Can't believe it

[mugoverandover]

Sitting acrosss the front room from my "DP",
I've been suspicious for a while, last night when he was asleep I linked his Facebook to my phone, right this second I am on it and so is he, messaging another girl,
I'm furious our 8 year old DS is sat in between us I want to lose my fucking shit! He asked her if her daughter is sleeping out this weekend, she said no and he said ok babe!
I'm shaking, I don't know if to tell him I know or to keep watching for a day or so to see what they say 😭😭😭😭

You probably won't know if she's read the message. She'll have got it as a message request, and message requests specifically say that unless you reply or click accept that the sender won't know that the message has been read.

I thought OP message ow signed in as her dp. (I could be wrong)

He doesn't deserve you. Hope you get over this quickly x

Wow he is Lower than a snakes belly so sorry you are going through this Sending strength op x

Print off your screenshots and pack his bags and put the print offs neatly in the top of the bag and leave it outside the door for when he finishes work tomorrow

What's the point of waiting and watching.

You don't generally ask someone if their child us staying with them or not that night/weekend unless you plan to stay over (or at least visit for a while) and it's rather unlikely you're visiting or staying over to play scrabble or tiddlywinks. Esp when you're an attached man in contact with a woman his partner knows nothing about and whom he's communicating with secretly behind her back.

So op he's got some kind of health condition (mental health?) that means he doesn't work, any financial contribution to your household is what he gets in benefits, you work, presumably he doesn't look after your son .... And on on top of that he's a cheater.

Sounds like a waste of space and a piss taking bastard

Bet he does next to nothing around the house too? Does his mental health problem affect )of is it use to excuse his behaviour to you and ds?

I didn't say anything 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ give me strength I'm not the type of person for confrontation I hate it, don't know what to do

Do you have screenshots / pictures of everything? If not then get them before you speak. He WILL try to convince you you're mad / read them wrong / they weren't how you remember. You need screenshots to show yourself so he can't make you doubt your memories.

Has he got his phone? I wonder if she's messaged him to say that you have messaged her? Giving him time to come up with A good excuse?

Hand hold OP this shit is always so hard emotionally

Take your time you are in shock you have the screenshots saved so confront him when you are ready

I am not particularly confrontational but would be really tempted to join their chat as I would find it difficult to remain as calm as you despite my best efforts either my face or sarky comments would tell him something was up

I really feel for you, OP. This must be hard to process. @FlyingWithTheDevil made a good point about her letting him know you messaged. I would confront it sooner rather than later.

It's ok I have his password so every time he went on his phone I was in it too waiting for any message to or from, there was none, he's asleep now and I've messaged her off his messenger saying I won't be messaging you anymore i know it was just chat but I'm getting back with my ex sorry,
She read it and ignored so I guess that means they never met!
However he will now know this tomorrow when he wakes up now soooooo......

Does it matter if they met or not?!

Fact is he’s sitting across the room from you messaging another woman! What else are you waiting for?!

💐 Sorry you are going through this.

Why did you say in the message that you were his ex?

Kick the cocklodger out.

Why did you say in the message that you were his ex?

Don't understand that either.

Why did you say in the message that you were his ex?

Probably because op feels that the other woman would think ‘oh he’s been cheating on his gf, so she can’t mean that much to him’.

Rather than ‘oh, he’s reconciled with an ex who he obviously rates more highly than me’.

Christ

OP there's no point in fabricating anything. That could be perceived to mean you're as bad as them.
Can you ask someone to have DS while you deal with this as in chuck him out?

If it's messenger, you can delete messages, but only from your side. She will still have the msg she received.

What an arse. I wouldn't message her anymore, just see if she contacts him tomorrow, I'd join the conversation if they message each other.

How are you op? Did he notice you had messaged?

Linked his FB page to your phone? What does that even mean? You’re on FB as him at the same time he is? Or on Messenger simultaneously? I don’t understand.