How does everyone feel about p0rn?

[warmsummersday]

Hi. Im feeling abit insecure at the mo, OH works away in the week and all I can think about for the past couple of weeks is porn and I don't like the idea of him looking at it. I don't know why. Obviuosly I know he looks at it, just like everyother tom dick and harry! I have some but for me to look at it is fine in my head. Can someone reasure me and make me feel better please?

"Actually more hetro couples par take in anal sex then you'd think, and I think it's quite insulting to say it is degrading."

Lots of men who persuade women into having anal sex with them are quite clear that they think it is degrading for the woman. It's part of what gets them off.

This is quite an enlightening article -

men.style.com/details/blogs/details/2007/07/is-it-ok-to-dem.html#more

Well actually my dh wasn't sure about anal sex...it's me that wants it, it's me that gets off on it. Not because it degrades me but because I think it's fucking ace...I cum all over when I get fucked up the arse.

Jesus

I think that's the most unpleasant thing I've ever read on here.

You are kidding me Elizabeth "mens style" PMSL

It is past the 9pm watershed time policywonk it is gonna get graphic. lol

sorry Policywonk

"Lots of men" - not all men, Norm's man clearly doesn't want to degrade her.

If YOU feel that you have perfect power over any situation how is it degrading?

I'm back! Free to join in now but it looks like its winding down. Is it?

If anyones interested I love porn, dp loves porn and we watch it alone, together and have been known to make our own!

I love doing alot of the things that elizabeth has suggested are degrading and I really cannot see how it can be degrading if I enjoy it, dp enjoys it and it's just for fun. I like him to dominate me but have been known to be dominant also. It has no bearing on the rest of our relationship whatsoever, I'm certainly not submissive in the rest of my life.

I have in the past got myself into stupid situations and done things which were degrading and I regret. But it is not the act it is the situation and circumstances and how I feel about it that makes it degrading, not what I was doing.

And I'm with nutty on the bum sex!

Not literally mind

You go pesha!!!!!
Mind you may have upset some people with you making of porn.
How could you degrade yourself like that.

"norma, I'm sorry, but just cos you like it doesn't mean it's not degrading. I think what you are really saying is that you like being degraded, let's be honest, and that's fine. But equally, for many women it's not, and many (like me) would have grave concerns about a man who wanted to behave in that way, or enjoyed watching women being treated in that way."

Perhaps you should take your own adivce. Just because you find it degrading doesn't mean I do...you are the one who is generalising. I simply say that I enjoy it and don't find it degrading.

Oh and I don't find those things humiliating either.

Err no. Theres no humiliating aspect to any of it. Its dirty and taboo and men get off on that, so do I, but humiliating - no, not in my world. Which does appear to be quite different to yours I think.

Do you find sex humiliating? or going on top? being done from behind? anal? blow jobs?

Where do you draw the line? Who are you to draw it?

Two things - next time he's got his willy up your bum, tell him to stop and then decide who is really in control of the situation.

Secondly, when he suggests it again after that, pop round to Anne Summers and get one of those toys they sell there (if you haven't got one already), show it to him and tell him "you first".

Those two things will probably give you a clearer idea of what is going on. Then you can come back and tell me I'm talking rubbish.

I'm not saying that my opinion is decisive but you continue to refer to these acts as humiliating and degrading as if they have been judged to be so. It is in your eyes that they are humiliating or degrading and not in mine.

"But again as Elizabeth points out, if you think many men don't get off on the humiliating aspects of the particualr acts you discuss, you are kidding yourself."

You keep referring to the humiliation...for someone who enjoys it, it's not humiliating.

Elizabetth - firstly if I asked dh to stop at any point he would do so. Secondly dh has said he'd let me fuck him up the arse with a vibrator if I wanted to do so. Don't presume that I am letting my dh take advantage or control me. FWIW, it was me that suggested anal to him, it was me that asked for it. He had no interest in it whatsoever until I suggested it.

Elizabetth

1. i have on occassion told him to stop and there is absolutely no doubt that he would immediately do so. Although its normally me asking him not to.

2. I have got a couple already and he'd be happy for me to try them on him, its just me thats not keen.

Ah go on both of. You can report back as you are so keen to broadcast the details of your sex lives here. We'd all love to know how it turned out.

Why do you insist on saying it's humiliating...it's not. You are not persuading me that I'm being humiliated by asking for something I enjoy.

Err Elizabetth, think you're missing the fact we've both said we've already done those things.