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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dp constantly moans about my boobs

346 replies

Mumofthree1984 · 13/04/2020 16:05

Sorry for the rant but I'm so so so pissed off. Dp constantly moans about my boobs, yes they are quite big a 38 DD/E he hated me wearing balcony bras so I took him with me to get fitted in M&S into full cup bras (his choice) a pack of two padded and 2 lacey, he was ok with these at the time. My black padded one has somehow gone missing, I'm. Sure it's in the house somewhere but with 5 of us living here probably got mixed up somewhere. Any way he hates me wearing low cut tops, when I say low cut they aren't the type that my tits are literally hanging out, in fact u can't even see my cleavage just my chest. He says it's if I. Lean forward u can see done some of them. This is becoming very very very draining. I even ripped a bra off in an argument well actually 2 now, we were going up to the cemetary to visit my dads grave, all ready to leave and he starts, we'll that tops a bit revealing, i was so angry, it's not even showing anything! I ripped the top. Off anf the bra, so. Now I'm. Down to 1 bra yes 1, i refuse to buy anymore, I can't afford it, i said why don't we just cut my boobs off, that's the last option we have. I'm not wearing turtle necks all year, so. Now I'm sat in my pyjamas really annoyed whilst he is in my room. Going through all my tops! I've had enough seriously enough

OP posts:
ScrapThatThen · 13/04/2020 17:23

He is really controlling. Have you been treated badly before maybe to not realise this is not ok? You get to choose what you wear no one else. And go where you want on your own to buy what you need with your own or shared money. Anything else is abuse. Would you maybe look at the Freedom Project website? Please draw a line in the sand for yourself and if he crosses it again then leave. Please.

mommymooo · 13/04/2020 17:24

This is domestic abuse!!
Even if it is the only thing you argue about.
He knew how you looked when you got together and now you have to hide and change.
And your be like this for the rest of your life.
DaffodilDaffodil

Electrical · 13/04/2020 17:25

Ahh right, OP must be missing the Jeremy Kyle Show. Me too, love.

Sammiches101 · 13/04/2020 17:30

Oh op! Your updates were bad until "he won't let me go alone" haven't RTFT but read enough that my stomach lurched for you.

Shoxfordian · 13/04/2020 17:33

He's abusive
Please leave him after the lockdown

JKScot4 · 13/04/2020 17:34

JFW! I think OP is deep in denial, her previous posts in last few weeks alone suggest he doesn’t get on with one of her confused kids, thinking of ttc and he’s clearly a controlling arsehole.
Cmon woman, take a deep breath and end this disaster.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 13/04/2020 17:36

Why does he get a say in your bra? What has happened in your life for you to have so little self respect that you stay with a man like this? You could do so so much better!

MashedSpud · 13/04/2020 17:37

Is he worried your tits might raise the dead?

MaeveDidIt · 13/04/2020 17:43

So he's insecure, controlling and possessive.

Personally I couldn't bear either one of those things let alone all three!

It honestly makes me feel suffocated just reading your post.

What attracts you to him?

AncoraAmarena · 13/04/2020 17:45

Always a give away when a poster starts off with loads of information and then as more and more people get outraged, they tail off with their replies, which get shorter and shorter. Hmm

Mumofthree1984 · 13/04/2020 17:48

I'm. Not a troll, this is the only issue in our relationship., if I could delete this aspect /problem all would be absolutely fine 😔

OP posts:
Mumofthree1984 · 13/04/2020 17:48

I'm not tailing off he is trying to talk things through and moaning I'm. On my phone when I should be taking to. Him

OP posts:
Mumofthree1984 · 13/04/2020 17:52

Apart from this one issue he really is a lovely bloke, lovely with the dc, great with my mum, all my family etc, it's. Just this bloody issue with my boobs, which without a beast reduction or turtle neck top wearing all. Year isn't going to go away

OP posts:
Fluffycloudland77 · 13/04/2020 17:53

It’s a gateway issue though isn’t it? Nice men aren’t controlling.

Shoxfordian · 13/04/2020 17:54

Would you swim in a pool if there was a shit in it? Or drink tea with only a drop of poison? Its toxic and has abusive

GinWithASplashOfTonic · 13/04/2020 17:57

I'm sat here trying to think of various bra bass puns to say this and can't

Just LTB!!!!!

Mumofthree1984 · 13/04/2020 17:57

It is and I've told him it's got to stop ffs ist stressing me out, ive got work tommorow, now have a banging headache, it just goes all smooth for a few weeks then he starts again

OP posts:
Terralee · 13/04/2020 17:58

Omg reminds me of my next door neighbours partner, except she's really slim & he has her believing she's fat & constantly insults her.. so sick of his shit... they've split up but he keeps using his access to his children to try to worm his way back home!

OP it will get worse. If you have a child with him you'll be tied to him forever.

Mumofthree1984 · 13/04/2020 17:58

I refuse to buy any more bras, im. Skint now as it is, I can't afford it, i shouldn't have ripped them, but I was so. Angry and fed up, I was like fine I fucking won't wear one full stop then

OP posts:
noyoucannotcomein · 13/04/2020 17:59

How can you say this is the only issue (which is appalling enough!) when you've also said there's no way he'll let you go to the cemetery on your own??

CarolefeckinBaskin · 13/04/2020 17:59

What an absolute idiot!
The breasts are yours OP and he doesn't get to control them or how you see fit to dress them. He is abusive.
My dh wouldn't dare attempt to tell me what to wear nor dictate what underwear and clothing I can own. He doesn't even notice when I answer the door or put rubbish out braless- what does it matter I'm not topless ffs
I agree with someone above - he is judging other men by his own standards. Seriously he's telling you he is a dick. Listen!

LovingLola · 13/04/2020 18:01

You have brought an abusive controlling man into your children’s lives
Why can you not see this ???

MashedSpud · 13/04/2020 18:02

Rip up his underpants so he has no ball support.

Dangly, saggy bollocks will teach him!

NewRoadToHappinessxx · 13/04/2020 18:02

Please get out as soon as you can. Trust me you are being abused and it will only get worse especially if you get married or have children. Please please get out of there. You deserve to be with someone who loves all of you xx

SunshineCake · 13/04/2020 18:04

Come on. Now you're sounding like a stroppy woman.

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