could it be because men aren't that keen on submitting to degrading and sometimes painful sexual acts in order to keep their partner happy.

"The fact that there are all those men out there boasting to their buddies about the humiliating acts they got their female partners to submit to seems to be passing everybody right by."

Actually I don't know of many men who talk about sex in great detail to their mates. I know some do, as do some women but I've yet to hear them talk in a degrading manner and I've heard quite a lot of stuff in my time.

Elizabetth - even if they are boasting its more likely 'my missus is great in bed and we do this, im such a lucky bastard' than 'my wife/partner and mother of my children is a dirty whore and lets me degrade and humiliate her'

I am not a pornomaniac thank you and would thank you not to be so rude to me. I don't presume to call you names because of your personal choices.

I was just asking Beenthere etc cause you wrote this "i just hope that any films of me never end up on here as it will be difficult to explain to any partners. "

When me and dh were in London last year - we were a bit tipsy and went in at about 10.30pm and I tried on a pvc nurses outfit - but got stuck in it and had to come out of changing room to find dh to get me out of it - much to amusement of other shoppers but not to the security guard who had a serious sense of humour failure!

The green gel stuff is good

Well, to date, I've only rubbed my vinrator against his arsehole...however we do plan on taking it further. I'll make sure to keep you informed. Erm, how far in does it need to be before you'll accept that my dh doesn't feel humiliated or degraded by it?