How does everyone feel about p0rn?

[warmsummersday]

Hi. Im feeling abit insecure at the mo, OH works away in the week and all I can think about for the past couple of weeks is porn and I don't like the idea of him looking at it. I don't know why. Obviuosly I know he looks at it, just like everyother tom dick and harry! I have some but for me to look at it is fine in my head. Can someone reasure me and make me feel better please?

Laurie. you have gone too far now. I shall be reporting your post as it is extremely unfair and totally uncalled for.

Btw I take offense to your assumption that because I watch porn I enjoy watching women get raped.

I wouldn't report her...I'm one for free speech and all that.

Its precisely why you can't tell from their always-coming expressions that you shoudln't buy it.

You don't who is being exploited - who really wants to take that chance just to have an orgasm??????????

It has been a hell of a night but.......................................

I am off to watch some porn before i go to bed!

"what do the women here think about their partners using the perennially popular "barely legal" porn?"

and you know this is popular how exactly? not in this house it isn't, and i suspect not in the houses of those that are on this thread.

"Elizabetth: is it your argument now that men could never and would never refuse sex? Of course men consent to sex (or refuse it) - because women initiate sex. Or are you going to suggest now that women who make the first move must all be damaged and deep in denial? Again, your generalisations about sex reveal your experience and understanding of human behaviour to be very limited: I suspect you're pretty young."

Actually I've been around the block. :P

First you tried insults - implying I was an idiot or somesuch, now you are trying condescension. None of these approaches are working - they just make your arguments look very shakey madamez.

If you pay attention to society at large - how people talk about sex, to pornography, to the media, you will see that sex is generally portrayed as something women "consent" to. I'm not saying that's how things should be, I'm simply describing how things are. I'm sorry you're finding it so difficult to follow my arguments, but I will try and explain wherever you seem to be missing the point.

By Elizabetth on Thu 20-Sep-07 00:20:40
I don't think it's possible to have porn without exploitation. If you removed all the very young women, the poor women, the drug-addicted women, the women with rape and abuse in their backgrounds, the women with pimps pushing them forward from the workforce there would be hardly anyone left to appear in it. Porn and prostitution aren't career choices like becoming an engineer or a teacher or a nursery worker.

But even if you could find this willing fully consenting workforce, porn itself is degrading to women, it shows women being treated like objects by men (bukkake anybody? double penetraion?), as dehumanised sex machines who are ever ready and ever willing. It gives a very unrealistic view of sex.

Speaking of the very young though, what do the women here think about their partners using the perennially popular "barely legal" porn?

Firstly I'd be quite willing to star in porn tho as KHIN pointed out earlier I'm not sure there's a big market for baby belly porn. Porn itself is not degrading, so I disagree with you on that point.

As for your last comment, I'll say again it's me (not my dh) that uses porn. Personally I don't really get turned on by the "barely legal" thing...tho I don't have a problem with it per se.

oh Elizabeth stop being so bloody naive - have you stopped and looked around recently

exploitation is everywhere - it underpins out society

the rich get richer
and the poor bloody suffer

consumerism meant the poor bought in got a ford and called themselves middle class

The porn consumer should be informed and buy their porn accordingly.

it is all consumers can do - vote with their feet.

your argument is erratic - you refuse to state what your point is which makes the argument increasingly difficult

you are arguing for better regulation as far as i can see - of the unregulated unfiltered porn which comes through on the internet.

fine. i dont think anyone opposes women or men being forced to do things they catagorically do not want to do. hence regulation

so, do be a dear and put together a definitive argument.

You're reporting me because I used the word raped instead of exploited.

Sick of tiptoing round the truth.

If you are being exploited in porn you are being raped

You don't have a problem with the barely legal thing?? Its ok to show women pretending to be school children

Now thats a post that shoudl be reported - this is a parenting site !!!!!!

no, because it was a direct and personal attack on norma, suggesting that she enjoyed watching people being raped.

LFC: the argument that porn on the Internet must somehow involve the unconsenting is one that's chucked about a lot, with very little hard evidence that there are that many producers making films/pics with forced labour. It us, of course, possible that there is some out there, but the risk/reward equation doesn't favour it much. (bear in mind, too, the existence of 'acting' - a performer who says 'No NO' might very well be fully consenting to appear in the film and perfectly happy about it, but saying scripted lines because he or she is portatying a character). Most of the crime involved in internet porn is copyright fraud: stealing other people's images or footage.
ANd anyone who buys a DVD properly labelled and produced (or distributed) legally within the UK, the US, Europe and most of the world can rest assured that the industry is very tightly regulated, proofs of age are demanded etc. And if you buy any illegal or bootleg DVDs you may well be contributing to human misery in the form of slavery and people trafficking, whether it's Sexy Anal Gangbang or the newest Harry Potter.

and it being a parenting site is relevant why? does being a parent remove our sexual desires?
I dress up in a schoolgirl costume. don't see why it is a problem tbh.

LFC - I'll agree with you that where people are underage that is rape. However again, this is purely an argument for regulation...not for banning porn.

Can you read? It's "barely legal", that means legal...do you have a problem with me dressing as a schoolgirl for my dh?

Actually what I'd argue for is for prostitution to be made illegal, or rather for paying for sex to be made illegal and for prostitutes themselves to be decriminalised which would wipe out a huge swathe of porn as it is filmed prostitution.

I'd also make it possible for people who have been harmed by pornography to be able to sue pornographers.

Try not to get your knickers in a twist custardo, you only had to ask what I thought the solutions to the problems of porn were and I'd have told you. This discussion seemed to be more about general opinions than any particular solution however.

I did not say she enjoyed watching people be raped.

I said that people are exploited (raped) on the internet and she said she watched it anyway and then she equalled it to buying something else unethically.

"This discussion seemed to be more about general opinions than any particular solution"
that would be because we were answering the thread title.
you turned it into another discussion entirely

Actually I'd argue for prostitution to be legalised.

I have no problem with you dressing up in anything for your partner - norma was talking about internet porn and said she didn't have personally a problem with the 'barely legal' thing.

If you only meant dressing up as a schoolgirl for your husband then that obviously is different - its not what you said in the post

no knickers twisted here Elizabeth, your reading a different tone from which it was written.

i agree that the people in the industry should have available the same employment lawws as anyone else.

so we are getting somewhere - you don't condemn porn as a genre per se

No, I don't have a problem with the "barely legal" thing. You said did I have a problem with women being made to look like schoolgirls. I personally don't given that they are in fact over age...I was comparing it to me dressing as a schoolgirl for my dh.

I want prostitution to be legalised to afford protection.

Elizabetth: in society at large people tend to accept that both men and women often enjoy and initiate sex. The only time consent is discussed is when there is an accusation that someone engaged in a sexual act without a partner's consent. And FWIW there are occasions when complaints of sexual assault are brought by men against women: but they do occur. However, the view that sex is something men DO TO women rather than something that people DO WITH one another is not at all widely held these days. The idea you seem to want to perpetuate: that women are infantile, bemused and incapable of choosing for themselves whether or not they wish to have anal or group sex does women no favours at all.