How does everyone feel about p0rn?

[warmsummersday]

Hi. Im feeling abit insecure at the mo, OH works away in the week and all I can think about for the past couple of weeks is porn and I don't like the idea of him looking at it. I don't know why. Obviuosly I know he looks at it, just like everyother tom dick and harry! I have some but for me to look at it is fine in my head. Can someone reasure me and make me feel better please?

SWC - nonsense.

What do you think their friends are thinking about the woman who is being discussed? She's just an object to them or wank fodder.

I remember before anal sex was as popular as it is now (thanks to porn), a married guy I knew of was having an affair with a very young woman. He made sure everybody in the whole world knew that he'd had anal sex with her. The men in his group used to like to gossip about her a lot. It wasn't done with respect, they thought she'd been degraded. Their friend of course was a hero. She on the other hand was a dirty sl*t. Vile, absolutely vile (them, not her).

I do not think that anyone who is in the sex industry really wants to be made legal.why would they. it means admitting it to someone. the girls and women i met really do not want it.

I think you'll find I had SWC, and I don't think you can use that as an excuse anyway, you cannot make sweeping generalisations and NOT offend people

Elizabetth - the only reason we haven't is because I'm not keen, nothing to do with him not wanting to be degraded

I'm going to bed!

Nutty - they like it further in!

Elizabetth - that is one man, a man who's behaviour I would not condone. However you talk about many men doing this as though it is the norm. I would suggest that most men stick to very basic info when discussing sex with their mates.

"Well, to date, I've only rubbed my vinrator against his arsehole...however we do plan on taking it further. I'll make sure to keep you informed. Erm, how far in does it need to be before you'll accept that my dh doesn't feel humiliated or degraded by it?"

I'd say you do it to him for the same amount of time as he normally does it to you.

i meant if they showed up on the web

i visited loads of blokes who were married with children and many of them were quite young

"Elizabetth - that is one man, a man who's behaviour I would not condone. However you talk about many men doing this as though it is the norm. I would suggest that most men stick to very basic info when discussing sex with their mates."

Now that's the funniest thing I've read on here. You don't know men very well do you?

They get "man points" (some of them literally) for doing stuff like this. A lot of it is all about bragging.

Elizabetth - ok, I'll do that later on tonight then and report back in the morning.

I still fail to see what difference it makes if my dh takes it up the arse.

no Elizabeth, I think it is you that doesn't know men very well, but blindly accepts the stereotype of them rather than finding out the truth

"Now that's the funniest thing I've read on here. You don't know men very well do you?

They get "man points" (some of them literally) for doing stuff like this. A lot of it is all about bragging."

I think the vast majority of men would find that insulting tbh.

The majority of my friends are men, I work, and always have, in male dominated environments, and none of the men I know talk in the way you describe, and actually find it quite bizarre if they hear women talk like that.

Elizabeth: sex with a partner often involves some trade-offs of what one person likes best, then what the other person likes best. Doing to your partner exactly what you like them to do to you isn't necessarily going to do a lot for them (not even in same-sex couplings) as people's particular turn ons vary, as do their response times (ie how long it takes them to reach orgasm via a particular trigger).

People who are opposed to porn often have this incredibly narrow and reductive view of sex...

i worked as an escort for a while when i was studying and yes i did go to mens houses to have sex. it did not matter at the time because i wanted money. the men were mostly youngish and good looking but the houses were often obviously family homes.

i wonder...elisabethtt do you love your body? do you? do you think it gorgeous, do you love to show it?

just wondering...

"Enjoyment of a sexual act does not neceesarily mean it's not degrading. The fact that the act is perceived as enjoyable by the participants does not change the essential nature of the act. For example, ther is apparently a gay bar in New York where men can lie in a tough and be pissed on by other men. No doubt they enjoy it, but no sane person could not possibly claim they are not also being degraded."

how very VERY authoritarianistically fascistic.

your sanity is odious.

"I think the vast majority of men would find that insulting tbh."

The truth hurting and all that you mean?

The reductive view of sex madamez is that the woman is a passive receptacle whilst the man does things to her - a view of sex that is promoted overwhelmingly in pornography.

A lot of people who watch porn can't get out of the man=dominant, women=submissive frame of mind, as we've seen on here.